TRP's thoughts on improved SMV and dealing with those that ridiculed you when you were a beta male.

DRMMR76 · 2015-05-11T12:59:46+00:00

Yes. Let it go. You life is yours. Stop living it for other people. I would say you should switch school and move to a new city, or better yet, a new state. You can start fresh and be the man you know you are day 1 with none of the past baggage. But if that's not possible, just ignore them. Find a new group of people. Make some friends at the gym, or hiking, or the shooting range. One of my best buddies right now was a rival at a local 3-gun match. Shit, meet some new buddies at a LAN party. There's a couple hundred million people in the US alone. That handful of shitheads you used to know is nothing. I'm originally from Michigan. I was a hopelessly Beta and unpopular loner in high school. Now I'm 31, been on three deployments, have two degrees, make 73k a year, go shooting, hunting, camping, and 4 wheeling with army and cop buddies in my new home state of Texas. I was fat, slouched, shy, timid, and weak. Now I'm thinking about getting certified to teach Crossfit, not just do it. You can change your life as much as you choose to.

seattleron · 2015-05-11T16:13:25+00:00

The best way to deal with it is to up your SMV to a point that it's higher than the guys who fucked with you, and to a point that the women will want to fuck you.

Don't waste your time thinking of a revenge plot, but use all of that motivation to self improve to a point where they're all feeling stupid about how they treated you.

Don't ever try to bring another person down, use the motivation to bring yourself up. You will realize this the longer you've ingested TRP. Don't let another person control your emotions, you are in control of your own happiness.

absolucion · 2015-05-11T13:25:43+00:00

Let it all go. They ridiculed you but inadvertently brought about all of this positive change in your life. Throw your own parties, form your own group of friends. Stop giving a damn about other people and focus on yourself. Someone else said you hadn't yet swallowed the pill. I disagree. You just haven't done a good job of internalizing it yet.

[deleted] · 2015-05-12T03:50:11+00:00

Would you like to know my plan for all these assholes who picked on me, and girls who wouldn't give me a chance? I read.

I read a lot. I read a lot of finance. I read about how to get smarter and stronger. I put into practice all the pragmatic advice I get. I read books after books on how to build a business and network with people who are even smarter and angrier than I am. I read everything I can about POWER, MONEY, and PSYCHOLOGY. I read every single day.

Then I'm going to build a very successful, efficient, unassailable business.

I'm going to hire the very same people who thought nothing of me. They're going to work for me. They will jump when I say jump. Their assholes will tighten when I walk into a room. They are going to jump through endless hoops in hopes that I advance their career. I will own the property they can barely afford to pay rent on. I will own the shopping centers they spend their savings on. I will own the no-credit-check dealerships that repo's their luxury cars. I will own the restaurants and bars they work part time and drink at. Their kids are going to write to my scholarship foundation in hopes of a future at a college in my name. They will turn over every stone wondering when the rules changed, and I will be there smiling. Signing their paychecks.

onepill_twopill · 2015-05-11T14:59:25+00:00

Back at school for me, this was the kinda what I experienced, and those guys I didn't like seem like they are gonna do well, however, after meeting them a lot at uni, I'd say just to say high, be polite, and forget anything happened. However this is also where we need to learn politics. If they still treat you like shit indirectly, then you should also be indirect. Attack them with subtlety that they will understand, but cannot get you back for. Well at least this works for me.

trp_ocd · 2015-05-11T13:00:25+00:00

You aren't comprehending yet. Lift, hold frame, don't post and read the sidebar. Seriously. If you have to ask, you're being lazy and have not swallowed the pill.

FUCK_YEA_GLITTER · 2015-05-11T21:51:54+00:00

I think that the "While your busy thinking about what others are thinking of you, they are too busy thinking about themselves" applies in this situation.

Whisper · 2015-05-11T23:08:11+00:00

There are two reasons why men torment other men for acting beta:

To make themselves feel better by contrast.
As a last desperate attempt to make them rediscover their testicles.

The first type are weak themselves, and only appear strong by reason of being slightly less weak than their victims. A former victim, having rediscovered his testicles, has little to fear from them. They will pick easier targets.

The second type are not enemies at all, even if their attempts to help might be tactless and ill-advised.

TruthOverLiez · 2015-05-12T00:11:39+00:00

Show off your wealth and make them jealous if you're rich LOL.

iLLprincipLeS · 2015-05-11T15:27:06+00:00

while you are thinking about what happened in the past, the only moment they remember you is when you pass near them. evolve, and they will have to worry about their mistakes from the past when they will bump into you.

RunawayGrain · 2015-05-11T16:15:06+00:00

What is the best way to deal with the situation both on the outside and inside (the grudge you have)?

Been there, done that. The key is to stop worrying about impressing people that don't matter. Two years isn't really much time. try ten to fifteen years. Within five years, most of the popular guys from college / high school will be burn outs. The girls fade out much more quickly. Stick with the lifting, personal finance, and self improvement, and in ten years time you're going to have a social circle forming around you.

As for the best way to deal with it, lets go back to my small hometown: Frankenjock from high school wrecked his back playing college football. he lives across the street from my folks in an apartment above his folks garage. He's on disability and is a stay at home dad. It's always fun to pull up to their house in a Lex that costs more than his parents house is probably worth, get the LTR that's ten years younger than I am out of the passenger seat, then smile and wave to him on the way inside.

Just focus on self improvement and making the most of your opportunities.

JeanValjean197o · 2015-05-11T17:37:10+00:00

You have to decide if the risks outweigh the rewards.

Once you've built your life and can move on it seems like a bad risk to go back and get some justice from someone who hurt you in the past. Even if you win there's a chance they will call the cops and then you'll be in prison. And the only real way to "win" is to hurt them and let them know it was you who hurt them.

Just bushwhacking them or hiding behind a mask is kind of beta imo.

When I went to my 20 year class reunion I ran into one of my bully's toadies. He was with a woman in her 20's (probably a prostitute) and I confronted him for his participation in the bullying that occurred. He denied it, but after I pointed out how he participated and backed up the bully (it was always 3 on 1) then he couldn't deny it. I made him apologize to me in front of his woman and everyone we went to school with.

So, that was a pretty good revenge and I didn't have to break a sweat to do it.

I wasn't even alpha (I'm still not), but I learned how to fight and since becoming an adult whenever I've had to fight I never lost.

But this ain't a pissing contest.

It's your life and just remember, the best revenge is living well. Show up to a party with a plate on your arm or make his ex or current gf into your plate and that's another great revenge.

Or the chicks that messed with you. Pump them and dump them or spin them for awhile.

1n33d4d0774r · 2015-05-11T18:06:25+00:00

Yeah just work on trying to get over it. I see you mentioned in your post they are still cunts I'm guessing you and I would see very different on what the meaning of "having to associate" is. Imagine your health is in a bad way and you can't lift or work on improving your SMV. Do you have the time of day for these shitters anymore? Good that's how it is from now on.

Just remove them from your life as much as you can and focus on what you have already. You already worked hard to improve your SMV so just keep going and put that hate/anger they made you feel into improving yourself so you can do things they just simply aren't able to do.

nemaxofredpill · 2015-05-11T19:25:31+00:00

Use it to fuel your hate-fire in the gym.

CleverNeologism · 2015-05-11T19:56:06+00:00

The best way to deal with the situation is recast everything so that there is no grudge.

Harboring resentment is just letting people control you far past their actual dealings with you. Just think about it: 10 years later and you are still letting them fuck with your emotions. 10 years later and you are still in the mindset that these are people that you have to do something about. 10 years later and you still are replaying your school years.

Just stop. Forget about it. That you 10 years ago was a fucking moron. This you, now, isn't, and you aren't going to let those people continue to emotionally manipulate you.

crimson-hound · 2015-05-11T20:16:45+00:00

Most of those people I have either forgotten about, or don't talk to anymore. It's hard for me personally to say, because most of the people that were "cool" when I was younger got knocked up young, went to jail, or they're boozers, used up sluts, druggies etc.. They're still cool in their own little social clique, but I personally think of them as a loser instead of wanting to be party of the "cool group".

I'd say to just forget about it. It's unhealthy to hold on to a grudge for that long and the fact that you bring it up now tells me that you're not really an "alpha" like you say. You should have spent your time in that process by meeting new people and establishing new friendships and a social circle rather than dwelling on the past.

I've drastically improved since my last relationship that destroyed me and my ex is pretty happy with her boyfriend. Heard through the grapevine that they're thinking about marriage. Meanwhile, I haven't met anyone new that I want to date. I'm not bitter about that at all because I've moved on and have other things going for me in life. I got accepted to a grad program at a top school in the world for my field and will be moving from the sleepy suburbs to a metropolis. I'm looking forward to all the new people I will meet and new experiences of this move and focusing on that; not on my ex and a bitter resentment toward her happiness after our relationship. In fact, I'm kind of glad it ended cause we weren't right for each other and if we didn't break up I might not have gotten this opportunity of a lifetime and she might not have met this new guy, it was really a win-win for both of us in my eyes.

mrgogo1 · 2015-05-11T20:57:47+00:00

Our aim is to climb up the ladder, so really there should be an effort to move to a far higher quality area and really have no contact from people from the past. Old friends and acquaintances often hold you back, they keep going over the same old patterns. Moving on makes the world see you as you currently are without your previous status holding you back.

favours_of_the_moon · 2015-05-11T22:12:17+00:00

Living well is the best revenge.

If they continue to douchebag you, then you should challenge them in some way.

usku · 2015-05-12T04:38:08+00:00

Let it go. You ain't bettering yourself hanging on to a grudge over some shit that actually doesn't matter one bit.

Best case scenario, they'll always have that edge over you. Worst case it'll eat you until you break.

Let it go.

Veldashok · 2015-05-12T02:53:33+00:00

The best way to handle the situation? It depends on what you want out of the situation, and why you want it.

The reason they treated you badly before isn't really their fault. I mean, they had agency over how they treated you, for sure, but you were probably a piece of shit before, in all honesty, and in no offense. I mean, you did say it yourself: you were beta, meaning you had very little value to present as a social player in the game of social politics. I'm making assumptions here, but if you were like me: you weren't attractive, you weren't clever or funny, you weren't well connected or rich... the only value you presented to them was as a stepping stone, as validation that they were, in fact, better than you.

It feels good to dominate someone, physically, but also emotionally and socially too. They aren't evil, they didn't do it because they hate you as a person, they did it because it makes them feel good to do it. They are selfish, just like you. I mean, you want nothing more than to beat their face in, right? That feels good to you, and bad to them, and it makes you want to do it? See, you already empathize with their selfish point of view more than you probably care to admit. Sure, that you have refrained thus far makes you better, but to say you no nothing of the temptation would be a denial of the truth.

Dominance is dominance, and it sends signals to the brain that you are successful, triggering the release of more of that sweet testosterone while also bestowing the benefit of feeling more secure and less stressed in one's environment.

But to continue: everyone's a fucked up human being by your definition of it. Some of those people might have had life experiences since the time you were bullied by them and have since gotten wiser and more patient. Some of these people might have become more of a bully. But why do you owe these people anything, even your ire? Whats past is past, and nothing you can do to them will really change them. Even if you take the guy who suggests you hide out in their yard and beat them with a stick seriously, (he's lying by the way, if he really did that he wouldn't tell anyone and he certainly wouldn't come off like an ego injured douche about it), their interpretation of why that happened to them might be totally rationalized differently than how you wanted. They might just chalk it up to some crazy person who snapped and they got unlucky, they might just stroke their ego and decide that they must be pretty fucking impactful to have had an actual hit man trying to knee cap them.

Case and point: what do you get out of this mindset that they have to be taught differently? Is your ego so fragile that you can't handle that you just sucked before and so people treated you sucky, and now you don't suck anymore and now they treat you well? Are you mad that they don't think of you as special as you think of you? Doesn't that just breed weakness to you, that you want post-event emotional validation from people you now supposedly think are beneath your value? And what does that say about your supposedly alpha mindset (abundance mentality, outcome independence, machaveilien) that even tangentially associating with these people is stealing your frame away?

Given all that, why the fuck do you give a fuck? Be a true bad ass and be above your past, own your present, focus on the future, leaving behind anything that is below your fucks to give.

You should only have one fuck to give and you better be giving it to yourself, and right now it seems like you are still giving a fuck or two to your past bullies, despite that they've moved on and aren't even asking for your fucks anymore.

beachbloke · 2015-05-11T13:06:25+00:00

Stop being a baby and take ownership. You caused your ridicule, not them. You get to decide whether you're butt hurt, not them. You get to live your life the way you want to, not them.

[deleted] · 2015-05-11T16:42:21+00:00

The problem is once you have become an alpha male then you won't care. That's one of the basics of self improvement. Creating a IDGAF attitude.

So, if you are not supposed to give a fuck then why do you give a fuck?

R1fle · 2015-05-11T17:56:48+00:00

you improved your SMV to the point that you went from being beta to being an alpha male

Now inside of you, there is that grudge that is still there.

Contradicting yourself. Hypothetically, the dude is still beta.

You have to associate with these people who to some extent might be nice to you but you realize that they are some fucked up human beings. You also can't seem to completely get over the fact that they did give a tough time.

No, you don't have to associate with them. Are you not an adult? Do whatever you want, talk to whoever you want. Are you working at your dream career and these ex-bullies are your peers? Weigh whats worth more, making amends w/ ex-bullies and staying in your dream career, or finding a new better dream career? Make a big boy decision.

What is the best way to deal with the situation both on the outside and inside (the grudge you have)?

First, the dude needs to accept he's nowhere near alpha. Self improve for another 20 years. Then ask a new question.

If he asked the same question again, I'd say he needs to not give a fuck (really, the most common advice ever given on here. it's obvious as shit.), and just do whatever the fuck he wants. Talk to them if you want, don't if you don't. Invest yourself emotionally with them, or don't. It's up to you. Stop awkwardly staring at their success and focus on building your own.

Do you just let go and act like nothing happened?

Do you have the highest GPA in your program? Are you on the Dean's List? Are you volunteering in your field of study? Do you have a list of companies to apply to months before you graduate? Can you see success right in front of your fucking eyes that it's impossible to see anything else - including these people who used to bully you? No? Then don't stop self improving. Fuck.

There is an annoying guy at my work. Everytime he talks I want to shoot myself. I just preoccupy myself with productive shit to do and just do it all the time so even with my ADHD I still can't comprehend the white noise coming out of his mouth because I want a raise more than I want to hear useless jargon from some attention seeking jackass. I want that success. I'll ignore the fuck out of every obstacle until I get it. This annoying fuck isn't getting me a raise, getting shit done is. Hopefully this helps you out.

[deleted] · 2015-05-11T17:57:40+00:00

It was your own fault for being weak back then. You got up, you did something about it, and you changed things. These people that were once bullying you aren't treating you better because you have muscle now, they're doing it because they finally respect you. Let it go, think about how pathetic you were, looking back. How you yourself, in the present, would have looked down on who you once were. Use these new connections to your advantage and keep climbing that ladder.

Title	TRP's thoughts on improved SMV and dealing with those that ridiculed you when you were a beta male.
Author	soontobgrad
Upvotes	17
Comments	37
Date	May 11, 2015 12:54 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/35lajp/trps_thoughts_on_improved_smv_and_dealing_with/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/trps-thoughts-on-improved-smv-and-dealing-with.32445 https://theredarchive.com/post/32445

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