I wrote this many years ago, looks like it has stood the test of time:

I'm very independent = I'm going to do whatever I want, fuck you

I love trying new things = slut

Spontaneous = slut

Being in the moment = slut

I am a free spirit = biggest slut of all

I’m an easy going/laid back girl = I'll put up some token resistance, but I'm really a slut. Plus I have no idea what I want in life

Loyal = Cheater

No fuckboys = I crave fuckboys

Shy = I'm boring, don't know what I want and you'll have to do everything to entertain me

(Any mention of no one-night stands) / I am just looking for friends = I'm a full blown slut but I'm trying to lose the image of one, I will make you wait and wait while I give it away quickly and easily to other guys

I'm an outgoing person who loves to have fun and meet new people = my personality is repellent

A strong fact about me is that I am very ambitious and determined = career climber/gold digger

Enjoy the little things in life = gold digger

Looking for someone mature/independent = gold digger / provider-seeker

Looking for a good-hearted man = Looking for a provider but cruel, heartless men are what really wet my panties

(Starts profile off talking about her job or school) = My life is lonely and empty

I love life = My life is lonely and empty

I'm blunt = I'm going to say the wrong thing at the wrong time and make you look bad but fuck you I'm going to do it anyway

My friends/family/child(ren) mean a lot to me = be prepared to be #11 on my Top 10 list

I'm a unique individual = I'm the most generic and boring girl you will ever meet

Thought I would give this online dating thing a try = I'm desperate

I am looking for a serious relationship = I'm desperate

I love having fun & being adventurous = I am boring and you will have to do everything to entertain me

I love to laugh = I am boring and you will have to do everything to entertain me

I am confident = I am a complete bitch

I'm down to earth = I am a complete bitch

I have a great personality = I'm a complete bitch plus I'm boring

I'm a pretty simple girl = you will be expected to read my mind and pay dearly if you get it wrong

No drama = lots of drama

Where are all the real men = I'm trying to date way above what I bring to the table and no one is biting

I don't like writing about myself / I don't know what to say = I have no idea who I am or what I want