How to overcome fear of increasing NCOUNT

Kara__El · 2019-10-19T20:00:51+00:00

> alphas don’t really wait for sex

This isn't true. Sure, they're not going to wait until engagement, especially when you're not a virgin, but it's not unreasonable to expect an alpha guy, especially one with just the right balance of beta traits, to wait until you've established a relationship. You're 27. Six is not that bad. This sub can provide a great toolbox, but that's all it is. Don't over read and panic.

> I was thinking that now that I already had 6 partners in the past I don’t have much to lose and I should do it with a good man that I am attracted to even if he won’t commit first. .

Six really isn't that bad at your age. There's no reason to assume you're used goods and tack on 10 more.

> I know a lot of people who married who had sex within the first week of meeting someone.

Don't let anecdotal evidence convince you that sex doesn't change things. It does. It clouds your vision and keeps you from really getting to know someone. Maybe six months doesn't work for you, but first date sex rarely creates strong bonds.

> I want to have a passionate relationship and not be with a guy that I am not really attracted to but who is willing to wait because he doesn’t have much options.

I feel like you might be suffering from TRP fatigue and maybe you should take a break from the Red Pill reading. You're operating in extremes. You don't have to put out on the first date and you don't have to wait until marriage. Plenty of good guys will respect a girl who wants to wait for commitment, especially for actual sex. There are so many things between kissing and sex and everyone has different boundaries.

szsunshine · 2019-10-20T22:37:10+00:00

The only guy who ever asked me for my n-count was an a-hole. (Well, one guy asked if I was a virgin because he was going to be extra careful if I was). Adults have a past and they have sex and they have sexual partners.

IMO you need to work on your self-esteem. If you feel insecure around the men you are attracted to, then work on yourself and develop qualities (whether it is looks, accomplishments, hobbies, social skills) that make you a better and more confident partner. A man who is worth your while will not want to have sex with you before you are into it. The vibe I am getting from your post is "I am willing to be a doormat for an alpha if it gives me a chance of a LTR." Having sex before you are ready, out of fear that he will just move onto another partner if you don't put out, will not get you anywhere (except for used).

Slay_Like_Buffy · 2019-10-21T13:00:12+00:00

I’ve never had a relationship where a man asked for my body count. A mature man won’t care so whatever your number is just keep it to yourself.

gimpgirl555 · 2019-10-19T19:28:19+00:00

Here's my experience: worrying about your N-count is for young people who don't have jobs, kids, and adult responsibilities.
Once you have those things, usually around 30, it's weird to even bring it up. Literally no one cares. If you somehow manage to find a guy who does, he's weird and you should stay away from him.
Men will care a lot more about you being responsible, stable, and a good life partner.

misscleanex · 2019-10-19T19:23:22+00:00

6 isn't that bad. To be honest the N count thing is a little oversensationalized. The right man won't care. That doesn't mean that you should sleep with whomever, but it's not like it's the end of the world if your n count increases. Arguably, the best strategy to focus on is making sure you're having sex in the context of an exclusive relationship.

I think a bigger issue here is your lack of self confidence that the right man will respect you and wait until you've committed. Those men exist!!!!! Maybe try making yourself available in places they tend to be instead of worrying so much about your partner count being a deterrent. Church is a great start!

Title	How to overcome fear of increasing NCOUNT
Author	maninana
Upvotes	3
Comments	8
Date	October 19, 2019 7:04 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/dk84kz/how_to_overcome_fear_of_increasing_ncount/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/how-to-overcome-fear-of-increasing-ncount.291816 https://theredarchive.com/post/291816

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