[Humor] Remember that feminist programming language satire? It has taken off...

IllimitableMan · 2013-12-16T16:46:41+00:00

UPDATE: Apparently some twitter legbeards made a list of the people supporting this on github (which was taken down soon after) and proceeded to call the supporter's companies telling them they were "participating in the harassment of women" so they tried to get them fired.

fiat_lux_ · 2013-12-16T16:38:43+00:00

Even with minimal knowledge of algorithms you'll get a chuckle out of them.

My personal favourite

#consider <feelings.Xir> #consider <iomegaphone.Xir> #consider <Dworkin.Xir> #consider <progressive_stack.Xir> #consider <Affirmative_Action.Xir> xe womain(xe *Unique_person[]) { CheckPrivilege(); //Always check your privilege CheckPrivilege(); //Better check it twice xe sorted_unique_people=progressive_stack(xe *Unique_person[]); //construct the  //progressive stack among (person p : Unique_person) { maybe(p.gender==male && p.orentation==het_cis_scum) { yell('RAPE RAPE RAPE RAPE!!!!!'); crush(p); //Use the function crush in Dworkin.Xir to discard the oppressor ENDMISOGYNY perhaps_and_equally_valid { ynt q = accepts(guilt_feel(p.oppression)); //measure the oppression level according to  //the function guilt_feel in feelings.Xir sorted_unique_people[q]=accepts(p); //assign every wonderful person a place in the new stack ENDMISOGYNY maybe(feels==right) { affirmative_action(&sorted_unique_people) //If the progrym feels like it, it will  //use affirmative action to make the sorting more fair.  //The actual affirmative action algorithm is poorly understood,  //but DON'T MESS WITH IT! IT IS FAIR! ENDMISOGYNY ENDMISOGYNY return sorted_unique_people; ENDMISOGYNY

fiat_lux_ · 2013-12-16T18:04:08+00:00

The philosophy section is creative.

But without class hierarchy or even classes in general, then how will we have protected classes?!

dropit_sphere · 2013-12-16T19:09:59+00:00

I can't begin to describe how much I love this.

GuideGhost · 2013-12-16T20:18:38+00:00

Github took the original repo down, so it was moved to bitbucket. This was the author's commit message:

Nota bene: In light of recent events, we'd like to express our concern as to the blatant hostility some people in the social media have against the original, old-school spirit of playfulness that same call the 'hacker spirit'. The purpose of this software project is two-fold: one, to explore the implications of 'feminist-inspired logic' on computer programming languages; and two, to explore how much 'hacker playfulness' we could get out of this process. However, too many people, it seems, are none the wiser and perceived our project as something that is unabashedly anti-women, some even accusing us of 'harassing' women. How could a page so self-evidently playful be sincerely misogynistic is beyond all our comprehension, save for the lament that too many people nowadays lack the ability to understand other people before giving in to knee-jerk reactions of hatred and selfishness. Indeed, we dare say, it is these so-called self-brandished 'feminists' who take offence at almost everything that is making females a hard time in the computing industry by perpetuating the stereotype of the eternal victimhood of a female programmer. To this the Feminist Software Foundation is deeply disappointed, and would like to send a pull request to you all to remove that little chip on your shoulder, and enjoy the world a little bit more.

through_a_ways · 2013-12-16T19:23:58+00:00

I wonder how many feminists thought it was a real thing.

SlickJamesBitch · 2013-12-16T20:29:10+00:00

No constants or persistence. Rigidity is masculine; the feminine is fluid. I.e., fluid mechanics is hard for men 'because it deals with "feminine" fluids in contrast to "masculine" rigid mechanics'.

I never cared much about Dawkins until I saw THIS.

Instead of "running" a program, which implies thin privilege and pressure to "work out", programs are "given birth". After birth, a ....

Don't tell me to give birth you fucking pyg.

2013-12-17T00:26:53+00:00

bool logicalComputation() { if (this.hasVagina) { throw new RandomFeelGoodException(); } else { return this.lookAtFactsAndMakeRationalDecision(); } }

Piroko · 2013-12-16T17:38:35+00:00

No compiling.
No objects.
No state.
No constants.
English syntax.

Enjoy your HyperHaskell.

I'm not even sure its possible to have an english syntax language that isn't object oriented, because english itself is object oriented (subject verb object). HyperTalk was extremely object oriented.

neilmccauley1980 · 2013-12-16T20:16:11+00:00

Hilarious !!!

VZPurp · 2013-12-18T02:02:08+00:00

They've already updated wikipedia articles about it:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bitbucket#Criticism_and_Controversy

Title	[Humor] Remember that feminist programming language satire? It has taken off...
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	67
Comments	40
Date	December 16, 2013 4:35 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1t0k4u/humor_remember_that_feminist_programming_language/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/humor-remember-that-feminist-programming-language.232063 https://theredarchive.com/post/232063

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