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Three Totally Psycho Covert Contracts Made By *Nice Guys*

[deleted]

May 11, 2014
9 upvotes
/r/TheRedPill
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Post Information
Title Three Totally Psycho Covert Contracts Made By *Nice Guys*
Author

[deleted]
Upvotes 9
Comments 26
Date May 11, 2014 5:18 PM UTC
(12 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/25ahr0/three_totally_psycho_covert_contracts_made_by/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/three-totally-psycho-covert-contracts-made-by-nice.229999
https://theredarchive.com/post/229999
Red Pill terms in post
nice guythe red pill

Comments

[–]Calbruin 17 points18 points19 points 12 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Many of us, at some point in our lives, are guilty of the first contract. This is right out of "No More Mr. Nice Guy".

[–]Katalyst81 5 points6 points7 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Having just found TRP, and reading NMMNG, I will not be making that first contract ever again.

Instead, I'm going to do nothing but read all the resources here, and hit the gym.

[–]TheSuperRedneck 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I feel like the friend zone scenario being so common makes it an exceptionally strong example to use because of how instructive it is and how much most men can relate to it. It's such a simple situation to describe, but it's extremely deep when it comes to illustrating places where men go wrong and how to really understand how attraction works.

[–]wubalubadub 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

To put it like the Black Philip himself, the 'friend zone' is about options. In a successful relationship, a man needs to have options, and he needs to give his woman options. On one hand, you can't let a girl be your only option. Once she realizes this, she will try to get as much of your time as she can without giving you pussy. It's basic economics. Thinking otherwise is actually misogynistic, it's assuming that a girl doesn't understand her own desires as well as a man does.

On the other hand, you need to give a woman options. Tell her go ahead, fuck other men. Get attention and time from other men. However I am the best option there is, and I don't want to waste my time with a woman who doesn't view me as her best option, who views me as settling.

[–]Endorsed Contributorburningtimber 9 points10 points11 points 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

The Martyr without an Audience sounds like the Just World Hypothesis.

You see it here when guys hate some girl. They dream that she will "hit the wall at a million MPH" or grow old with lots of cats.

It's all chump bullshit that seeks satisfaction in fantasy.

[–]TheSuperRedneck 4 points5 points6 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I think that all covert contracts are some variation or another of the Just World Hypothesis with the idea being that if I do X then justice will be done in that I will be given Y.

[–][deleted] 12 years ago* (7 children) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]TheSuperRedneck 3 points4 points5 points 12 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

The point is that the "if" does not match the "then." The husband in this scenario believes that the wife will treat him will because he goes to work and pays the bills. That's not what gets you good treatment from a woman. "I will cook, clean, and have good sex with you regularly" is not a part of marriage vows.

[–][deleted] 12 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]3trplurker 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Guy attempted this, didn't go over very well.

[–]long-lostfriend -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

You mentioned a wife who goes on CL to get gangbanged. I am pretty sure that infidelity is a violation of the marriage vows.

Plus, I'd argue that the regular sex is part of the package as well.

[–][deleted] 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]long-lostfriend 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Then perhaps you should write more clearly instead of blaming the 84938 people who have pointed this out to you.

[–]FortunateBum 4 points5 points6 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

My opinion on this nice guy thing:

Men think that people like you if you are nice to them.

Women only care about status.

So "nice guys" like a woman, treat her well, and think that's all positive. He probably genuinely likes the object of his affection and continues to discover things about her he likes.

Women, on the other hand, only care about perceived and relative status. (This is proved by evo-psych research, BTW.) Women like you if you are of high status. You can beat them, treat them like shit, whatever you like. As long as you're high status, women will like you.

In short, men prize and pay attention to behavior, women status.

This framework explains a lot once you start thinking about it.

[–]3trplurker 4 points5 points6 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It's modern men who have been taught wrong. They are thinking to treat the women like they would treat another man. Amongst men we do things for each other and build teams as long as it's a net positive for the whole. It's how we hunted game when we existed in tribes. Women didn't hunt and stayed near the tribal camp foraging for whatever was nearby in a relatively safe environment.

So all those "covert contracts" are actually things men to for each other, you help me now and I'll help you later type stuff. It's why the concept of "your word is your bond" is so primal to men, it's one of the core ways we lifted ourselves out of the primal world.

Never, ever, trust a women to tell you the truth.

[–]2RedPill4LYF 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

  1. This one is basically something I was raised and taught to be the correct way to gain female approval. My parents told me to do it. The school told me to do it. Girls told me to do it. I understand now that it doesn't work, but I'm not blaming myself.

  2. I was raised in a strict religious family that preached these ideas.

  3. This one is called out in the comments: "Gotta call bullshit on #3. I’m pretty sure that both his and her marriage vows, like, for instance, ‘forsaking all others’, love, honor, weren’t at all covert. In fact, I think that she said all that stuff – proudly – in front of all her friends and family."

[–]TheSuperRedneck 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Aside from cheating on him -- love and honor do not cover the behaviors that the typical unhappily married guy are looking for.

People who keep bringing this up are using an argument that is the perfect example of a covert contract. What was agreed to in the marriage vows does not cover everything that the husband is expecting to get in exchange for going to work and paying the bills. In fact, going to work and paying the bills were not in his marriage vows either.

The marriage vows argument against the third example is completely off base, and it just goes to show that the covert contract is alive and well even when we think it's not.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 12 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

The 1st contract is why I haven't kept a male friend in years. I had no idea my male friends wanted sex from me for years, when I finally figured it out I felt sort of guilty. I never took money or gifts from them, but some of those guys spent so much time with me and I honestly thought it was for friendship and nothing else.

[–]wubalubadub 3 points4 points5 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Well hold on there. There's a prevailing opinion on this site that a man only wants sex from a woman, and that every friend a girl has secretly wants to fuck her. There is a LOT of truth to this. Blue Pill guys especially are guilty of this, because they have been told that friendship is the key to relationship intimacy.

What it boils down to is what you have to offer to a friendship or a relationship. If all it is is your pussy, then you're only going to have men interested in you for that. But if you're a nurturing, interesting, mature and feminine woman, mature men can value your time for other reasons. If you're attractive, they will want to fuck you. That's our nature. But again, if they're mature, they will realize that their physical needs are separate from their emotional needs. If you're open about not offering pussy in a relationship, but then have more to offer, you can absolutely have regular friendships with men.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I have started to be friends with my husband's family. His brother, and other married men in the fam. I just don't want to be that female that leads men on. I have spoken to my husband about this very issue. I am quite attractive and easy to get along with so mostly I stay at home in order to avoid any misconception.

[–]2johnnight 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

You can have male friends as long as they have girlfriends who already meet their sexual needs.

If I were a friend to a woman, we would be spending time together doing friend stuff. My biology makes me be attracted to any woman, that I spend prolonged time with, unless that 'LTR mate' slot in my brain is already occupied by the image of another woman.

But then, she would probably prevent me from spending time with you 'as a friend', which means this scenario would not be happening.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Yeah. I have a husband. .how comfortable do you think he would be if I had a male friend?

[–]long-lostfriend 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

He wouldn't be at all. Even if you are completely faithful, he knows what the other guy is up to.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Exactly.

[–]long-lostfriend 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

If I were a friend to a woman, we would be spending time together doing friend stuff. My biology makes me be attracted to any woman, that I spend prolonged time with, unless that 'LTR mate' slot in my brain is already occupied by the image of another woman.

Biology doesn't care about any "LTR mate" slot. You may be able to resist a woman you are not repulsed by, but that doesn't mean that there isn't a lingering attraction you are not acting on.

[–]greycloud24 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

ima call bullshit on #3. the traditional marriage vow ends like this "till death do us part", which implies that when the marriage contract breaks, the parties have consented to be able to kill each other.

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