How do you not judge them?

Snowboard18 · 2020-04-01T18:49:09+00:00

Judge all you want in your head, but don’t say shit cause your just talking yourself out of sex.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2020-04-01T19:14:23+00:00

So many years ago, when I figured out that girls liked "jerks", I also figured out that I had two choices: complain that girls like jerks, or become the jerk that girls like. Choose your path accordingly.

RobbyHagan · 2020-04-01T18:49:00+00:00

Do you judge water for being wet?

Fabulous-Craft · 2020-04-01T18:47:07+00:00

Do you judge a toddler for screaming about wanting a cookie?

Women are different than men. This is their nature.

Protocol_Apollo · 2020-04-01T21:05:49+00:00

Okay so there’s two paths right?

To call it out.
To not call it out.

Path 1- you call her out.

What are the chances she’ll truly listen to you? (And not just agree in the moment and go back to what she was doing before).

What are the genuine chances of her changing her behaviour by a stranger?

Path 2- you don’t call it out.

You learn about about female nature and know why you should treat all guns like they are loaded.

And she won’t feel patronised by someone who is meant to be a cool fun guy.

Don’t try to pin your morals on other people..especially women.

i-am-the-prize · 2020-04-01T19:46:38+00:00

there is a continuum where your female acquaintances fall, left to right:

next > ignore > ons > plate > fwb > ltr > ?

women move to the right *if* you want that to happen (men control access to the relationship) and *if* they qualify for the upgrade.

so be glad they're sharing, it fills in the gaps in their sexual/relationship CV. some of it may disgust you, fine. but early info is best, and having them clarify for you what they 'qualify' for is great, then it's simply about your choice in what you want out of the 'relationship' and 'them'. so do judge their suitability, but judging "them" is pointless, other than reinforcing "awalt" and other sidebar axioms, which gets repetitive.

data = good. never complain the footfalls of the messenger that disturbs your slumber.

Tousen71 · 2020-04-01T20:53:48+00:00

You aren’t marrying those girls. You’re just fucking them. Don’t take them any more seriously than that. Save your personal feelings for girls who aren’t like that.

ModernDao · 2020-04-02T04:23:46+00:00

First let me say that if women are trusting you with this that means that she both sees you as high value, a keeper, and she trusts you. She is looking for absolution. She is looking for you to bless it all way, tell her she's a perfect being and those indiscretions don't matter because her true nature is angelic, and you are blessing her with eternal grace and granted a pass for all misdeeds. She wants you to see her without judging her, the way a loving parent would. But that's not how romantic love works, it's naivete and wishful thinking on her part. You just happen to be the beneficiary.

I have experienced what you are describing many times. I have played it several ways.

On one hand, giving voice to your authentic inner patriarchal shitlord is cathartic and liberating. She may respect your bold nature and fall in love with the devil-may-care, unafraid and unapologetic man you are at heart. The truly submissive women will do this. But that is rare. Depending on how indoctrinated she is with the snowflake sickness, she will probably wince with the pain or recoil in horror of having her snowflake worldview knicked with the sharp knife of logic and reason.

Some women like pain, and will respect your masculine frame and draw closer, as I said. That isn't many of them, in my experience. Most of those will not tolerate a long-term shitlord in their midst, even if you're giving her the best dick she's ever had or ever will have. You will remain a bittersweet memory to her long after she's cut the cord. You'll forever be the asshole with the great dick that kept making her sad. This is one way alpha widows are made.

On the other hand, you can swallow your pride, keep your inner dialog inside the confines of your head and heart. You can keep banging them until the cognitive dissonance and annoyance causes either you to lose attraction to her, or her to sense your loss of frame and lose her attraction to you, or till you inevitably find a shiny new toy to play with, and start over in this version of the prisoner's dilemma once again, fresh, with a new array of bullshit to call out or tolerate.

The only long-term solution is to see women as the flawed beings they are, love strongly but with a light grip, keep two in the kitty, and ride it until you find one you're willing to tolerate long-term, or until you get bored of the game or find Jesus, Buddha, the bottle, or the grave.

I found this weird-ass copypasta written like a bible verse and is attributed to the rapper Future. It seems to resonate:

From the streets did she emerge and to the streets she will return

And I say unto you "She is for the streets."

So be not weary when she must return from whence she came.

AnonymousSportsExec · 2020-04-02T04:51:02+00:00

My policy with my children, women, employees etc. is to reward good behavior and correct bad behavior.

Being an enabler is unhealthy and unattractive.

Women are attracted to social dominance. They are turned on by a man who calls them on their bs. Not someone who cosigns it like an agreeable little manslave.

If a woman told me a story about her leading someone on, I'd call her out. I'd tell her leading people on is harming that person and herself. That it could lead to something worse and isn't worth it.

If she doesn't want my opinion, I would just say, "Ok. I don't want to hear those type of stories. Save them for someone else."

RepresentativeMood2 · 2020-04-02T14:24:45+00:00

I have experimented with this personally and I found that some women find you more attractive after you morally call them out.

Title	How do you not judge them?
Author	skeptixon
Upvotes	0
Comments	22
Date	April 1, 2020 6:43 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/ft5ye4/how_do_you_not_judge_them/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-do-you-not-judge-them.359668 https://theredarchive.com/post/359668

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