Anyone got stories? Because boy oh boy..I have one for you..

This happened a couple of hours ago. I was invited to New Year’s Eve party. I didn’t know one of my ex’s got invited but it is what it is. Now this particular ex of mine, considers me her “Main Ex”, if you know what I mean. “The one that got away” type of ex, according to her.

Anyway. The party was great. We had a good time. And you know...it just happened..my ex and I just started talking again.

Host hands her a double shot whiskey, she willingly accepted it,

Me: “I thought you were going to continue that 10 year streak of not drinking...” Her: “Today is different. I moved out of my ex fiancé’s apartment..and you know..left the engagement ring on the table” Me: “Wait you were engaged? Wtf happened..?” Her: “It’s a long story but Can I Take a sip from your drink, I think I need another one” Host heard her, and proceeded to give her a 2nd double shot. Her: “I’ve just..you know..had it..” shows me her phone with 30 missed calls from her ex fiancé

She proceeded to talk to me about her ex fiancé. The typical super saiyan SIMP. She’s now half way through her 3d double shot btw.

Her: “Are you taken by the way? I’m sorry I’ve been talking too much about my problems”. Me: “Nah just waiting for the right one”. Her: “What do you mean the right one?” Me: “If a sugar momma came a long with a lot of money, yeah I’ll probably settle with that”.

This is the point where she flipped the switch and is now on her 5th double shot whiskey.

She proceeded to tell me all the things that I did wrong. So many rhetorical insults that I was left defenseless lol. The host became the mediator because her rants and raves attracted everyone’s attention and She’s half way through her 6th double shot whiskey..

Her: “I think you cheated because you left me on October 13, blah blah blah”... Her: “Then on October 17, blah blah blah..I saw a Facebook post of you holding hands with another girl..blah blah blah”. Host: “Wait, how did you know the date and time stamp”. Her: grabs MY hand and looks at the host “BECAUSE I LOVED HIM SO MUCH. AND HE MEANT EVERYTHING TO ME. AND I WAS DEVASTATED”. Her: Starts crying Host: looks at me, and is trying to hold his laughter Me: speechless Her: went to the bathroom to throw up

She came back again. She insulted me again. Her: “What was the purpose of this small talk huh?! I don’t want to be with you again!” Me: “I didn’t want to-“ Her: “My neighbor has been so nice to me...blah blah blah”.

She then proceeded to put her neighbor on the pedestal. A much older man, who has been her second super simp. She claimed he is the one she will marry but We all know where this “nice guy” talk is going fellas...

The rest of night..she just basically blacked out. Just got home now and is still in disbelief LOL. What a start to 2020. What a damn start.