How does Christianity affect AWALT & Hypergamy?

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September 19, 2019

Ever since I swallowed the pill a year ago, I’m becoming more jaded every day. My two biggest hang ups are with the AWALT theory and hypergamy. I’m in an awesome relationship with a God-fearing woman who I’ve vetted extensively, but all I can do is sit back with the expectation that she is going to be constantly branch swinging and will inevitably leave me for someone better no matter how Alpha I become.

The whole “she’s not yours, it’s just your turn” really gets to me and makes me not want to get married.

How does Christianity affect these “truths”?

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Title How does Christianity affect AWALT & Hypergamy?
Author Awayhethrows1961
Upvotes 3
Comments 7
Date 19 September 2019 09:03 PM UTC (1 year ago)
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Red Pill terms found in post:
alphaAWALTbranch swinginghypergamy

[–]Rifleshoot6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

AWALT and hypergamy mean that all women have those impulses, NOT that they will all act on those impulses. Let’s say that you are a fat, lazy slob as many modern men are. And your wife is a paragon of Christian virtue. Because of her belief in biblical morality, she may not leave you or cheat on you, but she will certainly be tempted to. But most women don’t have that kind of self control over the course of years and years of having a bad husband. Eventually, most women will give in to that impulse if things get bad enough.

To flip the scenario, imagine being married to a sexless, harpy of a wife for 20 years. You’ve been starved for sex for so long, and some hypothetical 20 year old HB10 starts coming into you. You are going to feel REALLY tempted to sleep with her, aren’t you? Most men would give in to that temptation, but not all men. But all men would feel that temptation.

So be attractive and don’t be unattractive and you probably will never have to worry about it. Even if chad comes along and your wife sees him, she may be attracted to him, but because she is satisfied with you, she won’t try the branch swing.

[–]Deep_Strength3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I’m in an awesome relationship with a God-fearing woman who I’ve vetted extensively

So teach her about her temptations and sin nature and see if she learns to resist temptation and follow God (and you).

It's really easy to do with the copious examples of celebrities and even family and friends that display typical sinful behavior.

The whole “she’s not yours, it’s just your turn” really gets to me and makes me not want to get married.

There's a reason why I stopped reading secular manosphere blogs more than 3-4 years ago. You should stop filling your mind with secular stuff and fill it with the Word.

[–]lololasaurus2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ever watch porn? Ever feel like pretty much everyone must watch porn? Ever struggle with that temptation?

AMALT, in this sense is probably a fair general statement .

But. You're a Christian, right?

Do you do battle with this sin? Do you experience victory over it, even if you sometimes still fall? Does Jesus love you while you are yet a sinner?

This is God working in you. He can overcome AMALT.

The working of the Holy Spirit can and does help women restrain their AWALT lusts too. That doesn't mean a Christian woman won't cheat or grievously sin. It also doesn't mean you won't. You aren't any safer from sin as a man. You just have different sins.

[–]Red-Curious0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Does your gf have an arm? Dude! My wife does too. I guess AWALT. Oh wait, God shouldn't want us to stereotype women, so we'd better just never assume that a girl we meet has an arm. For all we know, it's just a really good prosthetic.

Awkward to talk that way, right? Of course women have arms. There are general rules, and there are outliers. But there are also women with long arms/short arms; fat arms/skinny arms; dark toned arms/light toned arms; etc. The fact is, God created all women with arms. He created all women with hormones. He created all women with the purpose of helping. And when we sinned, he decreed that all women would be cursed through Eve. AWALT represents the inclinations inherent in women (whether or not they express them) that are a product of (1) creation, or (2) their sinful nature. It's that simple. The red pill figured out what those trends are through observation; we see it through reading the Bible.

Hypergamy is also a God-created phenomenon that was perverted by the fall. God designed it for good. Women perverted it for evil. But it's a sub-category within AWALT. God created all women to want to follow a capable leader (AF). The curse of the fall is that all women then want their man to be subservient to them (BB). That's hypergamy.

"she's not yours, it's just your turn"

This is a concept straight from the Bible as well. "You are not your own, you were bought with a price." We belong to Jesus. God gives others into our lives within our responsibility - our students, disciples, a wife, children, etc. They belong to God; but he gives us a turn with them, and we are to steward our time and relational energy with them in a manner best suited to advance His Kingdom.

Per the fall, this concept has become perverted. Instead of, "I'm not yours, I'm God's" it has become, "I'm not yours, I'm his." And men do this too. AWALT. AMALT - "I don't belong to my wife, especially now that my heart is really with some other woman."

The fact is, some men get to keep their turn for an entire lifetime before giving her back to God. Others get to keep her for a few years before she runs into the arms of another, before she ultimately goes back to God. But no matter how it plays out, she's on loan and is never yours to begin with.

Even under secular terms, the goal of the phrase isn't to convince men that their wives absolutely will cheat on them, which is absurd and grossly against observable reality. It's to point out to men that you don't own your wife, so stop pretending you should be able to control her every move, emotion, decision, etc. Enjoy her while you've got her, but don't wrap your entire life around keeping her by your side. If she leaves, deal with it. Oh well. But don't try to force her to do anything because you're just going to end up in her frame and digging yourself into an even deeper hole. That's it.

How does Christianity affect these "truths"?

It doesn't. The truths are a product of the way God created the world. That's like asking: "I heard we're supposed to love our neighbor. How does Christianity affect this concept of loving my neighbor?" Uuuh ... it doesn't. Christianity is the one that came up with the concept in the first place.

[–]Willow-girl0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

It's been my experience that religion seldom constrains sexual behavior. People will throw religion under the bus in a heartbeat when it conflicts with some primal urge, so I wouldn't count on Christianity to keep your girlfriend in line.

The good news it that women who are satisfied with their relationship, and understand its boundaries, are less likely to stray from the reservation, so to speak. When the grass is plenty green on your side, there's no need to jump the fence.

Also, it's important that she understands that a couple needs to erect strong walls around their marriage and to not let them be breached. You can get a sense of where a girl stands on this during the dating relationship ... does she go on flirting with other men on social media? Etc. That should be a red flag.

[–]Awayhethrows1961 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

Re: social media

I don’t think she flirts with guys on social media, but she is quite active on the apps.

Do I overtly express my expectations as far as boundaries go? For example, do I explain to her that my future wife won’t be flirting with other men?

[–]Willow-girl0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'd simply observe her behavior and decide if it's in keeping with what you're seeking in a partner.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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