Hey AskTRP,

A year ago I discovered The Red Pill after a...pathetic breakup. Still, I really only started improving myself a few months ago.

I’ve found that, well, I still have a hard time talking to girls. A girl at work, for example, told me “Wow, you’ve really glowed up after you started lifting” and I said “Thanks” and walked away. I shit you not.

But worst of all is the fact that I for some reason resent attractive girls, or especially those I want.

I am NOT an incel, but I’ve been feeling angry at what I feel is unjust. Part of me hates that women just have to put on makeup and not be (too) fat, while men like me have to work out for months and work on game in order to get an average girl.

A lot of the girls I like - I end up telling myself - are out of my league. All of them are attractive, and I end up feeling like I’m just unable to reach them. It’s not even a physical thing. I realize that my lack of basic social skills means that my ship is already sunk. So I get hateful.

Strange enough I’ve grown to hate girls I know that are...well... sexually active. I’ve found that I’m overall very spiteful and resentful of girls who are attractive and have high n-counts. A girl who I know fucks around a lot was talking about some psychology thing and I started laughing. She got mad and was like “You don’t respect me” and I responded “You’re right, I don’t respect you”.

A few weeks earlier this girl and her friends were crying about some college thing and the only thing I could think of was “You get what you ducking deserve”. Why? Am I jealous that they can smash whoever they want? Am I jealous that other men get that before I do?

Lastly, I’ve found that I’ve begun to idealize media associated with the whole Incel thing. For some reason I’ve become very attached to two movies: Taxi Driver, and Joker. For some reason I feel like I resonate with both characters.

I hate the fact that I resent women, when I logically know that if I was in their spot, I’d do the same thing.

I guess I just want to know, how do I get out of this anger phase? And why am I jealous?

Also it’s not like i have no experience with girls. I got laid when I was 16 and have been in two LTRs. I was happier then. Why does it feel like realizing the truth is worse?