Hi to all,

I don't know if this is a result of some mental masturbation or not, anyways.

I'm in a 1.5yr LTR with a very good girl. Few red flags. Smart, feminine etc. We're both 23 and studying.

Thing is, she's my first LTR (not first girl mind you), and although is has been very good so far.

Lately, she's been pushing for more commitment. The latest example, which leads me here is : she wants us to cohabitate. I declined. She then declared that this relationship had no purpose if it was one sided and if I didn't want to go the same route. Which is true from her perspective. She's conscious about the wall and having kids early, it's as if she went through RPW. Anyways.

We talked a bit more and here's what I told her and my propositions for her :

- From an emotional (what I want, right now) perspective : I'd like to keep her.- From a pragmatic perspective : I'd be better to move on, since she could find someone better suited to her goals and I could better improve myself.

- Propositions : Either we stay together as things were but then we're stuck in a loop in which she wants more commitment which I won't give her. Or we separate and say farewell to each other. Or we go back to being "friends" as we were (I don't want to leave her completely alone during the quarantine, she's got very few friends).

She made it clear that staying friends is not an option. Either play the game or quit it.

I don't want to hurt her nor leave her, but considering all the other factors, I'd be better to.Since she's been very good to me and she's my first LTR, I may have a "mild" case of oneitis.

Am I too scared to pull the trigger ?

EDIT^1:

Thanks for all your replies :) I'd like to have your input regarding some precisions.

- This question isn't concerning whether I'd cohabitate with her because I won't, no way. The question is whether I should trigger article 50.

- I consider that as a man, you have to be Just. Thats why I take into consideration my, and her, best interests. I understand mine, and I understand hers : I want freedom and a smooth ride (911 Targa) and she wants to rush things, as u/RabbidMan put it eloquently. She stated that she doesnt have the same time frame as me (she's in her peak, I'm not).

- I also know that I am faillable and that I have biases therefore I have to consider that I can have oneitis.
She is after all my first LTR, a girl that in all I've known for four years (LTR 1.5years), that I had time to observe and properly vet. We get along really well, have the same political opinions, have similar [broad] goals i.e. having a family, kids and so on, but once again not the same time frame. I've seriously considered her to be a good candidate to be the mother of my kids.

- There's also the sunken cost fallacy/bias. I've invested so much, from choosing her to caring for her. As a corollary of that, is an underlying lack of abundance mentality.

Although dragging this further is not the best option, I thought about giving her and myself a trial period. 2 or 3 more months, with some objecitves to fulfill.

Am I delusional ?