Are there any incentives for men to stay in a relationship with a woman? (r/dating_advice)

ArtoriusXv · 2018-03-11T16:39:04+00:00

[deleted]

Xein · 2018-03-11T16:49:15+00:00

10/10 post, imo.

Fabianstrategy1 · 2018-03-11T17:55:19+00:00

[deleted]

bastardstepchild · 2018-03-11T21:05:20+00:00

Yep, married guy here. Nothing I ever do makes her happy. The best I can hope for is she’s less pissed off at me than she usually is. Sex is nonexistent, but honestly I don’t fucking care any more. She put on 80 pounds and refuses to shave (but of course she demands oral). She also follows me around everywhere making sure I’m not watching porn. For this sacrifice I get to hear her complain constantly that I don’t give her enough attention and that she’s bored and I’m not entertaining her.

wathon2 · 2018-03-11T19:07:56+00:00

There is no down side to marriage for a woman, which is why so many are desperate to get married.

You can become a fat, ugly, lazy, bitchy prude and your husband can't leave you w/o losing half his shit and pay you alimony/child support. What a deal.

Maybe I should clarify: There is no down side to marriage if she married a RICHER man. And this is why marriage rate is declining as more and more women are making the big bucks. Women are simply incapable of loving unconditionally.

-Fender- · 2018-03-11T19:17:20+00:00

Nobody really had a decent answer either, I think cause everyone knows the answer is no.

maggot_brain79 · 2018-03-11T21:13:40+00:00

Literally the only reason to be with a woman now is sex. They don't cook, clean, bear children and take care of said children. They also don't provide emotional support, they only do so when they're trying to extract resources from you and once that task is complete it's back to being cold, distant, resting bitch face mode. Their personalities are now so very abrasive that living with them is a fruitless endeavor.

Then if you consider the facts that most of them used up their sexual market value long ago, most of them are terrible at sex [dead starfish mode], and that sex is becoming more and more dangerous due to STDs and regret is rape logic, plus the fact that if you happen to impregnate her you'll be taken for all that you have. That makes sex not even worth it.

The only winning move is to not play. The game is rigged. Women stand to benefit alone, and men get virtually no benefits from marriage.

Think about it. A woman marries a guy. She gets emotional support, financial support, children, and she can still be a complete bitch and fuck around with other men and society will still back her. If she's unhappy, she divorces the guy, gets alimony and child support ontop of state/federal benefits for food stamps, housing, healthcare, etc. She'll also get the house and full custody and maybe your car, probably many of your treasured possessions.

What's the man get? 0. A big fat goose-egg. He gets the privilege of possibly being homeless, losing his car, losing his job because he can't get to work, paying out a shit-ton of money in child support and alimony, and if he can't pay his support he loses his license and then might get the dubious honor of spending some time in prison.

They've got section 8 housing, free healthcare and food stamps/WIC for women who can't support their kids. What do they have for men who can't support their kids? Jail. I guess you still get three hots and a cot and medical care while in jail, though. Who knows? Maybe you'll meet some bros there.

BoobToArmRatio · 2018-03-11T22:38:49+00:00

Look at this bullshit--"None. The companionship, friendship, great sex, laughs, traveling, strong emotional connection, having someone care for you and caring for someone; all terrible. A big zero."

They dont do any of this shit! Sex gone after one year. friendship companionship both are better with a male friend. They dont fucking care about you just what you can provide. Travel? they hate the outdoors, have fun paying for every single aspect of traveling too.

NO FUCKING reason to have a relationshit.

2018-03-11T17:32:05+00:00

Male mother need, sex, wanting a family, and battling loneliness. Those are the promises at least. We know that they are usually not fulfilled. The guys most likely to have decent relationships, for longer at least, are high value men that usually don't open up, etc. Sensitive men in the bottom 80% are usually treated pretty poorly.

That's all I can come up with right now.

Datguyagain201 · 2018-03-11T22:16:57+00:00

Actually men get more out of relationships than women. That’s why women initiate divorce more. Also research has found married men are happier than single men and married women are more miserable

Hahahahaha.

2018-03-11T22:25:05+00:00

Men are waking the fuck up. And he's absolutely right of course. Women want men to conform to their standards. Which are subjective and solipsistic at best.

Something the Red Pill teaches you. If she stops desiring sex with you. Which will happen. Speaking about it will ensure drama and a downhill spiral of bullshit just for bringing it up. Yet, if women bring this up, they must be heard and WILL be heard.

Thus relationships in 2018 do not serve men. Certainly, she gets into them to further her own self-interested fantasies and resources.

Women in relationships will slowly break you down. As per the betatisation process. Ever had a woman belittle you and disrespect you? That's the norm in LTRs. Fuck that men. Take back your dignity and go your own way.

Monsieur_Valjean · 2018-03-11T20:02:47+00:00

He essentially summarised the entire premise of "The Manipulated Man" in one post.

zubbs99 · 2018-03-11T21:23:03+00:00

Any remaining incentives vanished decades ago. Long before that, there was a time when men could at least feel some pride in their status as head of household. It was still a raw deal overall, but somewhat more balanced. There was a certain respect afforded to them back then, which somewhat tempered all the typical heavy burden of responsibilities.

Nowadays, although still expected to take care of all the same work, you're stuck having to help your wife with all the domestic chores (because she's a strong "independent" woman out there "working" too), while still having to the tough dirty jobs (without help of course) - but your status is diminished, and any gratitude once shown you is gone.

2018-03-11T21:03:09+00:00

Society requires beyond all things that men never cease to pursue NAWALT unicorns. It needs men to over produce to fund women and children and if you never find a unicorn, or get divorced tough luck no guarantees were made.

Time to focus on the simple pleasures in life you can provide yourself everyday. Produce only what you need. Withdraw, find equanimity.

ProgrammaticallyMeal · 2018-03-11T16:49:22+00:00

NondeductibleWays · 2018-03-11T21:33:00+00:00

That guy is scratching the surface and asking the right questions. If he listens to people like the ones responding, he'll never find his way here like I did, which was a major stroke of luck.

TryDoingSomethingNew · 2018-03-12T02:41:57+00:00

From that post:

"Actually men get more out of relationships than women."

This is the biggest bunch of hogwash I've ever read, I think. Next they will be saying the moon is made of cheese.

That amount of naivety and stupidity to post such a comment is mind-boggling.

The whole post was about exactly the opposite. This is easily disproven by simple common sense and everyday experiences.

Honestly, sometimes the stupidity level of some people makes my head hurt.

ZealousMathematician · 2018-03-11T17:05:41+00:00

A few betas in the article.

2018-03-11T17:11:36+00:00

rationalthought314 · 2018-03-12T00:32:38+00:00

It's a good question that has me scratching my head. With the amount of entitlement and feminist crap swirling around other than sex which could easily be bad (but of course you're fault because you're not the chad she wants to fuck like a sex-crazed whore) modern women don't bring much good to the table. What they bring is emotional baggage from previous relationships, debts, drama, distractions, nagging, infidelity, potential #metoo allegations that could cause you to be ostracized or jailed. You're better off getting a dog and hiring escorts or going monk mode.

Fabianstrategy1 · 2018-03-12T02:57:05+00:00

I love that they're alamo strategy is just ad-hominems and personal attacks, not one person gives a good reason like say "she could do 50% of the housework, or help raise your children, or take care of you when your ill, or be a confidant.

TyrannicalWill · 2018-03-12T03:17:43+00:00

I personally feel that women don't bring anything to the table, in a relationship. And most modern relationships cater to women and their happiness anyway.

Yup, men's reward is the love hormone, an internal drug which lures men to women. Women don't do anything for this, they simply exist.

On the other hand, men have to work in various forms for a persistently unsatisfied woman to "prove" he loves her in all of these forms.

At the end of the day, it's the man proving he has the resources and dedication to provide for a family. That's why tradcucks and women are in the same stratum in relation to MGTOW.

stringedbeams · 2018-03-12T03:40:16+00:00

so much to be said on these kind of things but the tradcon Christian understanding was sex was only for marriage, but in marriage it was a sin for the woman to deny the man sexual relations unless for some medical or serious reason. And on the flip side married couples were supposed to be open to having a bunch of kids and not using contraception. I never imagined women were rebelling against these rules so much: the wives are supposed to submit to the men, women submit to men, so some if not all feminism itself is probably a sin. I need to lay a lot of these things out because there seems to be a lot of recurring rebellion going on and a lot of confused guys that don't understand that these women are rebelling and what they are doing is not normal or acceptable and that many of the women should be ashamed of themselves. (There needs to be an effective counter-shaming at some point, but not excessive, I think shame is harmful for either gender in certain doses. Still, some kind of ostracism might reinforce various rules).

I do think a lot of tradcons would be forced to be MGTOW today because many women are rebellious feminists, and you can try to enforce these rules via shaming but they might just rebel and therefore you'd need to stay away from them

gerar556 · 2018-03-12T05:47:58+00:00

So did he become MGTOW?

NotLuceBree · 2018-03-12T10:57:54+00:00

By Jorge, he's figured it out.

I fucking LOVE the comments.

Every single one of them operates from the assumption that something is wrong with HIM, and not with women as a whole. The mental gymnastics he's trying to put himself through is the exact same shit that COUNTLESS guys put themselves through.

They wonder why, if they supposedly "love" this girl, they don't actually want her around most of the time. They don't even know if they REALLY even LIKE her all that much. They would rather be alone or chilling with their boys, but they've been socialized to obey and pedestalize women their whole fucking life, and thus--being good guys at heart--they feel GUILTY for not liking their ultimately unlikable partner.

Motherfuckers tie themselves in KNOTS because they don't "feel" their relationship like they think they're supposed to. They feel empty inside because, as the OP points out, they spend most of their time attending to HER happiness and never evaluating his own. And when he really thinks about it, he's NOT happy, and he feels GUILTY for not being as happy as SHE is. Or seems to be. At that particular moment.

The OP has learned what I told my last LTR: relationships, as conventionally understood in many Western cultures today, are inherently emasculating, and, especially once the honeymoon phase is over, of scarce benefit to the man.

"Great sex, laughs, emotional connection, travels, all terrible things", went the gist of one snarky comment.

Typical shit.

Without RP knowledge I would never have understood that this horseshit comment could ONLY have been written by a typically narcissistic and solipsistic woman, who completely ignored all the OPs insightful and uniquely male complaints and insulted him from her OWN uniquely FEMALE worldview.

"Companionship, love, great sex, emotional connection", blah blah blah. They fail to understand that outside of sex they are usually fucking TERRIBLE at all the other shit, from a male perspective. And eventually the SEX goes away too.

Regarding women, men need to begin to ask themselves "would I accept this behavior from a male peer?"

And once they do, at that point for women--

TimesUp

BananaWilly · 2018-03-11T22:39:57+00:00

Short answer: no. Long answer: no.

Rent-a-woman solves man 'needs'.

2018-03-12T07:39:36+00:00

We already know the answer /u/JUMBOJUICYPRAWNS

Viver_Enola · 2018-03-13T03:38:01+00:00

He go to the wrong sub, lol. Should post it here.

PrefixKitten · 2018-03-12T04:27:41+00:00

To me the only incentive that either side should have is to be around somebody that you just enjoy being around.

It only occurs when the woman wants it - basically, the man just needs to wait till she wants it, to have sex. It's almost never the other way around. (I'm talking from personal experience here:) When she's not in the mood for it, there's nothing I can do.

I'm making an assumption here but do people that say things like this just go and ask straight up? Because that's not how sex usually works... I mean yeah, you do need to ask beforehand, but by the time you ask it should be totally obvious that the answer is going to be 'yes' and you ask just to be sure.

I don't really know how other people approach that sorta thing though so I'm just speaking from my own experience.

Title	Are there any incentives for men to stay in a relationship with a woman? (r/dating_advice)
Author	Bitsoft
Upvotes	181
Comments	64
Date	March 11, 2018 4:36 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/83nrvw/are_there_any_incentives_for_men_to_stay_in_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/are-there-any-incentives-for-men-to-stay-in-a.582809 https://theredarchive.com/post/582809

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