I'[M] posting this hoping for some insights, I hope it's allowed. I've lurked and read your stickies and guides just because it interests me, and I think a lot of what is said is spot on. So I hope you might be able to help here.

I'm 32M married to a RPW, we have a good friend 28F who's on her way to being redpilled at least the sort of RP seen in this sub, and I'm at the limit of my ability to advise her in regards to her dating issues and I think you guys may have the insight we need.

The long and short of it is that even though she is what I consider to be high value LTR/marriage material, she gets into crap quasi LTR's with men who don't do much if anything in the way of making her feel as if they're grateful to be dating her, or cherish her - even as much as could be expected in the early stages. She's sensible with sexual escalation, and she's a very well put together woman and I don't think her desires are at all unreasonable. She has no problem attracting men, just filtering out the bad ones quickly. I don't think it's a "her" problem at this stage, it's a vetting problem with the guys she's dating and it's taking too long for her to determine that they're actually lazy and kinda entitled. They're not bothered about planning dates or making appreciative gestures, they'll leave her seenzoned for days or weeks at a time - but only after a fairly promising start of a few good dates. They're very good at hiding how unsuitable they are until she's quite invested. She's gone from dating a few betas to guys with a seemingly good mix of alpha and beta traits but none of then have been quite there.

I read the 3 part vetting guide and it was absolutely excellent, it would just be great if perhaps some of you could give me some pointers to relay to her about how to assess whether a guy is going to be generous, appreciative and available in the ways that she needs within the first few dates. She's going to have to date and disregard a lot of guys to find the kind of soft alpha she needs, and if it takes too long and too much emotional effort to vet each one (let alone getting into bed with them) it's going to exhaust her - she's already taken a 6 month break from dating after the last guy.

So what can she do to test whether a guy is likely to put effort in, during the early stages and first few dates, or behaviours to watch out for?

TL;DR: friend keeps meeting men who start off strong as apparent soft alphas but end up getting lazy and complacent, making her feel unappreciated and undervalued. How can she screen these guys out within a few dates?