I had a fair bit of money, and I didn't ever see the point of keeping it cooped up in a bank account for "the future" - it served me better when it turned into things that I valued at the time, like going to expensive restaurants, going on trips to other countries, buying beautiful things. Whenever I was in a relationship - usually short term, at this part of my life, or sometimes even a single date - I'd spend money on my partner. We'd go places, have new experiences. I'd rent a penthouse suite for me and my one night stand...

But as I got older, I realised that these things weren't so valuable to me. I wanted my money to work with me on some longer term, more meaningful goal like getting some land and building the house of dreams. To do that, I had to be more frugal, to invest, to get my money working for my future, to improve the less immediate but perhaps more rewarding parts of my life.

But my new, long-term partner was disappointed when they discovered that I had blown heaps of money on my previous partners. "Why don't you spend the same on me? That's unfair!" I explained I was a different person, especially in terms of financial thinking - the investment would reward us both, make our lives more fulfilling and joyful, but it required a bit of restraint in the now.

What do you think? Should my partner judge me for treating them differently to how I treated my previous partners, or should they be focussed on the me that they've just me and judge me based upon my current financial outlook? Have I built an expectation and then not met it? Was my only hope with my current partner to be as thrifty and finncially savvy in the past as I am now? Should I go back to my old ways?

Edit:

I find it interesting the guesses made at what gender I or my partner am in this story, because I was careful to use gender-neutral language. There are four redditors who refer to my partner as a female. So my second question is, Why are people coming to this conclusion?