I haven’t been on any dating app, dating, talking to, romantically/sexually/confusingly involved with any man in the past 5-6 months and this is literally the best my mental and emotional health has been in a long time. I had spent the last 5-6 years dating fucked up men and that shit almost fucked me up completely. I still deal with creeps all the time (my postmates delivery driver used the app to get my number and hit on me, several random dudes stop their cars to harass me walking down the street) but not letting men into my into my space like that has done wonders for me:

  1. I haven’t had to give a flying fuck about what some man, any man thinks or wants

  2. I’ve had time to focus on what I want for myself in the next few years without considering some somewhat significant other (was completely stuck and unable to plan anything with my lukewarm, anxiety causing ex).

  3. No pointless, dull conversations with lying creeps on online dating apps. No disrespectful interactions with anyone

  4. I have time to really consider what I value in a partnership in the future rather than pick one from a pool of poor dating choices and hoping it works

  5. I haven’t had to consider anyone’s sexual gratification besides my own

  6. I have had time to repair the damages to my self image and self esteem from no longer seeking or entertaining the attention of men

  7. I am entirely more focused on personal and professional growth and enjoying my life for me only.

I wish I had had the courage to do this sooner because those years in my 20s could have been a lot more fulfilling. At least 80% of the lies, manipulation, disrespect, anxiety, and anger I experienced in the last 5-6 years involved some LVM I was either talking to, dating, sexually involved with etc. Maybe I needed this lesson in order to better prepare for a brighter future.