So, when I was 15, I met this guy through common friends at a group outing. The sexual tension was immediate and we spent the entire day messing with each other. By the time we all went home, everyone could already see there was something between us. We spent the next 2 or 3 days talking to each other by text and on the phone till like 5 AM and there was clear romantic interest on both sides. I did fall in love with that guy very quickly. In fact, he is the only boyfriend I have had who I'd say I have been in love with. He was some sort of junior firefighter, hence very built and at that age, a guy who appeared so virile made me completely swoon. I also was really in lust with him and we could barely be alone in a room without dry humping.

Anyway, after two months as a couple, we decided to go fully physical. Out of the two of us, I actually was the one who was NOT a virgin, but he is the one who did push for it (because his parents were absent that one day) while I was a bit hesitant I first. I finally agreed and the day it happened, it started out great at first and I'll be honest, at now 21, I still look back at us naked, cuddling and kissing as the most tender of moment of my life. Then, came the moment for penetration. Oh my... First of all, I had noticed he was significantly under average in terms of size but you know, I was in love and did not care. I was also puzzled that he was only half hard when I undressed him but thought he would be ready by the time we had to do the deed. He wasn't. We tried to kinda force his way inside. Impossible. In the end, it turned out he was very efficient at pleasuring a woman with his fingers so I did not hold it against him.

After that, something shifted in our relationship. I kept wanting us to have some kind of physical relationship, even without penetration but he seemed to become more and more reluctant. In the end, I think this contributed to the end of our relationship 5 months in. He ended up dumping me for one of my friends, even though he seemed to have no initial interest in her, just because he learned she was into him and was some virgin wallflower (who he hence assumed would not have expectations of performance).

For years, I have believed he had some sort of performance anxiety due to being a virgin and having an attractive more experienced girl in his bed. But now that I am part of this sub, I am starting to wonder if all along, it was not due to a porn addiction I knew nothing about. I mean, he was rather jumpy about me being near his phone (even though I am pretty positive until the very last week, he was not talking to other girls). And he also was not too into the idea of eating me out for some reason. So FDS, what do you think it was? Underage porn addiction or just immaturity?