~ archived since 2018 ~
Popular
Other
RobbyHagan
[removed]
[–]strikethrough12311 points12 points13 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Perfect example of how not to talk to women.
[–]RobbyHagan[S] 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Please explain. I'd love to hear this.
[–]1jojojijo3332 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Explaining yourself to your wife has multiplied your loss
[–]RobbyHagan[S] 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Owning your mistakes are not the same as explaining yourself.
[–]strikethrough1232 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You forgot the part where everybody claps at the end. Trust me, I was there.
[–]ugluk12 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
I don't believe any of this. Then again, I'm single, lol. AFAIK, the theory goes, that you shouldn't allow shit tests from wives. Maybe I got it wrong?
[–]_do_not_read_this_2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Women test men's frame.
It's what they do.
It's not that you "allow" them to do it; it's second nature with them.
You should welcome them, it means the woman is still attracted to you and wants to see your dominance. Women want a man with a strong frame, but they don't just surrender to the first guy that comes along and passes a shit test.
Marriage is not some miracle sure for shit tests. That's why they say "Marriage is TRP on hard-mode"
[–]RobbyHagan[S] -1 points0 points1 point 6 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
I'm not here to convince anyone about my life's stories. I post them as guides/lessons for anyone who finds value in them. Wives will test you. I guarantee Rollo Tomassi's wife tests him. There isn't a woman out there who isn't going to test your boundaries from time to time to make sure that you're still in control. That's a woman's nature.
[–]ugluk10 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Wifing a woman up is a privilege, some of them never find a husband. So you need to provide, perform and get shit tested on top of that? It seems like a bad deal.
[–]RobbyHagan[S] 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I think the confusion is we're talking about two different types of tests.
Women aren't robots, they are humans and humans are flawed. If you think you're going to find a perfect angel that plays her part and never fucks up, then you've definitely got another thing coming. Many of these guys that brag about their perfect women, or their perfect lives, are just giving you the highlights. It takes work to be the man, that's why so many fail. It takes work for a woman to be a good woman, and that's why it's so rare.
In my situation, I admit that the fault was mine. I was having a moment of weakness. I was showing Beta traits and she decided to play with her food. That's what happens if you let up. You can't be a Beta dude and expect your woman to treat you like a King.
[–]ugluk10 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
If you look at how many women fail to even provide for themselves, then it follows, that being a provider is not easy. Then the burden of performance and shit tests. Should one even try to pass them, or close the wallet a little?
It depends on the situation. If your wife is pushing boundaries, your words should suffice. "Hey, I want those dishes done by tonight." And that's it. If she still doesn't do them, then you can close the wallet a little to remind her that you're not fucking around.
The problem with human nature is we get comfortable. When everything is running smoothly for so long, people tend to get relaxed. Unfortuantely, that leads to somebody stepping out of line.
I think you're concerned that these 'tests' are going to be a problem often. Like I said, I've been married for 10 years. We've had some ups and downs, but 9 times out of 10, the downs were my fault. I was a Beta who took control of his life, but nobody changes overnight, so I've had moments of regression. It is something I struggle with from time to time (less and less each year) but I can't blame my wife for acting out when I act like a bitch.
The point of my post is that you can't break. If you become a leader, then you have to maintain your leadership status. My wife wouldn't have tested me had I not acted Beta. So, you don't have to worry about her testing you if you keep your frame strong. She might rarely test you then or never, I don't know because I admit that I've had moments of weakness. I believe everyone does, but that's just my belief.
[–]CrimsonSultan0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Many of these guys that brag about their perfect women, or their perfect lives, are just giving you the highlights.
basically this. best part is when they fervently defend their perfect woman, that she is "different" because "not all women are like that".
we all know how that one ends.
[–]taway_pr2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You failed the test not once but twice...
[–]Fabulous-Craft1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
This is actually a blue pill example.
Never communicate overtly with women.
[–]RobbyHagan[S] -4 points-3 points-2 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
This is silly what you just said. Being overt is the goal. Blue pilled guys would resort to passive-aggressive tactics, or say something like, "I feel...." or "It hurt my feelings when.." I did man's work. I owned my mistake and corrected it. If you find that blue pilled then I feel bad for you son.
[–]Fabulous-Craft1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Your goal should be overt nothing more. "I want those dishes done".
Instead what you've done is revealed that you aren't really a man you just pretend to be one. You can own and correct your mistake without bringing attention to it and explaining your rationale.
Women want your actions and masculinity to be organic, not acted out like a play because you read about it online.
[–]RobbyHagan[S] -3 points-2 points-1 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Thanks for the marriage advice. You let me know how that works out for you when you get married.
[–]taptaptapheadshot0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I don't understand what does your insecurity have to do with not washing dishes??? Like why do you even connect those two things and the worst why does she do the same...
[–]RobbyHagan[S] -1 points0 points1 point 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
There is some confusion most likely because I am leaving out some details to the story because it's my personal life. I thought I gave enough information. The dishes are a result of the disagreement we had. during the disagreement, I "failed" to maintain my frame, and therefore, out of anger from the disagreement, she didn't feel like doing the dishes. I didn't call her on it, and so she left them until I did.
[–]taptaptapheadshot2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Ok I get it but I think keeping the house clean should be above any arguments
[–]RobbyHagan[S] -2 points-1 points0 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Let me know how that goes when you're living with someone for 10 years. Arguments develop over stupid shit, but they are usually rooted in a more serious underlying issue, in this case, my failure of leadership was the problem, and leaving the dishes was a symptom of the larger issue.
[–]nickdimitrov0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
When talking to women, less is more. You need to be explicit about the boundaries you set, but it's unnecessary to verbalize the dynamic between yourself and a woman - it leaves nothing for her imagination and makes her process the whole thing rationally, instead of emotionally. Most women don't even have any conscious idea of what they're doing, and even if they are, they are unlikely to admit it, so it's a fool's errand to bring attention to shit-tests and discuss them explicitly.
Given, it's true that women always shit-test you, but it's foolish to verbally identify tests as such - it shows her that you notice and care, when really it's better to treat them on the surface as if they are just some unserious and unimportant joke (you have more important things to take seriously), while at the same time, implicitly and smoothly dealing with what it really is - a shit-test.
You need to be explicit about the boundaries you set, but it's unnecessary to verbalize the dynamic between yourself and a woman
There is nothing wrong with verbalizing the dynamic between myself and my woman. Go watch some Patric O'neal. All he does is verbalize the difference between himself and his woman.
it's true that women always shit-test you, but it's foolish to verbally identify tests as such
It is not foolish to identify tests as such. I encourage people to blatantly call out people on their bullshit. It cuts right through the games and gets to the point.
when really it's better to treat them on the surface as if they are just some unserious and unimportant joke
This doesn't apply to your wife. It would be a lie to treat her like she's an unimportant joke when I already wifed her up. The game changes a little when you're married. I can't just drop her like a plate when the courts are involved, but I have to let her know that I am willing to walk that route if necessary, but there's no way I can pretend like I didn't raise her status above a plate when I put a ring on it. You're giving me single guy game. We're not playing on the same field
[–]nickdimitrov2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Patrice is a cool guy, and really wise, but he's not a god. Everyone has flaws in their approach.
It's the single biggest issue I've found with Patrice's game - that he was always trying to explain to women how they think. To be fair, he made a career out of it, but the approach does not translate well into reality. He was doing it for his buddies and the audience, not because he was changing the women. To change the women within a community, you change the community. Women biologically reject any understanding that does not service their goals. You accomplish nothing by explaining to a woman how she works, because even if anything sticks, she's not going to magically change her behavior based on it. She doesn't want to act on knowledge that she sees no benefit in implementing.
Calling people out on their bullshit is crucial, but doing so is not about having discussions or indulging others in their games. You simply tell. Explaining will not make a woman "understand things better" - that's not how women operate.
You basically say: "I see you're doing this. Stop doing it." Period. That's how you set boundaries and call out people.
When they respond: "But I was doing A and B, because of X and Y," you shut them down and you end the discussion:
"I'm not asking you what you have done and why, I'm TELLING you what you have done and why. Now stop doing it." Done. A cardinal mistake is to demonstrate to a woman that you believe her words at face value. The reason women are attracted to male rationality in the first place is because in theory we're "not supposed" to fall for justifications, rationalizations, courtesies, platitudes, excuses, explanations, moralization, etc. A woman loves a man that she feels can understand and protect her from her emotions and excuses better than she can. Women. Love. Certainty.
Everyone has flaws in their approach.
Yup. Even TRP.
I stand by my decisions in this situation. I have been married to this woman for 10, almost 11 years and I know what I'm doing. I wonder how many people in this comment section are even married? I don't need marriage advice from people who are still in the dating game. We're not playing on the same field
© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.created by /u/dream-hunter
[–]strikethrough12311 points12 points13 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]RobbyHagan[S] 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]1jojojijo3332 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]RobbyHagan[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]strikethrough1232 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]ugluk12 points3 points4 points (8 children) | Copy Link
[–]_do_not_read_this_2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]RobbyHagan[S] -1 points0 points1 point (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]ugluk10 points1 point2 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]RobbyHagan[S] 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]ugluk10 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]RobbyHagan[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]CrimsonSultan0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]taway_pr2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Fabulous-Craft1 point2 points3 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]RobbyHagan[S] -4 points-3 points-2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Fabulous-Craft1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]RobbyHagan[S] -3 points-2 points-1 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]taptaptapheadshot0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]RobbyHagan[S] -1 points0 points1 point (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]taptaptapheadshot2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]RobbyHagan[S] -2 points-1 points0 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]nickdimitrov0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]RobbyHagan[S] -1 points0 points1 point (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]nickdimitrov2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]RobbyHagan[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link