I’m the type of guy who devotes a good amount of time dieting, doing cardio, shopping for fashionable outfits, and getting my hair done. Clearly my appearance matters a lot to me since it’s really something I’ve never excelled in until I hit high school. I just like putting in the effort of being good looking and well-groomed.

I’m always on the move to shape my body and a key insecurity I’ve always had is being in the wrong shape or simply not being enough to be sexually attractive.

Basically, me and this girl broke up and WE LEFT IT ON A GOOD NOTE (so I can’t see why she’d have a reason to rip on me like that; we are still friends). But she told other friends that I wasn’t impressive or something; she made fun of my body shape, the way my member looks, the photos I sent, and the effort I put into myself.

I feel absolutely hideous as a result, I don’t even want to look in the mirror nowadays, and I don’t know if I even want to have sex again if it means showing another woman my body or my look. If I’m that deficient and laughable, I don’t ever wanna go through with burdening another lady or my dignity with showing myself.

I just hate my body infinitely more now. I hate who I am; I hate the very image I define to be. Every morning my entire life I’ve always felt hideous waking up in my own skin and this is pushing me to the edge now. I’m covering up more nowadays with more coat based fashion and I can’t stand to bear myself. I’ve hated most things about myself and always struggled with self confidence; but this blow takes me hard because my body was supposed to be so private and it had effort behind it. I just feel like I’m out of things to feel proud of and I occasionally fantasize about harming myself.

I don’t know what to do? I don’t know if exercise or dieting even helps me? What’s wrong with my body?

How do I cope with this?