Suicidal Oneitis

syneiix · 2016-05-10T12:21:31+00:00

Hey dude, I'm sorry to hear that.

Read "Confessions of a Reformed Incel", Even twice. I think it will help you. You really need to cut this gaming thing. Start eating good, Go lift! Go and meet new people. There are so many women out there, Why do you let one destory you? But it's no biggie. You're only 23, Your whole life is ahead of you. Go and get some productive habits for yourself. Quit gaming. It really a gives you nothing.

I've been there, Before TRP. Had crazy Oneitis for a girl. It's really about realizing that you come first, No pussy is worth more than you. Remember that at all costs. Stop gaming, Said that like 3 times but once you stop you will also forget about this girl. I mean, I think you haven't met her. Why should you even care? She is just someone you chatted online with. That ends there. Realize that and forget about her. Go lift, Find hobbies, Meet new people. Take for yourself man and don't worry much, You will be fine.

BlueWeakness · 2016-05-10T14:11:16+00:00

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Deapluv · 2016-05-10T16:15:02+00:00

Fantastic advice from all the other posters here. Not much to add.

OP I can echo the advice to slow down. Acknowledge that your body, brain, and hormonal systems have been damaged by abuse and you need to repair them. This is why you felt addiction to cocain, addiction to video games, and addiction to online chat with this girl. Acknowledge that these are powerful, but illusionary, ways your brain gets tricked and hooked.

Your #1 job is to heal your body and learn to generate seratonin and other hormones from positive action, not negative or addictive actions.

This is why other posters are recommending the gym, making friends in real life, getting out in nature, developing a hobby whose sole purpose is to play with real world creativity, like music or martial arts.

I also highly recommend the book "the ultramind solution" and that you follow the 30 day detox in there to continue to clear out your physiology and get your brain on track. Also "mans search for meaning" to help you find purpose through dark days

Stick in there buddy. Please come back in 2 months and give a progress report. You may just inspire someone who needs to hear your story.

mordanus · 2016-05-10T16:37:07+00:00

I began talking to a girl online who fell madly in love with me

First off.... this is bullshit. She didn't fall in love with you. She used you for more validation and attention. When you became clingy or wanting more she figured you were more trouble than you were worth and got the "creepy guy" status and were blocked.

The fucked up part about depression like what you've got is that it limits your vision. You see only one path in life and if it doesn't work then you feel like all hope is lost. Everything you wanted is gone so what's the point. It makes you feel powerless as a result.

When I get like this, I do a brain storming session and try to think of something else out there that I feel is worth my time to work towards. Maybe the hurt is too strong right now to seek the attention of another girl so what else would you like to do? Is there another country you want to visit? Is there a hobby you want to try? What about a skill you wanted to learn. Allowing this girl to take your future away is exactly the opposite of where you want to be in life. You aren't powerless. You aren't over. In fact when you realize that you aren't stuck to this path you become free. Free to be whatever the hell you want to be. For right now though you are letting a manipulative girl that you haven't even met, define you. Pick your own path

2016-05-10T14:46:28+00:00

You are not lost or defeated. You need to slow up here. Slowwwwww up. Breathe. The only thing, the only person you need to take care of right now is you. Forgive yourself. Allow yourself to just be alone.

Dark times hit all of us. Most of us have suffered the oneitis. It's ok to be in dark times. You of course should be ghosting her completely. That is one action you can take so that she will have no control over you whatsoever.

Take care to delete everything about her, from her. I mean everything. Leave no trace of her in your contacts. It certainly worked for me.

I won't tell you that it won't hurt. But I can tell you that the pain subsides. And you will become stronger.

And go read Illimitable Men's Monk Mode. Now is your time to embrace being alone. In this time the darkness is your friend.

TRP117 · 2016-05-10T15:03:26+00:00

A lot of guys here are going to say that you're crazy for being infatuated with a girl across the world, and that you should correct that behavior.

The truth is, the path from your current low point in your life to a independent man will not be easy.

The First thing you need to do is go to the gym. I don't care if you squat, bench, use a fucking machine, just get a membership. It's like what? 10 dollars? Find something that's not going to help you in life and stop paying for it and start going to the gym. Just get inside and exercise something.

Step 2 is being more social. Stop trying to meet girls online. Just stop. When I was younger I tried that. The issue is the connection isn't real. It's just words on a screen. You think you're turning her on but you're not. It's all fake and it's a crutch. The amount of time you need to invest compared to the return on investment is crazy.

Go out in the real world. Don't do any PUA shit. Just talk to people. There's a old 30 day challenge thats similar. Find that thread and do what they suggest. Don't just limit yourself to attractive girls. Talk to everyone you can. If the conversation goes well, get a number.

While I never got to your point in life, in high school I was on the verge of a mental breakdown. Girls didn't even see me, guys didn't give a shit about me, until I started giving a shit about myself. Put yourself first. Fuck girls, fuck the friends who abandoned you, take care of yourself and you'll get more from other people anyway.

BlackJ1 · 2016-05-10T15:49:35+00:00

Man, I can't believe there are men out there who are just like pre-TRP.

Look OP, if you are searching for some magic pill to somehow make oneitis disappear you are not going to find it. It's going to stay with you for awhile, however there are ways to make it fade away faster such as talking with other women.

Find some hobbies other than gaming, go workout, fix your diet, and improve and you should start feeling better.

RunawayGrain · 2016-05-10T17:49:17+00:00

Hey guy, I'm sorry you are having to deal with this.

Here is the number for the suicide prevention hotline. They will have someone who can get you help:

1-800-273-8255

Realize that your value is not determined by another person, but by yourself. God bless, and I hope you get help.

CrazyHorseInvincible · 2016-05-10T19:42:10+00:00

Please repost in /r/asktrp

Title	Suicidal Oneitis
Author	BlueWeakness
Upvotes	4
Comments	14
Date	May 10, 2016 11:27 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/4ioqzf/suicidal_oneitis/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/suicidal-oneitis.58318 https://theredarchive.com/post/58318

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