Tips for Penetrating Virgin

[–]FinancialThanks113 points14 points15 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]yoloswagobey1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]lolomotif129 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (18 children) | Copy Link

[–]PiperBigBell5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link

[–]Zombiespire5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Zombiespire1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]PiperBigBell-2 points-1 points0 points 4 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link

[–]Zombiespire0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link

[–]PiperBigBell4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link

Without getting too deep here's something to chew on my brother. Every girl loses her virginity to someone. A woman being a virgin is no indicator on how she'll treat you. Her being good to you. Her serving or submitting to you. Why? You don't know her yet. Marriages in the past were socially forced not because it was healthier but because it was what society said was healthier.

If society is cohesive your mind tricks you into believing whatever ideas the society is invested in are already true. Ego investment. Marriages in the past were based on co dependency, a culture of shame, scarcity, lack of options, sexual shame, and fear of unknown paternity.

There's nothing special about two virgins except they haven't yet experienced other options. You know. The human experience. Society's problems are about managing human nature without archaic rules and the freedom we were inherently born with.

[–]Zombiespire-1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link

This is completely ignorant of fact. Everything you just said is theoretical and subjective, not one thing you said could be considered being a fact.

This fails to take account the effect sex has on human psychology and the brain. It also ignores the first thing I said, that in the MODERN DAY, with no sexual restrictions and social norms regarding sex going the complete opposite of traditionalism or conservative values (anti slut-shaming, encouraged mentalities to not marry or settle down, promiscuous sex, evading responsibility through abortion), partners who have had few or no other sexual partners statistically have had the healthiest and longest lasting marriages.

For both men and women, when they have promiscuous sex with a large quantity of partners, the brain that creates the strong emotional bonds that occur when you have sex with a person, begins getting hardened and deadened. Similar to how people burn out their dopamine centers with drug, porn, masturbation, or sex addiction. This happens especially quickly if the first sexual experience, especially for women, was traumatic or meaningless. As in a one night stand with a complete stranger, that they were not emotionally bonded with, and never seeing them again.

With each consecutive sexual partner a person has, the more difficult and unlikely the person will be able to have emotional connections with an LTR down the line. This is why divorce and failed relationships are so common nowadays. This is also why when a virgin loses their virginity, they exhibit strong senses of attachment to that person. When and quite often the other person does not reciprocate that strong sense of attachment (usually because that sex was meaningless to them due to the quantity of partners and meaningless partners they have had), it can sexually traumatize that person. Leading to feelings of resentment for that person, resentment for the opposite sex, or resentment for sex in general. This is also why prostitutes and strippers dislike sex or are even repulsed by it.

This is why "hook up culture" is a bane on our society, and why the "Dating/Sexual Market" has been corrupted and ruined. Committed relationships, traditional gender roles, and nuclear families with children build civilizations.

[–]PiperBigBell3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

I feel like you discounted everything I said without thinking it through my friend. Sexual shame was at an all time high in the old days. Everyone scared to be open. The only place that was accepted was marriage. Sexual repression was the name of the game because you couldn't let that part out without a marriage. Marriages were based on co dependency. As in the man and woman had assigned roles and couldn't deviate.

And they had to depend on each other for certain things or they would be negatively labeled. Like in olden days where the man HAD to be a provider. And the woman HAD to be a cook and a home maker because their survival depended on it. When you abide by the rules of no sex until marriage, you have no options. Meaning, you only get to have one person. That's all you know. So you have to believe that person you married was the best choice because of society and ego investment in those ideas. Finally, marriage was about exchanging resources and paternity.

If a man knows he's fucking a virgin he knows the kid can only be his. As far as resources, fathers would give daughters away or have to approve to make sure she was taken care of. Next points. Virgins may statistically have had the "healthiest" and longest lasting marriages. But again why???? You're not digging in deep. If you believe divorce is wrong you have to stay married. If you believe sex with only one person is the right thing and you happen to honor whatever God and you like sex, staying married is in your best interest.

If you want to fuck another guy or girl it wasn't as easy because you didn't have the game skills to do it. The access wasn't as easy. Community enforcement makes staying together easy. So does shame. Let's not discount all the couples who secretly hate each other or feel stuck. Or did it because it was the "right thing to do". And who is to say what healthy is? Not knowing your options. Stuck in co dependent gender role style dynamics. Bound by society's rules as well as religion and never knowing your true self.

Lastly, your views about sex are archaic. You severely underestimate women's ability to fuck for fun and not need it mean anything. Women love to fuck and they love fucking random guys. How do I know? I'm one of the guys they do it with. Having sex with too many different people isn't what kills the ability to connect.

It's why you do it and your expectations. If you believe sex is about bonding and emotions on like some kind of core belief you were raised on level, then sleeping around could hurt you. However my friend, people not now, nor did they ever fuck for love or bonding. That's a trick our brains tell us to compel us to breed. We fuck because we're horny. If we weren't horny, no fucking.

The attached feeling some, not all but some women get, is because that feeling is based on bonding so they can raise a child together. In this age where we can fuck for fun and nothing else with little consequences, and where most of us aren't trying to have kids, that feeling doesn't serve much purpose. What primarily hurts women is not sleeping around but the relationship they had with the man. Was there a lot of fighting, abuse, false expectations, lies, jealousy, narcissism, gaslighting?

With each person you interact with, even without sex, you can pick up bad habits and pain from that fucked up person. And if you have archaic beliefs about sex combined with dating fucked up people or not knowing the game, you get burned out and jaded over time. It's the quality of the relationship. Not the sex. Sex however can be an expression of the quality of that relationship and more importantly the chemistry. For both guy and girl. There is no such thing as meaningless sex.

Why? People have sex because they wanted to. That's the meaning. You only feel empty if you had another desired outcome attached to it that wasn't satisfied or you don't get what you want out of it. Sex and relationships are a lot more complicated than you're making it out to be. Most of us want nothing to do with those tradcon thinking or values. They don't serve us in this modern society.

[–]Zombiespire0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I was really hoping you would talk about actual science and Psychology at least once instead of philosophy, history, and sociology. Or even statistics, but you just dumped a lot of argument, which is valid, but baseless argument.

As in the man and woman had assigned roles and couldn't deviate.

OR, they chose not to deviate because it worked. Because it is literally in our DNA to adhere to natural gender roles. Males being providers, females being nurturers. Do you think there was social shaming in our ancient roots in tribes? There was no culture even invented yet, before writing and just developing language, there was only the reality of biology. And why do you think humanity all over the globe developed the same way into patriarchal civilizations with gender roles? Because our DNA literally demands it. Any race or species that did not adhere to their DNA, died out and doesn't exist anymore. Effectively breeding ideas of gender equality out of the gene pool. Now in the modern day, those who CHOOSE (no one can be forced to do anything within the West) to adhere to their gender roles and biological imperative tend to prosper in fulfillment and happiness.

And they had to depend on each other for certain things or they would be negatively labeled.

Yeah because there was a reason that was a social norm, because they knew that it is what worked. I'm not saying unhappy relationships didn't exist, but that comes down to compatibility. But you're acting like happy relationships didn't exist and that heterosexuality was just forced on humanity by the Catholic church or something. We have literal centuries worth of romantic literature and culture and you believe people only got into relationships because they were obligated to. Makes no sense.

Virgins may statistically have had the "healthiest" and longest lasting marriages. But again why???? You're not digging in deep. If you believe divorce is wrong you have to stay married. If you believe sex with only one person is the right thing and you happen to honor whatever God and you like sex, staying married is in your best interest.

I explained in detail why. Which is in line with our understanding of psychology and neurology. Your arguments are more in line of gender studies at best. I didn't say that it's the only thing that's right, I'm saying it is the best way to strive for. God, or Church, or society has nothing to do with the fact. The healthiest relationships, long term happiness and fulfillment, come with not having promiscuous sex, for both genders. I am not saying ALL relationships succeed and people should be forced to be with whoever they first had sex with. That is Saudi Arabia levels of archaic. People need to date and meet new people to figure out if they are compatible, and that issue is the root of divorce. I am pretty anti-divorce and that has to do with the sanctity of marriage. But I am ALSO anti-rushing into marriages. Which has been an issue for a very long time. People should be absolutely confident they are compatible BEFORE they marry, not during or after. All divorces are the cause of two incompatible people that should have eventually broken up earlier, and not get trapped in a legal and spiritual bond with each other. But we should still strive as a society to care about the sanctity of sex, and producing more successful marriages. Which is the best and easiest way to find long term happiness and fulfillment in your life. People are more empowered than ever to date, break up, marry, or divorce whoever they want. Stop talking about societal restrictions like that actually matters because it doesn't. If it takes someone 4 LTR's before they found the one, that's fine. Not ideal but that could just be the hand you were dealt. I am against people having 2000 one night stands, then be surprised when they hit the wall and are unhappy. Research women being unhappy they focused on career and missed the chance to have a family.

Lastly, your views about sex are archaic. You severely underestimate women's ability to fuck for fun and not need it mean anything. Women love to fuck and they love fucking random guys. How do I know? I'm one of the guys they do it with. Having sex with too many different people isn't what kills the ability to connect.

Ok no one said sex is not fun. In both men and women during sex you are experiencing large doses of dopamine and epinephrine (adrenaline hormone), same chemical you feel when doing drugs or eating food, and the feeling of excitement when you are skydiving or driving dangerously (like adrenaline junkies). When you experience an orgasm your hypothalamus goes into overdrive and you experience a surge of oxytocin (this chemical plays a role in social bonding) and dopamine (pleasure chemical). These are the factors on what makes people PHYSICALLY enjoy sex. So naturally these sources of dopamine, as seen in any addict, from alcoholics, to masturbation or porn, or drug addicts, men and women get hooked on sex in the same exact way. And this is called sex addiction, and since there is very little stigma when it comes to sex addiction, similar to how there is currently little stigma for marijuana addiction, those who are addicted to sex don't feel the shame like they're doing something unhealthy, like when an obese person feels shame for overeating. And sex on it's own isn't an unhealthy act, in fact it's our biological imperative to reproduce so it would be counter intuitive if it was unhealthy. It is not like alcohol that damages the brain and liver. Everything that is unhealthy with sex addiction comes with sex and relationships themselves. Where the emotional bonds that are SUPPOSED to come with sex, in order to provide a healthy union for a father-mother family, that is required for a child's healthy development. So point being, humans are often addicted to dopamine and you have fucked probably multiple of them. So congratulations, you didn't prove anything.

If you believe sex is about bonding and emotions on like some kind of core belief you were raised on level, then sleeping around could hurt you. However my friend, people not now, nor did they ever fuck for love or bonding. That's a trick our brains tell us to compel us to breed. We fuck because we're horny. If we weren't horny, no fucking.

"Sleeping around could hurt you" It hurts literally everyone in some way, even if they don't realize it yet. Now you were actually onto something there. A lot of people trivialize and take the magic out of love by reducing it to just "chemicals in your brain." Ironic you trust the chemicals of your brain to tell you they are chemicals. If love is just a chemical that plays a role in our physiology, then that means love can be understood, and we can adhere to physiologically healthy behaviors for the brain that relies on these chemicals to continue the existence of the human race. Fulfillment and happiness are also "just chemicals". In order to produce that chemical we have to play by nature's rules. If we don't it gives us the unhappiness chemicals. You can trivialize the reality of nature all you want, but you have never been farther from defeating it.

In this age where we can fuck for fun and nothing else with little consequences, and where most of us aren't trying to have kids, that feeling doesn't serve much purpose. What primarily hurts women is not sleeping around but the relationship they had with the man. Was there a lot of fighting, abuse, false expectations, lies, jealousy, narcissism, gaslighting?

And why aren't we trying to have kids anymore when that is the path to the happiness and fulfillment chemical? That builds upon itself by building civilization, which is the source of prosperity and security? The first two needs on Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Why are we sabotaging our civilization and actively working against our own needs? It is primarily because we have been the victim of more than a century of carefully crafted propaganda. Some for ideological reasons like feminism. Some for money, like consumerism. All of it propaganda sabotaging the human race, or more specifically Western civilization. As for what hurts women. Yes we are in agreement that dysfunctional relationships hurt people, that is obvious. And sometimes that can lead them to unhealthy behaviors. Such as promiscuity or resentment of the opposite sex. Make no mistake this is damaged behavior, not actions of a healthy person. Continued...

[–]Zombiespire0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

This is the 2nd part of my reply

With each person you interact with, even without sex, you can pick up bad habits and pain from that fucked up person. And if you have archaic beliefs about sex combined with dating fucked up people or not knowing the game, you get burned out and jaded over time. It's the quality of the relationship. Not the sex. Sex however can be an expression of the quality of that relationship and more importantly the chemistry. For both guy and girl. There is no such thing as meaningless sex.

You are saying interesting things that make me think you are on the edge of an epiphany. A dysfunctional relationship can be mentally damaging to one or both parties. "You get burned out and jaded over time." This is what I'm talking about. People are making themselves burned and jaded with sex, this is what I have been talking about this whole time. And how that damages our society. "It's the quality of the relationship. Not the sex." Very odd you imply that sex and a romantic relationship are mutually exclusive things. Sex is a giant part of a healthy romantic relationship, many relationships become dysfunctional or end based on the quality of the sex life. Sex is under the relationship, not outside it. Thus it has the power to impact the relationship. "There is no such thing as meaningless sex." You are correct. All sex has an impact on the human mind, for better or for worse. When I say meaningless sex, I am referring to the act of having sex just for the sake of having sex, removing the human connection from the equation. Using strangers as onaholes or dildos, is meaningless sex. As in it had no meaning to one or both parties. Continued...

Why? People have sex because they wanted to. That's the meaning. You only feel empty if you had another desired outcome attached to it that wasn't satisfied or you don't get what you want out of it. Sex and relationships are a lot more complicated than you're making it out to be. Most of us want nothing to do with those tradcon thinking or values. They don't serve us in this modern society.

Want, desire, attachment, and satisfaction do not exist in a vacuum. They exist inside the human brain filled with chemicals that you referred to earlier. Why do we want, why do we desire, why do we become attached, and why do we feel satisfaction? Because our brain is a vat of chemicals that produces all of these things for a specific evolutionary reason. People can ignore the reality they live in by choosing not to think about those "tradcon thinking or values." That doesn't make it stop existing. An alcoholic is still and alcoholic even if he chooses to consciously ignore it. It is not possible to not be a part of reality, or nature. Only when we can convert all of our being to completely virtual is that even a possibility. These "values" and "archaic beliefs" don't serve us in a modern society? Society is supposed to serve us, the people, the human race. Modern society is what is now failing to serve us. That is The Red Pill.

Sex and relationships are a lot more complicated than YOU'RE making it out to be.

[–]PiperBigBell1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]MidgetHunterxR1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Zombiespire0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Cheeseydick69694 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]thesatellite230 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]latinmax684 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]thesatellite234 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Zombiespire2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]PiperBigBell3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Vouch33r3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Zombiespire5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Vouch33r1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Zombiespire-3 points-2 points-1 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]IceBear---69-1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Title	Tips for Penetrating Virgin
Author	thesatellite23
Upvotes	1
Comments	29
Date	January 1, 2020 8:45 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/eini2y/tips_for_penetrating_virgin/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/tips-for-penetrating-virgin.304095 https://theredarchive.com/post/304095