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Ms_Tilly Archive

View 41 posts and 4,513 comments by Ms_Tilly on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
3076

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 02:15 PM
1151

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/19 04:26 AM
1142

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/20 05:08 AM
1104

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/12/19 05:58 PM
580

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 02:33 PM
460

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/20 06:54 PM
447

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/20 05:47 PM
407

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/20 07:27 PM
386

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/19 12:09 AM
365

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/20 09:50 PM
303

LIES MEN TELLMs_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 02:07 AM
271

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/19 05:06 AM
155

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/19 05:11 AM
152

QUEEN SH*TMs_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/12/19 11:02 AM
146

TRIGGER WARNINGMs_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 04:55 PM
142

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/20 10:21 PM
104

QUEEN SH*TMs_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 05:43 PM
96

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/20 05:41 PM
93

RED FLAG 🚨Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 04:04 PM
78

ROAST-A-SCROTEMs_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/20 03:02 AM
77

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/20 11:09 PM
76

PICKMEISHA HALL OF FAMEMs_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/20 04:10 PM
71

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 02:44 AM
68

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 09:04 AM
61

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/20 05:54 PM
58

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/19 02:01 PM
53

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/20 04:34 AM
51

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/20 01:28 AM
49

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 08:48 AM
45

PORN SICK, LIMP DICKMs_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/19 12:09 AM
40

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/19 07:48 PM
36

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/19 02:04 PM
36

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/19 11:02 PM
35

MALE DEPRAVITYMs_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/20 03:11 PM
32

ROAST-A-SCROTEMs_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/19 04:27 PM
31

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/19 03:30 AM
31

ROAST-A-SCROTEMs_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/20 11:15 AM
28

RANTMs_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/12/19 04:32 AM
20

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 10:10 PM
20

FIELD REPORT Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/19 03:38 PM
16

Ms_Tilly/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/19 10:03 PM
Showing the 1,000 most recent of 4,513 comments.
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
22

Exactly!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 05:38 PM
26

I've mentioned this before, but I learned to yawn with my mouth mostly closed or covered because boys or men always made disgusting comments.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 07:57 PM
5

I've been on my own since 17 and I have never not kept my homes picked up. I've lived with a few men and at least half of them I had to constantly pick up after. I remember I stayed living with an ex for convenience and he became very passive aggressive. I went on vacation and came home to a dried cat puke right in the hallway. He didn't clean it because they are MY cats. He ended up doing some really wild shit and I'm so glad I never have to see him again. I took pics of one guy's house I dated…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/20 02:26 PM
108

I dated someone who's apt looked very much like this because every minute he wasn't at work was spent gaming on his computer. He waited until I was invested to let his apt go back to its normal state. When I realized what kind of man I was actually dating I knew I'd end it soon. It was so bad that I took pics to show people. It was shocking and I can still see it. Dirty dishes filled both sinks, the entire counter, and the freakin stove. Fridge was empty and so were the cabinets. The coffee tabl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/20 02:19 PM
93

I feel the exact same way. Just thinking about going back to all the extra shit I feel I have to do when I'm dating. The time sacrifices I have to make. Dealing with another person's opinions and emotions. Having to be on guard for yellow and red flags for months on end. Getting invested in someone and watching them flake on me and play mind games. I'm just really not interested.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 07:07 PM
13

Thankfully I was able to show my displeasure openly. I really do try to stay calm at work. I'm off corporate's radar and try to keep it that way. My boss is a relatively good guy and witnessed the whole thing. He stayed out of it though. Not because he knows I can hold my own, but because he is really conflict aversive. Not a great mentality for someone in his position, but I always say it could be worse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 07:03 PM
17

Right? I haven't been around many men lately, so it completely caught me off guard. But at the same time I completely expected it. Being a part of FDS has helped me recognize all of their abusive behaviors. Similarly to what you said, I've heard mentioned on here that it's great to call them out with "oh, so what's funny about it? Can you explain?" etc.... Apparently it confuses them because they realize how unfunny it actually is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 07:00 PM
14

I'd love too, but I can't afford the repercussions unfortunately. I'd end up with a target on my back and there aren't other jobs like mine in this area.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 06:21 PM
117

I need to vent and this post seems good enough for it lol. We had a maintenance guy come in. I was telling him about a problem. He couldn't get the machine to do it, but it has been a problem for two years. Anyway, in hindsight I think this guy was trying to lift me up at the expense of other women, but it came out like this. "All women are crazy". And when I said WOW and got pissed off, he says "what I mean is in my experience all women are crazy". So I just shook my head and stayed turned away…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 03:16 PM
400

You nailed it. They want to use, but they don't want to be used back. It's why I don't fw men anymore. I'm taking a long break and it's wonderfully peaceful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 02:26 PM
22

He's hoping someone better will come along.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 07:20 PM
40

My favorite part of the whole thing was when you said "what a d*pshit". You were absolutely right. You were smart to get rid of him and also block him so he can't blow up your phone anymore. You don't owe him shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 08:07 PM
6

What you need to especially understand is that he's not going to change because of any specific reasons you give him. I've personally never wanted to waste my time explaining myself at the end because I had most likely been telling him all the reasons for months.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 01:33 PM
21

Literally the last guy I attempted to date started talking sexy to me and then talked about squeezing my neck. The look on my face stopped him in his tracks. Then he could never get even close to hard when we were feeling each other up. He was mid 40s, only a little older than me. I was completely out of his league, but he just stopped texting. I figured embarrassment from the ED. That was an entire year ago and I haven't went on a date since. I'm really just not interested in trying to meet men…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 03:56 AM
6

I met one of those fetishists on a dating app. I was in a mood so I played a long with it for weeks. He was so shocked that he kept asking if I was serious or just fucking with him. When he started asking to meet, that's when I blocked. It stopped being fun.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 02:08 PM
20

Honestly one reason why I'm so happy being single is that I can burp and fart in peace. Most of my ex's have been obsessed with pointing out every single burp or fart, even when they couldn't hear them. It's exhausting
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 02:07 PM
30

I found it while searching memes related to "men expect everything and give nothing in return". I saw a comment last night of someone saying they found FDS EXACTLY the same way😂 I had been active on a couple reddit communities a few times here and there just trying to sort out relationship problems. Strangely enough I found both of those subs to be well moderated and they encouraged leaving because experience had shown them that people don't change. There was a lot of camaraderie and shared expe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 01:54 PM
15

Imagine having to control your urge to rape.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 10:33 PM
54

If it was his "dream girl", he'd find the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 10:31 PM
56

The old "it's just a joke". We get constant comments from male lurkers saying that, even when it is comments from men saying they'd rape if they could get away with it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 10:29 PM
64

My friend is trying to play nice til the divorce is finalized. He texted her about divorce info the other day and then followed it up with a meme. And when she responded to that he goes "well I guess your new relationship isn't doing too well if you still need attention from me". I was like girl just block him and have your lawyer deal with him from now on. They don't have kids. He asked for the divorce and then of course has tried to stop it repeatedly. Fucking narcissist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 05:41 PM
1

Lord I'm confused. I read that S at the end as sarcasm. Deleted my whole post. Look into Vitex herbal supplements. It helped me a lot with ovulation pain. I'd hurt before, during, and after ovulation. Peri menopause is really messing with me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 02:56 AM
10

Most doctors don't care. They just want to push the drugs. When I got my implant out (it was an absolute NIGHTMARE that NEVER got better) the doctor repeatedly asked me if I wanted to just keep it and add more medication to help with the issues I was having. My absolute and loudly vocalized relief to have an appt to get it out didn't phase her one damn bit. If I didn't need the damn thing out I would've given her a piece of my mind for harassing me about keeping it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 02:51 AM
11

That's what I would do if I let a man touch me again. It has been 1.5 years since the last time I made that mistake. I'm done with birth control and not comfortable having surgery.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 02:46 AM
8

Bless his heart 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 02:23 AM
17

Trust me when I say he doesn't care about your well being. He would love for you to respond anything, but especially anything that shows you still care or feel damaged by him. I hope you chose to ignore completely. I'm actually very surprised my abusive ex hasn't tried email.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 02:22 AM
22

Me too. I've had it done to me many times. I have all of my manipulative exes blocked.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 02:19 AM
79

To see if you still care enough to reply, so he can act hostile towards you again and then apologize again for it 3-6 months later. Rinse and repeat. Sometimes they come back years later. I lived it. Most of us have lived it. I know I'm never falling for it again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 02:18 AM
18

I hate how simple it is to answer her question. It's never going to make sense because most men only see women as tools or toys for their benefit and pleasure.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/20 02:06 PM
54

Same. Now if I hear a man say the word kinky, I RUN. No questions asked. I just ghost. No one ever choked anyone out when I was in my 20s. Now there's all kinds of terrible shit to watch out for. And that's why it's best to wait for sex. We need to find out if these men are into sick shit before we get emotionally invested.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/20 01:18 PM
66

My abusive ex did the same thing. It was never over real women, just actresses. Personally, I would just dump him. I no longer warn men to change because not one of them in over 20 years of dating ever changed. And your bf is an idiot if he thinks this behavior is acceptable. My guess is he wants to see you behave with jealousy.
/r/askFDS08/11/20 01:11 PM
5

I've been there with an old flame. Spent like 15 years apart. I even heard from him that I was the only woman he ever wanted. He kept flying me out to wherever he was working and then one day I noticed an old red flag and I ignored it. He moved to me and it never got better. And I did spend months trying to get him to understand that he had to fix it or I was leaving. Yet when I left him he was "blindsided". I could've saved myself an entire year of bs if I hadn't ignored that first red flag. Th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/20 01:40 AM
30

I'm right there with you. One red flag and I'm out. This guy here displayed more red flags after you called out the first one, so definitely GOOD RIDDANCE.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 12:16 PM
105

He doesn't deny it. He laughs and tries to make you sound silly for still being bothered. Please do yourself a HUGE favor and just block and delete. He doesn't deserve responses from you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 12:11 PM
33

This has happened to me more times than I can count. They stop trying as soon as they get you invested. And if you call it out, they'll try and claim that it's normal. I'll never let that be normal for me again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 05:44 PM
25

Sometimes the only answer to your question is "mental disorder". You literally can't understand their actions or words any other way. And you have to let that answer satisfy you. I know from experience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 09:47 PM
53

He was serious about that ground turkey😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 09:43 PM
62

The fact he doesn't respect she's under 21 and can't drink is enough to just block. Just because she can't drink alcohol doesn't mean she can't eat. And who the actual fuck wants to cuddle a stranger? He's a huge asshole for that last remark too. OP knows all this though and it makes me proud. I absolutely love being able to spot red flags quickly now. I had a friend try to get me to help figure out what she said wrong to a guy in a text. Before we even got to that, I spotted blatant verbal abus…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/20 04:16 PM
74

My kinks are diverse🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/20 01:03 PM
296

It's all about him🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/20 01:00 PM
30

I think I pushed it out of my memory thankfully. Can't even enjoy a lollipop or popsicle.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/20 06:36 PM
82

I've been dealing with shit like this since at least the early 90s. I actually had to learn how to yawn with my mouth shut so I could stop hearing "keep doing that and I'm going to put something in it" and many other variations of it. I'm nearing 40 and am still wary of men when I yawn or do or say anything really. It's fucking sad. Women don't do that shit ever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/20 05:37 PM
79

Lol I know so many of these men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/20 12:30 PM
79

This was just one of many red flags he put out. He revealed himself to be a narcissist wreaking havoc inside my place of work. I hope "at least he was...." falls out of your vocabulary when you're here in FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 04:43 PM
43

I had a friend recently try and convince me to give a guy a chance. I eventually was like "ok". And then I never heard from him. That was weeks ago. Was he expecting me to track him down?😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 04:34 PM
147

I literally had a guy tell me just the other day that he was looking for a woman who could be that mother figure for him. He's in his 30s. I said WOW that doesn't sound healthy at all😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 04:32 PM
26

It's not MY fault, YOU should've reminded me. 😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 04:29 PM
50

Good lord. That's 100% a psycho. I dodged one of these bullets over the weekend. I think the only reason he didn't go crazy on me over text is because I could go to HR. He got chatting with me because SUPPOSEDLY something another workmate said about me had him "worried". Come to find out he was just trying to add me to his narcissistic work harem. Without cluster B experience and FDS, I may have fallen for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/20 11:33 AM
16

Yep. Pancake mix, water, and egg. A grown man couldn't even make edible pancakes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/20 12:03 AM
23

"I can have fun without alcohol" Man: No, you can't. He's trash for so many reasons.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/20 02:48 PM
13

My immediate thought was that he pulls out all the stops to get women to fall in love with him and then treats them like they're crazy for it. Classic push/pull.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/20 02:56 PM
7

There's something off about a lot of the people in this area. Late 20s to early 30s all seem incredibly self absorbed. I'm not from here and this is the worst I've ever seen it. I made a lot of friends and lately I'm realizing almost none of them are capable of real friendships or even relationships. I hate it here lol. I'm happy to be so introverted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/20 02:25 PM
27

Sounds like an emotional wreck who brings down the people around him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/20 05:19 AM
7

I had a guy doing this before even a single date. He'd ask me my days off and then never ask me out. I blocked him. Then he found another way to contact me and did it again. I blocked him again. I don't tolerate bs at all anymore.
/r/askFDS17/10/20 10:44 PM
4

I ignored a red flag when my ex's guy "friend" called him an alpha type personality, behind his back. I think it was a warning and it did shake me up a little. I should've taken it seriously.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 10:42 PM
5

Good lord but also lol because my dad always called Simba, Sigma, and it used to kill all us kids😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 10:40 PM
19

It goes with the original post. They don't see a thing wrong with it and I don't understand it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 08:15 PM
15

They always want a damn medal for less than the bare minimum. For things they should already be doing in a relationship. Like she says "as it should be". Reminds me of the time my ex husband proudly told me he washed the dishes for once and I happily went in the kitchen to find one fucking bowl washed out of a sinkful of dirty ones. I let him have it. I'm so glad I divorced that loser.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 06:09 PM
17

I'm so glad she left, but afraid she'll let him "apologize" and go back into that shitty, one sided relationship. That's what it sounds like she wants. Like she left just to prove a point. My last relationship ended when I did become my ex's tenant. He was such a slob that I would never live in the same house. But he unexpectedly was offered the house he rented to purchase and it was a duplex. The heat and internet was included so I agreed to rent the downstairs and it was extremely cheap, like …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 06:01 PM
57

I'm late 30s but a friend of a friend exclaimed she wanted to introduce me to her friend who's a lot younger than me. Said I was his type. And then she said something like but don't fall in love with him because he hates that. Then her husband came into the room and she told him they should introduce me to the guy and the husband said the same thing....yeah but don't fall in love with him because he's tired of every woman he dates falling in love with him. I told them both NO THANKS. And honestl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 05:54 PM
13

This movie helped me leave a guy with attachment issues. He just couldn't be the man I needed and I knew I had to move on. I saw this movie twice at the theater. It's definitely triggering. I'll never be in another relationship like that one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 11:51 AM
40

Yep. We don't give the benefit of the doubt to new men. I don't even like giving it to men I think I can trust.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 11:49 AM
3

If he won't stfu about the age gap, get rid of him. I'm 39 and am finding myself attracted to some fit men just over 50. Usually my limit is about 6 years. For me, it depends on the man and how he handles it.
/r/askFDS15/10/20 05:36 PM
6

I've seen two comments now about being kicked in the shins and even one about assault with a golf club and all of them were excused as the boy "liking" them. My bff's sister's kid once kicked me so hard in the shin that my eyes watered and I was bruised for weeks. Her excuse? He likes me. He was like 8 years old and I was over 30. She's told me for years now that he still makes comments about me. She has also told me that he is so violent towards her that she feels he could kill someone and end …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 04:51 PM
7

I saw that this morning. She definitely got one of the rare, truly good partners in this world.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 04:17 PM
21

I'm curious if they have kids that she taught to speak that language.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 04:13 PM
16

It was hilariously all over the place. Like he somehow thought his old ass was the prize.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 06:45 PM
86

Over the summer I thought I finally met a decent guy to date. But literally as soon as I agreed to go out with him he started texting me weird shit. The last thing was so out there that I just replied "lol, that was a lot" and thankfully haven't heard from him since. Jesus. I'll take single all day long. When they aren't texting or saying weird shit, they're doing that push/pull crap and I'm just not entertaining any of it anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 04:58 PM
75

Is anyone else here able to orgasm from a sex dream? It happens to me quite a bit and it is GLORIOUS😆There's even physical evidence it actual happened. Can you imagine?😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 04:53 PM
18

I'm so glad I grew out of the stage where I actually cared if men thought I was a prude for not wanting to do weird and unnatural shit in the bedroom.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 08:40 PM
18

This happened to a friend of mine and it took her forever to get over the whiplash. He was her supposed best friend. She kept making excuses for his behavior until she was completely emotionally beaten down (man, I wrote that before I went back and saw you wrote the same thing). She finally got mad and got rid of him and started really healing. He still tries to come around but finally she sees him as the joke of a man that he is. She's met nothing but crazies since so she's been single a few ye…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 08:26 PM
17

It's a Fetish....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 08:19 PM
7

I haven't had good experiences with men like that. They are like robots sometimes and say hurtful things without realizing or caring. I no longer try and find excuses for poor behavior and just leave them alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 05:22 PM
17

My narcissistic, seemed on the spectrum ex would use the word logical a lot. It's a red flag for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 04:37 PM
126

Hinge makes it stupid simple. It lets you choose three pics and three questions to ask/answer and guys can't even manage that. You can tell by Hinge that they really are convinced that we don't care about their profile and only care what they look like, and yet they can't even put up decent pictures. Half the time they'd use the "your turn" option to try and force me to start the conversation. I was so COMPLETELY unimpressed by the men on Hinge that I didn't even last a week. Also, unless you're…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 01:10 AM
25

I haven't been touched by a man in over a year and only twice the year before that. I don't miss it AT ALL.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 04:42 PM
9

Makes so much sense
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/20 12:23 AM
9

I am DECEASED😂😂😂 I used to internally joke about throwing a bag over my ex's head. At certain angles he really was hard to look at.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/20 12:12 AM
314

My ex didn't text me enough on purpose in order to get a reaction. He never got one from me because I had a life outside of him. I know it was on purpose because every so often he'd try baiting me with "babe, I don't text you enough, do I? I'm going to do better" and I wouldn't take the bait and he wouldn't "do better". So many psychos out there trying to make women as miserable as they are. Stop falling for it❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/20 05:59 PM
2

LOL I've experienced that too and laughed so hard inside while also nexting them forever. I'm actually extremely lucky he ended up being far more decent and entertaining than that comment would've led me to believe. He ended up being an extremely talented (and ridiculously funny) eccentric and I have a soft spot for those types. I've thankfully never had pick-me tendencies, but I certainly excused more than I should have over the years because, well, that's what women are taught to do. At nearly…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/20 01:29 AM
4

I've lived all over the US and it is like this everywhere I have been and it is getting worse. My experiences in the UK in the late 2000s wasn't much better. It wasn't like this when I was starting to date in the 90s but it had turned into this when I hit my 20s. One of my favorite ex's, on our first date, turned to me and said "I've had a REALLY great time with you. Better than I ever imagined (we were coworkers). Would you maybe want to make this a friends with benefits thing?" And then he sai…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 09:10 PM
2

Such a red flag!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 08:52 PM
2

He was THE BEST
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 08:51 PM
6

I just look at them blankly and if they write it down and hand it to me, I look at them blankly and then throw it away later. I have zero issues just staying single forever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 08:49 PM
11

In this guy's case, that's what I think but someone commented that maybe genuinely he didn't understand at first, but then when he is repeatedly told what an asshole he is, he " thinks"everybody else is wrong. I had recent experience with this. I had an abusive ex who would do and say the most narcissistic shit ever and I would walk the fuck away. The weird thing is he would ask friends or family members their opinion, they'd call him an asshole, and then he'd send me the screenshot and apologiz…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 05:46 PM
14

Hey ladies, it's fine. We have a man explaining that it was JuSt PlAYfUl BaNtEr and NoT aLl MeN.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 05:28 PM
57

His wife, his parents, and his sister all TELL HIM he's an emotionally stunted asshole, but he still comes to reddit to get their opinion because iT wAs JuSt A jOkE. Wow, but not surprised. This man is a whole lost cause. His wife really does deserve better and I hope this is what it takes for her to believe it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 03:26 PM
3

Exactly
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 03:22 PM
4

I wonder how many of the NO votes aren't members here and how many of those are men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 09:53 PM
3

Blocking the mods doesn't prevent us blocking you, dumbass
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 02:17 PM
13

The depo shot caused me so much bone loss that I stress fractured both tibias in training. It took me years to fully recuperate. And back then it was new and they didn't tell you about it. Supposedly you stop losing bone after you stop. It's unreal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 02:16 PM
2

This is what I came to say😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 03:14 PM
17

He did major love bombing for a couple months and then snapped one day. It was beyond shocking. I left that day but having never experience that before and lots of other stuff, we got in somewhat of a pattern of him lashing out every couple months and me immediately leaving for a week or weeks. He was in his 40s so it was extra weird. It felt tremendously good to cut the cord on that relationship a couple years ago.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 02:45 PM
9

I can imagine. My work barely changed but lots of people started to work from home. Not me though lol. Driving to work was so eerie those first few months. Enjoy your time<3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 02:41 PM
15

My BPD/NPD would self reflect a lot. Once he told me he didn't know anything about me and that it was his fault. And then immediately back to the abusive behavior. I was out by then thankfully.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 02:28 PM
5

I've missed your posts and comments.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 02:26 PM
39

My ex did that. And I always immediately left and stayed quiet til he came crawling back. I shouldn't have and I won't in the future. But it did really feel good to just walk every time he threatened. It would've been even more powerful to walk and stay gone and block his ass on everything.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 02:25 PM
46

So many of our ex's could've written that. It's crazy how men will work hard to make a woman fall in love with them and be so happy to have her and then spend the rest of the relationship treating her like absolute dog shit. They don't want to love someone. They want to WIN. They want CONTROL. They want someone to love them and they want them to prove their love through various shit tests. We're not falling for that shit anymore. Red flag? Yellow flag? We're leaving at the first signs of them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 02:22 PM
3

I cringed at the "ha ha". I'd beware.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 08:20 PM
25

Any time my ex asked for pics, I sent him tasteful selfies (always fully clothed). He was smart enough not to complain.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 08:19 PM
17

And then thinks she's the problem and maybe she's overreacting. I can't.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 04:35 PM
16

Same. 40 very soon. I even went to an evangelical christian school and they didn't push that. The reason? They wanted to ignore sex entirely and hope we didn't notice it was a thing LOL. But I do remember this purity stuff on the tv. I felt like I noticed it AFTER I finished high school.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 04:34 PM
38

It's a red flag. We don't make excuses for them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/20 04:36 PM
23

Lord this reminds me of my LV ex who seemed HV. We lived together and he was always hinting at marriage. One Christmas he got me a basket of damn kitchen utensils with a step stool. That was IT. I cried and he didn't even have the mental capacity to console me. He just disappeared. One year for my birthday he bought me a 3 night stay at a cabin by the ocean (not as great as it sounds) and then announced he had to work the whole time. THE FUCK? Oh and he bought me the wrong season of my show and …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 08:19 PM
12

She actually is. She's one tough woman and one of the funniest and happiest women I know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 06:28 PM
6

I go into every relationship with the idea of being thoughtful and loving, because it's who I am, but it's never really been reciprocated. It has been expected, taken advantage of, and sometimes thrown in my face as "needy". How could showing someone love make me needy? Boy, bye. So I ALWAYS end up throwing the whole man away and taking a long break.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 04:33 PM
33

My friend got HIV this way. Luckily it has never progressed to AIDS and their child was born virus free. Obviously she divorced him when she found out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 04:18 PM
41

I won't pay a penny over kelly blue book value. That has saved me a few times. I also don't mind being rude. I'm the customer and they are there to listen to me. I have had to walk out plenty of times. Once I turned my chair around and let the man talk to the back of my head for a bit before I got up and walked out.
/r/askFDS24/09/20 04:00 PM
12

Sometimes they'll still pursue you in hopes they'll change your mind. Happened to me a few times🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 04:34 PM
12

Gross. Get rid of him! And if he tries to backtrack and change his mind, don't let him. He doesn't mean it. Let him go. Could be he's hoping his ex will eventually take him back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 04:29 PM
23

Exactly my thoughts!! It's his opportunity to impress a woman enough that she wants to see him again. Smh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 04:44 PM
25

Here is a peer reviewed study😂😂😂 Nah I'm only dating men who want to impress me with a real date.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 04:42 PM
11

It's too soon for that type of message. Keep trusting your gut.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 04:39 PM
27

Lol it's so true! My successful friend stopped seeing a guy because after he left she saw dandruff flakes all over her couch and was too disgusted to see him again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 04:39 PM
5

Mine was there the whole time FACEBOOKING every single thing, but made a really strange comment about how it smelled after the birth lol and then made a comment about our kid's skin color. We're white. He was white. Made no damn sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 04:33 PM
4

I miss traveling solo. I did it a lot before I had a kid. And was planning some trips this summer and fall but canceled because of the state of the world right now. Keep on planning and going. I will be soon!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 11:49 PM
5

Same. 40 by end of year. Right as I was leaving my ex, I got a financial plan going and will now be debt free in 2.5 years. It was a five year plan so single now for 2.5 years and it has been incredible. I'm not lonely. Sure, I miss physical intimacy sometimes but it really isn't worth dealing with a man, with anyone. I even struggle taking up friend invites because I'm so happy alone on weekends. But I try to go just for the human interaction and I never regret it. Best of luck! You can do it. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 11:48 PM
3

He's HVM to the outside world but not to those that really know him. I liked reading your take on it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 09:40 PM
18

Haha it's fine as long as he's blocked now. They're both trash.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 09:39 PM
30

Also it was my birthday lol. Forgot that bit. Like I wanted to get up and spend my bday at a hospital. But I was having real contractions every five minutes and wanted to be sure.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 09:38 PM
78

Seriously. I had to demand that MY HUSBAND take me to the hospital because I feared I was experiencing premature labor. He tried to talk me out of it because it was "early" and it was his "day off". I had to get mean. And I WAS laboring prematurely and spent the next 2.5 months in and out of the hospital. Also, I divorced his ass soon after.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 09:31 PM
87

I came here to say this. He can't 50/50 pregnancy, childbirth, or breastfeeding/pumping. Pregnancy showed me I married a LVM and I kicked that ass to the curb before our kid's second birthday. I warned him, but you know how that goes. The only solution was getting rid. I lived in the bathtub half of second and all of the third trimester. It's the only damn place I got some relief. I was lucky I couldn't work and had that luxury. He still expected me to do shit while on bedrest. I'm so glad I onl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 09:21 PM
7

I can't even find him attractive, he's so cringe. They all are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 09:14 PM
15

Exactly what I was thinking😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 09:08 PM
25

I agree that it 100% crossed the line. If you're uncomfortable with it, he should love you enough to stop. He cares more about her feelings than yours and that's all you need to know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 08:51 PM
65

Good for you. You set a boundary and he went behind your back and broke it. The time for apologies is over. He'd keep doing it but be even more secretive about it. I don't generally talk to my exes. Every once in a blue moon I will send a very cool ex (from 2001) a cool music video or meme (and vice versa) because he's the only person on this Earth that could appreciate it with me, but we speak maybe once every 6-9 months and it is never about our relationship or anything related to it. He lives…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 06:41 PM
3

Good for you ending that relationship. You never would've been fulfilled no matter how successful he is. Good for you for seeing that and seeing how important your needs are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 06:36 PM
15

I honestly didn't realize people can be "best friends" that are not romantically attracted to each other but are sexually attracted to each other. I'm too old for the shit younger people keep coming up with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 06:33 PM
52

I had a guy get butthurt because I didn't ask a lot of questions about him and so when I tried asking him, he never answered a single one and talked about something else😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 06:31 PM
99

OMG😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 06:30 PM
34

That's why I completely quit. I tend to try it about twice a year. It's weird because usually one of the first guys to message me actually messages something decent and I enjoy talking to them for a few days or a couple weeks. But they all inevitably end up being a douche in one way or other and then I never have another decent conversation again and just delete the app. I've seriously dated two guys on apps since I started over ten years ago. And I made a male friend who was ok but overall a pi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 06:15 PM
2

It was four paragraphs of absolutely shit. It looked like a man wrote it. It was so bad I don't want it on this sub so the male lurkers can see it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 12:18 PM
8

hahahaha NO
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 01:18 AM
44

hahaha was a good tune😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 01:17 AM
2

Oh he revels in being a loser. It's obvious. Harassing women and hoping to get a reaction is literally the only thing that makes him feel better about himself. This probably isn't the only sub he trolls. He's made a full time, unpaid job out of obsessing over reddit post and comments. I wanted to delete this post because it gets him the attention he craves. He probably thinks it's equal to fame or something. It's almost sad. Oh good. Another mod trashed this post. I'll do the same next time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 12:40 AM
12

I've been actually proposed to with a ring three times and married once and then divorced. And my last bf and also my last date after I dumped his LV ass both wanted to get married. And that's just recently. It helps that I don't mess with fuck boys, but I've had my share of committed LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 12:15 AM
22

I feel like those pics show a real lack of intelligence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 10:46 PM
22

Funny because I always meet men who are chomping at the bit to marry and I'm the one who's uninterested.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 10:36 PM
46

You're not alone. I love clean shaven and also love 3-5 days of not shaving. After that, it needs to be gone. And I can not even look at a goatee lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 10:35 PM
23

I had this recently in real life and I had to block twice. I met this guy through "porch beers" at a friend's house. We hit it off. He asked for my number. He texted regularly and was just very very cool. He's in his early 40s, which is my age range. Two weeks of this and he has not asked me out and starts taking longer to text back (24 hours) and even not responding to the last text which was always a question. So I blocked him without a word and moved on with my life. Two weeks later he adds m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 10:31 PM
2

Change his name from Babe to Soon to be ex or Ex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:52 PM
2

You aren't overreacting and yes it is rude. Throw the whole man away and let him date women who don't wear makeup if that's what he prefers. I've always worn some kind of makeup. Sometimes heavy but mostly light and haven't had one single man I've dated complain about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:45 PM
10

I don't believe it either. I believe they treat affectionate women like shit so they stop showing them affectionate and eventually leave.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:02 PM
5

I'm super affectionate, but I find most men don't want that or act like they don't, and they won't reciprocate and will try to make you feel bad for wanting to give affection. I had one call me needy and you best believe that was the last day I gave him a reason to call me that. I can guarantee you that's the issue here and not women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 07:58 PM
2

YES!! Such great lyrics😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 07:52 PM
7

Gross. But good news for her, there are lots of them everywhere and they are also ugly af.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 07:44 PM
2

I haven't heard this one and I'm a LOA fan. Rubber Doll never fails to make me laugh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 07:39 PM
13

He DMs everybody here. He literally has no life and this is all he does.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 07:35 PM
14

This reminds me of a time, quite a few years back, when I randomly met a guy at a bar and we really got on well. By the end of the night he asked me if I wanted to get a room with him and since I hadn't had sex in forever, I said Yes. Then right before we leave, still at the bar, he says "hotels are expensive. Do you want to just do it in my car?" I laughed in his face and left.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 09:38 PM
2

This is such a good reminder.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 05:02 PM
23

They don't seem to realize that this would give us free rein to kill them on the spot. We're not as weak as they think.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 04:32 PM
48

I went to a religious school and straight up did not get sex ed or any biology about private areas whatsoever. I seriously learned more about my vagina from the how-to booklet in a box of tampons.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 04:28 PM
134

Won't someone PLEASE think of the men?!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 04:16 PM
30

You NAILED it. I can only start to relax if the guy continues the same behaviors for over six months and even then I'm wary.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 04:11 PM
53

He has a really quick wit😂 Nah, he blurted that immature shit out with ZERO control or thought.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 10:20 PM
5

I've never heard of that but I struggle (or did) with scalp issues. I wash just my scalp every other morning or two with either Paul Mitchell Clarifying or Sebastian Clarifying. I've tried tons but these are amazing and all I will buy now. Especially Sebastian. Enjoy your summer (or try to lol)!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 08:28 PM
5

Oh I completely agree. I spoil myself pretty regularly with little things that make me happy. I'm lucky in that I am happy to get up every single day and go about my day, but I really truly enjoy having no reason to go out and just being in my home doing whatever I please. I haven tried it yet because honestly my hair is pretty great on its own, but I hear Olaplex is the absolute best hair treatment you can buy and use at home. It can get very pricey, but the $30 stuff is amazing and lasts a lon…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 06:50 PM
16

Oh definitely. I struggle to drag myself out to group invites or anything because I adore being alone at home so much. I work 40+ hours a week outside of home, so that doesn't help.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 04:23 PM
65

That comment lol. Some men will treat you horribly just to PROVE that you love them enough to put up with any and all bullshit. And we don't do that here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 04:22 PM
15

GV Post Malone😂 I'm deceased
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 04:19 PM
53

I am SO SICK of men and their iT wAs JuSt A jOkE.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 08:36 PM
23

I've actually had a couple guys say that to me in a menacing way while also trying to play it off as a joke. I was legit scared both times even though I wasn't that far away from other people. Imagine if we had been alone. It makes me shudder.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 04:50 PM
83

Can confirm. The "guilt" goes away with practice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 04:38 PM
119

I'm triggered because I literally dumped a guy who would go into my apt and eat my child's mini snacks. It happened once and I told him never to do it again. I told him I also have full sized of the same thing and he's welcome to those. Mini's are expensive and microwaveable for school. One day I came home and saw another one in the trash. When I confront him he went on a whole ass rant about how he bought a 40 pack of them for my kid (he absolutely didn't and never had done lol) and said the ca…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 08:44 PM
2

Exactly this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 04:21 PM
6

This worked wonders for me! I felt a weight lift as soon as I was finished.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 11:11 AM
108

I had a guy with literally NO MONEY ask me if I was with him for his money. I about died. I was like uh we make the same amount of money😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 08:21 PM
9

Haha yep
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 06:50 PM
12

Always trust your gut. If it felt rude, it was most likely rude.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 06:48 PM
13

From a friend, it's probably honesty. From a guy who seems interested in dating you, it's probably negging.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 04:56 PM
19

Negging doesn't work on smart women who love themselves. It just turns us off and makes us lose interest, just like you said.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 04:54 PM
20

I find that men hanging in bars are like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 02:45 PM
3

He quit a cake job making $30/hr plus over time to move cross country to me. He could only make $15/hr here and signed a two year contract with the company, but I dumped him in less than a year. It didn't ruin his life forever, but it sure didn't help. He didn't have any savings that I know of and seemed to really struggle.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 11:34 AM
1

Pretty much. The non porn sick man will love it. The porn sick man wants you gagging and in pain.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 11:32 AM
2

Oh definitely. I had to quit dating apps. Coming across a decent profile with someone that could also hold a conversation and display HV traits was so rare that I threw up my hands and walked away from it. Too much digging through trash only to find more trash exhausted me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 12:17 AM
6

Even a supposed HVM will respond timely and set dates and then reveal his LVM status if you buy his bullshit too early. Speaking from experience. We have to vet forever. I wish it wasn't this way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 12:14 AM
2

A decent profile doesn't stop this from happening. It helps but it is NOT a guarantee.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 12:12 AM
9

They don't get the hints. They are literally expecting you to make plans so they can tell YOu whether they're available or not. I literally just went through this with a 40+ yr old who originally sought ME out. He kept asking me what days I was free and then not saying a damn thing about us doing anything and then not responding for a day or more. I did block. I have no tolerance for weak men. Same man found me two weeks later on social media to say he missed talking to me and started up convers…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 12:11 AM
34

Exactly. They're excuses for their poor behavior don't mean SHIT. It's just a way to "get out of trouble".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 11:48 PM
256

They think we're put on this Earth to please them and don't give two fucks whether they visually please us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 11:31 PM
151

Older LVM are always going to "shoot their shot". It's not you, it's them. I look to still be in my late 20s and still have old Grandpa's hitting on me everywhere. Younger guys stare a lot but older predators at least try. Be ruthless, when it's safe to do so. It throws them off guard and lowers their self esteem even more.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 11:30 PM
24

Sexual attraction is important. You absolutely don't need to "settle" just because a guy seems good enough. Keep vetting. It's really difficult to find a man who has every thing you want and need.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 11:27 PM
22

I am doing my best. He's a really empathetic and loving boy, so my fingers are crossed. I teach him real life shit based on his age, so he knows some shit already. He's still a year or so from puberty but we will 100% have those talks when it's appropriate. I still have to talk to him about how some grown-ups, mostly men, want to hurt children and look at them naked. I hate that it has to be said, but it 100% does. I have those talks every few months, especially when he has sleepovers and whatno…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 11:22 PM
13

👏 👏 👏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 11:16 PM
132

The self aware ones are the worst. You feel sorry for them. They want you to feel sorry for them. Don't. Believe them. Block their sorry asses and move on to better things. My ex could've written this. They are all the same. And they are all unworthy of another person's love while they're like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 11:14 PM
3

Haha Oh I'm sure but he's left a trail of those girls and before I dumped him I explained to him why those relationships didn't work out for him. Of course he didn't want to hear it. Well bye forever and good luck!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 10:43 PM
6

I always hated my dad's blue eyes. I suspect now he was a narcissist. And my abusive ex had eyes that I couldn't bear to look into. So I think there may be something to this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 09:47 PM
7

I completely agree. I really am only available every other week though because of my kid so I was hoping I wasn't dealing with another typical douchebag. Surprise! I was.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 09:37 PM
41

TLDR. Yes. She'd be an idiot. They literally do not change. I tried to give a dude from twenty years ago another chance because I forgot what made me end it all those years ago. I quickly remembered it and ended it again forever. He was super passive aggressive, unable to communicate, enjoyed "punishing" me by avoiding sex, and was just generally a fucking bore. He actually waited until he'd quit his job and moved to my city (solely for a chance with me) to start showing his true colors again. H…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 08:18 PM
8

hahaha maybe but I didn't tell him I was blocking him, I just quietly did it. I figured it would just look like I stopped responding. I had no idea he would try and find me on social media and he didn't even mention that I stopped responding. I feel like he'll get the message now that he can't find me there on either of his accounts. I wasn't even doing either to get a reaction. I just didn't want to hear from him anymore and blocking was the only way to guarantee it. I told our acquaintance and…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 08:12 PM
3

Way too many. I'm lucky to have dodged them so long through careful and ruthless vetting, but one slipped through a few years back and it was harder than usual to recover even though I chose to end it. It does seem like every man I've dated was extremely damaged in some way. I don't even know why I keep trying to find a good one. Experience has shown me there aren't any.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 06:48 PM
15

I'm like 40 and divorced so I'm okay with dating single dads. In fact, I 100% don't trust bachelors at my age. Dating at my age especially sucks because men seem more damaged and set in their ways. Plus ED issues. Also I want to know why his kid's Mom chose being a single Mom over staying with him. I left my husband for caring more about his dick than me and our kid. He was fucking hopeless and helpless, and struggling for a bit was better than being with him. So I mostly stay single and vet pot…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 06:12 PM
6

Oh I agree. He had borrowed a couple games from me for his daughter. I think that's all he had. I'm sure I had a good time. I just don't remember it anymore lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 05:01 PM
27

I dumped a serious bf once for starting to act flaky and when I told him I was free for New Year's and to get back to me with plans, I didn't hear a peep out of him for several days. So early on Dec 29th or 30th, I sent him a simple break up text of "return my things at your earliest convenience". He didn't even fight. He just texted ok and then dropped my stuff inside my screen door without even a warning. He didn't seem like a LVM until that week. I was blindsided.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 04:50 PM
34

I feel like 1 and 3 definitely fit this one. Maybe even #2. Doesn't matter anymore. He's blocked.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 04:43 PM
7

They don't sound like amazing friends at all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 04:05 PM
118

I'm trying to get over a really weird experience with a guy. We randomly met through a mutual acquaintance and started texting regularly. He's 40+, by the way. He'd ask me what days I didn't have my kid and then never ask me out. After a couple weeks of this he started taking forever to respond, so one day I just blocked him. I just realized I didn't care enough anymore to bother with him. I forgot about him and two weeks later he's sent me a friend request and a message saying he missed talking…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 03:41 PM
7

I'm just so happy you were smart (and petty lol) enough to stand your ground and push back hard. I'm the same way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 03:26 PM
6

Maybe. But I spent whole weekends at an ex's house and it was clear very early on that he wasn't someone I could share a home with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 03:20 PM
3

As a divorced woman, this is where I currently am. I don't want to live with or be married to a man ever again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 03:17 PM
2

We go 50/50 with friends, not partners. You don't have to agree with everything FDS has in the handbook, but you also don't have to try and fight about it in the comments. You can ignore it and hope you're right and we're wrong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 03:07 PM
6

I never once choked on a dick. You can give great oral without actually putting it in your mouth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 02:43 PM
101

That was 100% assault. We need to start holding these men accountable. Had you died he would've told them you asked to be choked.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 02:29 PM
21

They come here with their aCtUaLLy and As A mAn and nOt All MeN and YoU'rE a FaT wHaLe FeMaLe InCeL and it gets old. They'll spend what looks like an hour on a comment that we're just going to delete anyway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 02:22 PM
20

Yeah I didn't love the wording either, but this is good😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 01:48 PM
27

I'm just now seeing this, but I literally just left a reply comment on the anti-poly post saying women need to INSTA DUMP a man as soon as they ask for ANYTHING she's not comfortable with. A no isn't enough because he will never stop thinking about it. Just throw the trash out as soon as it reveals itself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 09:17 AM
37

😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 09:11 AM
164

My ex husband wasn't THIS disrespectful, but he was close and it caused me to lose every ounce of love and respect I had for him before our kid even turned two years old. All because of mUh PeNiS. I wanted a partner to raise a child with, not a sex obsessed, whiny man child. It was unforgivable and so is this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 09:08 AM
8

I only noticed it was trending about six years ago when I was long divorced and looking around the dating apps. Dating apps are filled with loser men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 08:35 AM
18

Exactly! Once they bring this up OR ANYTHING that you find abhorrent, choose C and block on everything. Threesome? Dump. Anal? Dump. BDSM? Dump. Some weird fetish? Dump. Because if you don't get the dumping over with they are just going to keep bringing it up or look for/obsess over other women that will do it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 08:27 AM
23

I got around my jealous tendencies as soon as I started dating. I decided if someone was giving me reasons to feel jealous, then they weren't for me. It has worked extremely well to keep me away from (or to get rid of) low value men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 08:11 AM
60

I think it was as simple as her saying HELL NO and he complied😂Then he gets dumped and remembers me and knows I ain't with it. But it was too late. Once you tell me you're disgusting and a waste of time, I'll never forget it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 07:20 AM
380

I had one try to tell me his dream was polyamory and I told him to fuck off. I didn't block him because, at the time, I didn't realize how important that is. Literally six months later he was trying to strike up a conversation with me again to tell me he was now into monogamy because of his latest ex. Y'all I laughed out loud in my home. He looked like mf Santa Claus at 39. He missed and completely blew up his chance to impress me. Polyamory pffft😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 12:39 AM
20

Came here to say that too 😂 👏 👏 👏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 11:17 PM
39

I experienced that with the same guy. One day I was too thin and he was worried. Next day I was gaining weight and he didn't want it to get out of hand. Hurting other people makes them feel better about themselves. Best to get rid of them and block at the first sign of abuse. Don't second guess yourself and try to understand WHY they do it, just leave them to rot in their own insecurity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 08:59 PM
171

The abusive men will literally grasp at straws to hurt or neg you. My abusive ex called me thunder thighs lmao. I was about 100 lbs to his 300 lbs. It was such a bizarre tactic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 07:47 PM
61

I find that you can't post or comment in any sub that allows men without being abused, made fun of, or banned. It's unreal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 07:41 PM
2

I can understand your worry. My ex was not a monster, but his ADD ran me off. He wouldn't pursue any type of therapy even though I asked. Our son has the same ADD. I come from a narcissist Dad and a borderline Mom who has a twin brother with some kind of severe and debilitating mental disorder. I used to worry I'd be like any of them, but genetically I was thankfully spared. I worried about my son, but as he has aged I can see he has great amounts of empathy and is just an overall good person. H…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 04:06 PM
3

I'm glad you persisted. It's so important to advocate for yourself. I've had the same issue with doctors and even dentists. But if I feel they aren't listening or helping, I have zero issues finding a new provider.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 03:33 PM
8

Exactly! If you don't agree, you don't have to scream about it in the comments.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 03:30 PM
2

It'S a JoKe!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 02:16 PM
10

I had an ex that I YEETED see my car at the laundromat and then come in to stand in front of me to drone on about himself. I damn near fell asleep.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 01:31 PM
70

I need to know the plot. I need to hear both sides of the story. There are three sides. Each person's side and the truth. Let me play devil's advocate for a minute. I absolutely despise these types. Red flag.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 12:57 PM
22

THIS!!! Keep vetting. He's likely to start showing his insecurity and turn on you in a few months. I dated a really unattractive nerd and he turned into a monster as soon as I fell in love with him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 02:37 AM
52

He was seeing other women and chose a different woman. When it doesn't work out, he'll come crawling back. Don't give him the chance. Block him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 02:32 AM
26

Queen energy 👑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 02:30 AM
83

Checking up on him is self harm and you know it. I had an abusive ex too, but I never once checked up on him. It's already hard enough to heal when you don't. Stop harming yourself and keep him blocked. He'll never stop being abusive. Every new girl is going to experience what you did. He'll eventually end up alone and unwanted. You don't need to check to know that's his future.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 02:26 AM
8

It's pathetic. I never take it personally. I 100% know it's them and not me. Some of them are actually surprised that I'm not taking it personally and that's exactly what I tell them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 12:49 AM
13

I know. I agree. But they were saying that eventually it was drop so significant that there would be economic issues. Let me look for the article. fertility falling It even says we might think this a good thing, but then talks about healthcare money and taxes, of course.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 09:32 PM
21

I read a similar article and that's exactly what they were saying. They said that to improve birth rates they may need to take women's rights away, education included, but prefer not to do that. I was appalled.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 09:05 PM
20

The last guy I had sex with got so hard, so fast that I took a moment to enjoy what a turned on penis is supposed to look like. I hadn't seen one in almost ten years before that. All the others took forever to get turned on and just barely got hard enough to do anything with it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 04:59 PM
17

I did my own sexy pics for my ex husband when he was deployed. I looked amazing and did so many outfit changes and poses. All this mf said was "good job on the pics"😂😂😂 I didn't let it slide. I lit into him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 04:56 PM
1

TLDR
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 01:20 PM
5

Oh damn. I get it now. I have never rented a room in a house. I always rent either the whole apartment or the whole house. I get where you're coming from now and am absolutely horrified. I've never lived in big cities where rooms cost the same as whole apartments. I always rent outside the city and commute in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 01:08 PM
6

What a weird question. You don't have a choice who you share a rental with??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 01:00 PM
7

Damn he had a lot to say about that. You barely said anything. Block and forget about him. He's no good.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 12:09 PM
10

If I'm paying 50/50 of the rent and utilities, I have a roommate, not a boyfriend/husband. And I won't have male roommates🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 12:07 PM
51

Men that actually want to impress you will WANT to take you to dinner and interesting dates. Don't settle for less.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 12:03 PM
51

Fat whale is their go-to diss. You have no idea how many times I've deleted that comment from boys trolling FDS😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 12:01 PM
21

Lord this is pathetic as hell😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 11:59 AM
40

Asking for snaps or IG is a red flag to me. However, I was chatting with a guy via text who asked to call and 5-10 minutes into the convo he started trying to sex chat me. I literally trust none of them about anything at this point. Just keep vetting OP and if you don't want to SC or anything else, stick to your boundaries.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 11:30 PM
2

Good lord🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 10:25 PM
33

Exactly! Any time I don't choose to ghost, I wait for the attack lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 10:13 PM
37

It IS terrible 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 10:05 PM
3

It's definitely painful, but blocking everywhere gives you back your power.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 09:48 PM
8

Interesting. Thanks!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 07:21 PM
7

We were still new so I got my ex a card and a little gift bag with just a few, inexpensive things that had meaning between us. He actually blew up at me the day before for no reason and even started picking on things about me, so I ended up dumping his ass. He spent his birthday alone 🖕 Turns out he'd ruin every meaningful holiday (even Halloween) like this because he was super disordered. Definitely DO NOT spend much money or go all out for someone you barely know. A card is more than enough th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 06:55 PM
38

I gave an ugly a chance once. We ended up having palpable chemistry, but I never once thought his face or body was in any way attractive. He turned out to be the hands down most abusive pos I ever dated. I couldn't understand how someone so narcissistic could also be so fucking insecure. It made zero sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 06:49 PM
78

This is a game. Don't play it. Just block and forget about him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 06:43 PM
38

The silent treatment IS abuse. Keep him blocked everywhere, even in person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 03:41 AM
8

This is why I use alts to post elsewhere, but I always regret posting elsewhere because of hateful and ignorant comments from men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 11:59 PM
67

If failure means not ending up with a low value, fuckboi, then please sign me up!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 11:58 PM
2

What makes me especially mad is that my one friend's boyfriend was just a friend, a REALLY good friend that she trusted. He wore her down FOR YEARS to get into a relationship with her and then within a few months of dating started that narcissistic bullshit. She finally left after a year if it and has been dodging sick, game playing dudes ever since. My other friend went from psycho to psycho and I fear it's only a matter of time before she falls for another one because her self esteem is on the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 11:53 PM
7

It really does take strength to move on. It's difficult to make that decision and stick with it. But it honestly hurts even more to stay. Staying is a soul killer. You have a much better chance when you leave and move forward.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 10:53 PM
71

Even a LV husband will do this. A LV husband that you mistakenly thought was HV until the PLANNED pregnancy. My ex husband would rather divorce than treat me better (I tried to get through to him) and then threw whole pity parties for himself that I didn't love him "just the way he is". I don't miss his ass at all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 10:50 PM
78

Every time my friends have come to me for advice about abusive men, they seem to hear me and are ready to end it. But a few days later, they come to me again with some plan they've hatched to make the relationship work. And the plan is always to lower their own boundaries and expectations. When I try to tell them this is a bad idea, they absolutely do not want to hear me and make up every excuse they can. Weeks to months later, they've dumped the loser and it takes them months to completely move…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 05:41 PM
2

I feel your anger. It really gets to me too. I'm so thankful my male coworker who I work really closely with has never done this shit. He's not a HVM but at least he's not this. I did have a male coworker who sort of did this. I snapped on him enough times that he actually stopped and we became good work friends. He was watching what he said around me and so was I towards him. I guess sometimes you really do need to put them in their fucking place. Usually I don't bother because I rarely see the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 05:25 PM
11

Hmmm I had my last ex (my landlord after a yr of dating) cry that it wasn't fair that I needed to pay my rent on the 15th because I had other bills on the first. It wasn't fair.... I always found that so weird. So I opted to pay on the 15th of the month prior. He still tried to squeeze an extra month out of me when I left. He claimed my last rent check with the memo JULY RENT was really for June. It's like he completely forgot I was paying two weeks early and even tried to claim no one ever pays…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 05:15 PM
4

This is a damn good perspective.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 05:10 PM
5

When my ex tried to get me back by claiming he really loved me, I said "that's funny because towards the end it felt like you hated me". It really did. There was nothing left to try and save by the time I left. Why be in a relationship with someone who acts like they hate most everything about you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 05:07 PM
86

I'm so sick of this excuse
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 05:00 PM
7

The men I hang out with at get togethers seem to be the ones who minimize my feelings by playing devil's advocate and making excuses for the other party or telling me I need to get over something that just happened when I still hear them whine about shit that happened years prior. I am so fucking tired of men trying to tell me how I should feel. It's exhausting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 04:57 PM
4

That's exactly the route an abuser will go. "I miss what I got out of the relationship but let me tell YOU what YOU need." Bahahaha I can't with these disordered men who have no empathy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 04:54 PM
79

Me too! I've been single over two years and even thinking of giving a man a chance fills me with dread. I've dated here and there, but I always end it quick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 12:43 AM
20

Your friend is an absolute QUEEN. I loved that whole paragraph. I dated an IT who's very existence is punishment enough, for sure. The narcissist cycle really is very fascinating. I continued to date someone with BPD/NPD and the cycles went off very much like clockwork. This one experienced that very famous BPD rage and disassociation. Utterly fascinating when you can look at it from a psychology perspective, plus I learned why my Mom acted the way she did. Eventually the cycles got closer toget…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 11:14 PM
15

I actually told our director that I liked the new supervisor because he's "clearly competent". I guess I was just surprised to have someone competent enough to understand my job without being trained. It's not rocket science but the guy that currently works with me stresses me out daily with his laziness, poor memory, and uh incompetence lol. Maybe that's where your boss is coming from. It may be rare at your company.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 11:01 PM
28

Stop questioning yourself. I would've dumped him the first time he said negative shit about my future kids or my weight. That's enough to get rid of a man. It won't get any better. The good times do not negate all the bad things said and done.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 05:01 PM
14

You'd probably benefit from the sub bpdlovedones. There's a whole lot of this behavior on there and the members are really pleasant and helpful. Good mods too, probably. Narcissistic abuse is probably a good sub too, but I never went there. Any of the things you listed should be dealbreakers and reasons for blocking, and not the type of behavior you make excuses for. Good luck moving on from this. It can take a long time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 03:05 PM
5

My ex acting like that is why I decided divorce was better and I was right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 01:32 PM
5

I have the live performance on my player and never skip this song😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 01:29 PM
10

I'm not living with a man again. We can do sleepovers but he's not getting a key to my place.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 01:25 PM
23

That's been my experience
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 01:18 PM
17

Is this Tyrone?😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 04:10 AM
37

Men are the reason I'm not comfortable not wearing a bra when I go out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 01:09 AM
42

You have to convince yourself that it doesn't matter how good it felt in the beginning, none of it was real and it will never get any better. That's the only reason I went back. I thought he didn't mean it and it wouldn't happen again. I was really stupid to think that because it turned out to be regular cycles of love bombing, devaluing, and discarding. Even after I finally and brutally dumped him, he kept reaching out to me and going through the five stages of grief via text. The only reason h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 11:13 PM
8

😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 08:34 PM
132

This is why we push so hard for our members to wait three months before getting sexually involved. Sex gets us even more emotionally involved. And three months is about the limit most of the losers can keep up a facade. You did really well just walking away like that. I know it hurts. I was love bombed for three months before I was screamed at for absolutely nothing. I immediately walked out, but I didn't keep NC and got myself further involved. This was a few years back and not something I'll e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 08:27 PM
23

We don't chase after men who aren't sure about us. We don't "fight for them". You need to let go of the idea that you've "found the one". You haven't. "The One" would be sure about the relationship and never want to lose you. We don't obsess over men who've shown us they aren't that into us. We don't keep reaching out to them in hopes one day it'll be the right time or possibly that we'll wear them down. We LET THEM GO and (try to) remove their ability to reach out and eventually hurt us again. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 08:23 PM
3

We've all been there for sure😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 12:46 PM
9

I hope you have him blocked. I cringed at those extra paragraphs you sent explaining yourself. I would've angrily blocked by that "hard to get" comment. It was so condescending.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 11:10 AM
145

"I love how easy this is". This must've been his first time dating online😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 10:54 AM
13

I went out with some girlfriends last weekend and there was a new girl. We hit it off. I had worn a dress and the weather turned colder. I was okay, but she whipped her jacket off and put it around me. We're both into dudes, but most days I wish I could want a woman like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 03:06 AM
1

😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 02:57 AM
34

The main reason I wanted a divorce was because of MuH pEnIs. I really just wanted a permanent break from his sexual needs. That's literally the only fucking thing he cared about on top of being an overall shitty partner. I'm like 8 years free now and I'm so glad. I didn't even touch another man for three years after him. I didn't want to😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 02:46 AM
3

Here's to hoping he asks for the divorce soon and she feels absolutely grateful. She probably wants the same thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 02:42 AM
6

I had a really good partner who really took his time with me. He was a little bit younger, but had a serious, long term gf before me. Foreplay and an emotional connection are very important. We were a really close couple and I waited months before having sex with him. We're actually still friendly almost 25 yrs later.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 02:37 AM
19

If a man doesn't pay for the date, I don't see him again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 06:58 PM
6

Agreed. He should've stayed single. I even cringed at the thought of him getting a pet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 05:39 PM
17

I dated a man who told me a story about a girl that dumped him because he started ghosting her. His reason? She had an adult son with severe retardation and he realized he'd never be a priority to her. Y'all I was absolutely disgusted. I have a kid that was a priority over him. With his attitude he should've only dated childfree women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 04:44 PM
25

Yep. My ex husband. He was the one that said he was ready to have children. Then he was upset that being pregnant and eventually being put on bedrest meant I needed more help from him and wasn't as interested in sex. It was awful. Then after the baby he literally told me he was jealous of the baby. I was already sick of him by then but that was the nail in the proverbial coffin. I asked for a separation before our kid turned two. I was done. And he's still selfish ten years later.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 04:40 PM
14

A few years ago when I was dating online, one of the guys caught my interest more than the others. I later learned it was a symptom of his personality disorder. He both acted like he had to meet me because he was worried some other guy would "win" me and also acted like he didn't have time for me. We finally got a date planned and I didn't hear from him all day and turns out he "forgot". I could've saved myself a lot of heartache by just blocking and forgetting him. It really doesn't pay to excu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 04:33 PM
8

Oh lord. What a way to twin😆 I have no intention of hanging out with this girl and will unfollow her. As far as my Mom, I currently have her blocked. She's too much to deal with. I'd probably never purposely see her again, but she lives with her Mom who did a wonderful job raising me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 03:15 AM
19

I am damn near an expert on the disorder. My mom has it and I dated my first one a few years ago, undiagnosed and unwilling to seek any kind of help. I actually met a girl the other day and we chatted and added each other on fb. Immediately I noticed lots of crazy bpd memes. I asked her about it and she's a mom and has been in therapy for her bpd over a decade. Yet she's still posting constant bpd shit about being toxic and fucked up. I also noticed her posting about being on OnlyFans. If we did…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 03:05 AM
2

I was gonna say Waste of Time is MY JAM. I'll have to listen to this one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 01:56 AM
44

Nah, sis. Cluster b's can't even rely on therapy to be better people. They're too narcissistic to truly change.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 12:12 AM
49

Exactly this. He doesn't actually miss you. He misses how you made him feel and the security he had with you. Feel satisfaction all you want to, but never take that asshole back, again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 12:10 AM
24

They have brains. They just refuse to use them. It drives me insane.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 12:07 AM
20

Definitely. He would complain about her being emotional about stuff. I felt sorry for her. He seemed like an ok dad but I'm sure the girl's mom left for a reason. I did. And so did the next couple ex's. Small city lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 09:05 PM
26

💪
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 09:04 PM
41

If he bothers you again in a few months, I'd block. You told him to leave you alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 09:00 PM
28

I remember an ex saying he'd never made his daughter waffles, so I bought and wrapped a waffle maker for them as a Xmas present. I didn't even get a thank you. And then he didn't finalize our New Years plans so I dumped him with this simple text. "Please return my things at your earliest convenience". Me and my friends guessed he'd just reply "ok" and he did😆 Then he dumped my shit downstairs without a text so I just found it there on my way out. Trash.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 08:43 PM
2

I think I was more going for the idea that men are so easily embarrassed, but I was definitely not using the right circumstance and embarrassment does very often cause them to resort to violence. You were right to point it out. I even hesitated writing that and now I know why. The whole concept of needing any of that stuff is horrifying, especially a preventative that is worn internally. It would be a better product if it just cut it off immediately. We literally have to look over our shoulders …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 05:44 PM
1

You're misunderstanding me. Caught by the police was my point. Not caught by the device. Anyway, the idea that women even need this type of device is horrifying. I found this article and it was upsetting. anti
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 05:27 PM
1

That's why my first word used was CAUGHT. I wasn't thinking about him being embarrassed after a murder. I didn't even realize you went there. I definitely prefer the fire torch but there's a reason these rape prevention devices exist. But I do see how if they aren't painful then they'd fill the guy with rage. I haven't looked into them but now want to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 05:15 PM
1

I've been there. He was total and complete SHIT. Ugly, fat, ill mannered, abusive.... The sex was extremely good in the beginning and got me hooked. The longer you stay and ignore red flags, the longer it takes to get over them. This guy wasn't my first LVM obsession that took years to mentally get rid of.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 05:11 PM
3

My coworker's wife was very fat. Doctors dismissed her. Turned out she had a very large abdominal tumor.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 05:06 PM
5

I already didn't want to do marriage counseling because I was done, but my ex wanted to try. Of course the (woman) counselor didn't want to hear a single one of my grievances and kept saying that we BOTH were responsible. I think I may have walked out. I can't remember. I know I disengaged very early on and carried on with the divorce. I don't regret it one bit. I think she did my ex a disservice handling it like that because I was the one seeking divorce and he was seeking to save it. Had she b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 05:03 PM
1

The ones with teeth can only be removed by medical professionals, so at least they're caught (by the authorities). Edited*
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 04:52 PM
104

I make mental notes about what the people I date or hang around with like so that I have ideas for birthdays and Xmas. I had so much fun picking out some really cool shit for my bf of just over a year. One item I had to special order. He had seen someone's shirt in an airport and stopped the guy and said he loved his shirt, then turned to me and said "I have to get a shirt like that!" Deciding what presents to get people you spend a lot of time with should be easy. When he asked me what I wanted…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 04:48 PM
2

This is definitely divorce worthy behavior. My ex husband used to love hitting snooze 15 times before getting up, but since it badly disrupted my sleep, I made him quit like immediately. He did with zero issues. Same ex also liked falling asleep with the tv on, but this woke me in the middle of the night. Since I was able to fall asleep initially the compromise was to set a sleep timer. It worked and he never complained. My ex was a selfish LVM and your husband is a LVM-NVM. Reading your story f…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 04:26 PM
33

I grew up with that wacky, manipulative religious shit and chose to leave religion in my early 20s.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 03:57 PM
25

My narcissist ex would sometimes "joke" that I should clean his house when I was over. I said nah I don't live here😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 02:10 PM
17

Yeah a lot of what seems like HV qualities are really disordered love bombing. I had figured my HVM turned insane LVM was a narcissist, but he seemed really remorseful and self aware. That's because he was likely narcissistic AND borderline. Clearly OP gets it, but for those who don't, if they show any LV qualities, just RUN LIKE HELL. Don't be like PAST me and try to understand why they act crazy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 01:24 PM
19

If he's "too busy" to text, he's too busy to date. You should've heard from him Sunday.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 01:02 PM
32

Thanks. I still laugh about it and it was years ago. I definitely saw right through it. It was so unexpected and stupid as hell.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 09:04 PM
36

As the comments keep echoing, the ugliest and heaviest man I ever dated was the most abusive man I have ever dated. Never again. You really do think they'll appreciate you, but instead they're suspicious of you and their actions reflect that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 07:57 PM
320

And then they whine about ghosting. This is exactly why I just block them without an explanation. I had one I didn't want to see again try to reverse psychology me with "I'm not sure we're a good match". I was like OH I am so relieved you said that because I feel the same way. And then he got upset and backtracked and wanted to know why I thought we weren't a good match. Boy, bye 👋
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 07:50 PM
3

It's so sad that you have nothing better to do with your life than troll FDS and try to comment. I'd feel sorry for you, but first I'd have to give a shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 03:52 PM
2

Enjoy your ban
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 03:39 PM
2

Nasty ass, typical male🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 03:37 PM
3

I have a habit of covering up the message part so I can only see the username. I check post history and if it's a man or no post history, I block em.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 03:36 PM
1

We don't post scrote messages here. They're just looking fo attention.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 03:23 PM
2

You answered your own question. Girlfriend vs a roommate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 10:03 PM
21

I just can't figure out how to change my age or name tee-hee. Yeah, right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 07:59 PM
27

This is why women learned to block instead of letting a guy down easy. They did it to themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 07:22 PM
6

Fetish🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 07:15 PM
7

Because that's what I read from her post.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 06:31 PM
104

The only problem could be that he knows you're out of his league, becomes insecure about it, and starts shit testing you. But he may be a HVM. You just have to watch for flags. Good luck!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 03:58 PM
124

From my experience, I think 40 is the new 50😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 03:52 PM
48

I eagerly read the whole thing. It felt so good to read. Just Wow! It's funny how his reactions were all over the place, just like every male I have ever encountered. Like a user once said here and absolutely killed me with it "he went through all five stages of grief"😂 And this absolute QUEEN saw right through his attempts at manipulation and stayed so cool through it all. I got a little angry that he kept trying to turn it around on her, but males gonna male I guess🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 02:58 PM
35

Exactly. It's sad how even when the mutual friends knew exactly what kind of piece of shit he really is, they still chose to tell the story his way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 02:54 PM
11

I notice this everywhere I go. I will look around at all the men. The majority are noticeably fat. Fat all over or big, hard, round bellies. Or they're extremely skinny and look like disheveled drug addicts. Both of these types seem to have thick or long beards that gross me out. I don't care if their beard is well taken care of, I still find it unattractive. So with 99% of the men around me being of the above type, I have little options to date, so I don't.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 02:36 PM
5

The abusive ex who never had time to text or call later in the relationship is the same guy who texted or video chatted me before boarding a plane to Europe, while he waited on the tarmac, when he landed, every single day of his three week long awaited vacation, and all the way up until he landed back home. They have time when they're super into you or trying to love bomb the shit out of you to get you invested.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 02:29 PM
10

That's a great idea. Married couples are always looking to match make their friends.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 02:25 PM
17

I mean, I wish I was having more sex, but I want and demand great sex with a great man, and so I, uh...I've become used to being celibate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 01:41 PM
2

I love any distilled water but I can drink a lot of the popular bottled waters. I hate zephyrilis and Fiji. I know sparkling water is a thing in Europe. I would ask for water and get Pelligrino and then ask for tap water and literally get warned against drinking it and get weird looks😆I've recently started enjoying sparkling ferments so my opinion may have changed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 01:30 PM
27

It's going to take a long time to get to a place where you feel over him. Most of us have been there, but you will get over it. Sadness over a breakup is better than sadness and pain IN a relationship. Try to fill your life with things that make you happy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 07:47 PM
1

Probably uncomfortable laughed at the audacity. I know I would in person before I walked tf away. Only the lowest men on Earth talk to women like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 07:44 PM
6

I can not do spring water AT ALL. I'm a water snob too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 07:20 PM
9

Oh man I feel this post😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 07:19 PM
79

Don't believe him when he comes crawling back saying he wasn't thinking straight. He'll blindside you again. He told you he doesn't love you. Believe him and move on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 07:14 PM
26

Lol!! I remember those episodes! I'm of the rule of if the woman ends it because she just can't go through with it, then it's good to give it back. If he cheats or ends it, it's MINE lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 04:55 PM
65

Men can't seem to see things from other perspectives. I've noticed this a lot and even my ex told me he had that problem. I had an ex fiance's father violently corner me in his house when I went to pick up something for my fiance because he couldn't. He didn't know we were engaged and thought I swindled him out of a few grand. I was told to keep it secret until my fiance could tell his family, so I had to say I didn't know what he was talking about. He also thought I was after the maybe $25,000 …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 03:44 PM
46

Devastating 😔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 03:37 PM
18

A lot of men do a "self fulfilling prophecy" when they find a woman they really like. They think they don't deserve her or that something must be wrong with her for choosing him, so they sabotage the relationship. They don't really want to lose her, but they put her through shit tests to try and make her prove her love. It makes zero fucking sense. So your second paragraph was SPOT ON. I've never been able to be long term happy with a guy. I am very low drama and low conflict and apparently they…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 01:41 PM
14

It's not your profile. It's the vast amount of LVM on dating apps. Keep your profile simple and don't show your body off too much in your pics. Writing things specifically to keep LVM away will also keep the HVM away. One thing you can do, although it barely helps, is choose -looking for monogamy and long term, if those are options. I auto swipe left on men who have non monogamy, hookups, or looking for fun on their profile.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 01:34 PM
5

I don't do anything. I just sit there or sometimes I'll look at them so they know. If he asks me to pay anything, I consider it a friends only dinner and we don't go out again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 01:30 PM
5

I would tread carefully here. Men tend to fall for their female friends. It's a tale as old as time. One of my guy friends is still hung up on a friend who got married like five years ago. He's also hinted at me and him being a good couple🤢 I haven't had a man text me every day since I was married and that was many years ago. I don't think it's normal. It screams red flag to me. Listen to that song by Usher- You make me wanna.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 12:33 PM
17

They lack intelligence so badly that they always fight with insults, usually false ones. I'm honestly sick of men and how they don't like seeing women happy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 12:13 PM
3

It's definitely inflation. I did really well on less than 35K about ten years ago. I did go on amazing, month- long Euro vacations at least once a year while living alone. How tf did I do that? lol Right now I'm working on paying off some credit card debt so I can save more money for emergencies. But it's not easy and I'm making almost twice what I used to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 12:10 PM
12

Yeah, we don't do that anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 01:25 AM
12

Exactly. I would've been too personally offended to give him the chance to turn down the job. He showed his true self and she finally caught a glimpse. She had some rose colored glasses on to even make him that offer. I hope she vets better next time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 01:13 AM
25

Yep. 65K ain't shit, even in my very affordable city. You can pay your bills and buy necessities, but you ain't taking lavish vacations or having any real extras. Ask me how I know? 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 01:10 AM
186

The most common comment seems to be "your (sic) all just fat whale female incels". Same comment over and over from different males.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 09:43 PM
2

It makes sense. There's a lot of drama in his marriage and he probably thinks all relationships are like that. There hasn't been a single time I hung out with them that they haven't gotten into an embarrassing fight. He's borderline emotionally crippled and she thinks she can change that by making big scenes about it. They're both really disrespectful to each other. I used to really hate it but I've gotten used to it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 08:15 PM
11

I am so sick of hearing this excuse for men. I had a guy "acquaintance" tell me to my face that my ex wasn't abusive, like he dated him for a year and lived in the same apt complex as him for several months. He barely fucking knew him and knew his background, but still had the audacity to say that to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 04:15 PM
9

I always hated the poor excuse that blocking them shows you still care. No, it absolutely doesn't. Blocking means you're done with them and never want to see or hear from them again. It takes away their access to you. I blocked mine everywhere and he's blocked in real life if I run into him. I don't look in his direction or let him anywhere near me. I tried being friends and he repeatedly shit all over that, so this is all he gets from me now. Nothing. I hear ya OP.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 04:11 PM
6

Throw the whole man away. He's telling you the truth about himself. If you don't want a self proclaimed emotionless robot who can never love you, then stop wasting your time and get out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 03:41 PM
3

I don't even entertain men who can't type out a whole word.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 03:31 PM
5

Me and a friend still laugh when she refers to her ex as Stinky Dick. I don't even know his name. She loved him but it was a damn dealbreaker. I used to just straight up tell my ex he stank and he'd look at me and then jump in the shower.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 04:37 PM
21

I have never asked a man for a pic of himself. I don't care.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 04:13 PM
21

Those men are so sad. Vet well and vet hard ladies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 04:09 PM
41

This is exactly why I'm not nice to men anymore. Years and years of them thinking a friendly smile meant that I wanted them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 04:42 PM
13

I got too far into a relationship with a narcissistic because he had comorbid BPD. The sexual experience was very satisfying, unlike anything else I have ever dealt with. He was halfheartedly into the porn stuff, but overall it was all about the emotional experience because of the BPD. I'll be very wary going forward because it was hard to emotionally get out of that relationship. You feel simultaneously loved and cared about while also feeling hated and not good enough. Weird shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 06:17 PM
3

I had that happen to me, but thankfully I was aware of his NPD/BPD by that time and didn't react. The BPD caused him to feel shame. His NPD caused him to try to deflect why he felt shame.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 06:14 PM
3

Haha you're not wrong. I matched with almost no one and even the ones I matched with ended up being duds for one reason or other.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 05:58 PM
14

They tried keeping us down for years. I'm also so thankful for the women who weren't having that shit and made our lives better. It still isn't perfect and they're still trying to keep us down, but it's an improvement.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 03:31 PM
15

What a painful fucking read. Ladies, never EVER do this. Don't ever date down or settle. It really is better to be alone. You don't even need a man to have children. So many marriages with kids end up in divorce and that means years of awkwardly dealing with each other. Sometimes it's years of court battles. If you can't find a man who lives up to your standards, you don't have to give up on the idea of being a Mom.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 03:28 PM
7

This is so true. My last ex actually called himself logical and even made comments about women being hormonal. He was very scientific about it and not necessarily rude, which was weird because he was definitely an asshole. He would call himself logical or rational in arguments where he was absolutely in the wrong. And my favorite part about that is how he would tell a friend or family member his side of the argument he started, expecting them to pat him on the back, but they ALWAYS sided with me…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 03:14 PM
11

Honestly that particularly selfie has always been a NO from me and so many guys do it. Sometimes they even do it in the mirror, which makes absolutely no sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 02:38 PM
26

Looking for hookups or ok with non monogamy were instant left swipes for me. That meant I got very little matches and I was fine with it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 02:34 PM
16

I can take it or leave it, but I won't be with a man who absolutely doesn't want to do it ever. That's a red flag to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 02:28 PM
1

I knew I had picked the wrong man when my now ex husband didn't want to take me to the ER, because I felt I was going into preterm labor, because it was early and it was Sunday. I had to get nasty with him and he begrudgingly did it. I was hospitalized for a week and put on bedrest for two months. I ended up hospitalized another week later into the pregnancy. Some things are just unforgivable. If I was the woman in the story I'd be filing for divorce. Unforgivable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 02:33 AM
26

I don't accept those kind of texts. That's an instant dump from me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 11:24 PM
29

I had a round, bald loser I was dating literally poke my stomach as I was seated and say "what is that?" I'm pretty fit, so I just looked at him like he was dumb and said it was my stomach. I believe that's the last time we went out too. But he kept trying to come back around for years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 06:46 PM
21

Attention seeking behavior. Men love starting and participating in drama.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 06:41 PM
47

Sorry, but you....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 06:40 PM
79

My family and friends all say I'm an asshole, but I need the males and pick-me's of Reddit to tell me I'm not. Scrote logic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 05:58 PM
25

I like how he says he likes a girl so much that he's been so busy trying to impress her that he hasn't even thought about porn. If a guy isn't busy trying to impress me, I don't want him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 04:06 PM
17

I already knew what she looked like and clicked anyway😉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 04:04 PM
5

I'm not doing it again. I don't even want to live with a man again. I'm talking to a man with two young kids now and I have zero interest in ever even meeting his kids. I just want to date on the days we're both childfree. Even my last long term boyfriend barely saw my son. We did Halloween once and a couple parades. I just wanted to keep it separate. It's such a different attitude than I had before my marriage/divorce.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 04:01 PM
16

I was just last night watching a show where the guys all had buttons up. And I thought, why tf don't guys do that anymore? One guy always wore tshirts and he looked so much less than the other men on the show. It was beach casual and still looked 100% better than these raggedy tshirts they all seem to wear.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 03:56 PM
2

When my ex told me he was jealous of our baby, I knew the relationship was over. It was such a relief to cut him off and sleep in the other room while we got ready to separate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 05:06 PM
60

Exactly. I pushed out an entire child and have had ridiculous amounts of sex in my lifetime. I still have the "innie" that puberty and genetics gave me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 08:15 PM
8

His actions are far more important, but I think 3 months would probably be about average. Too soon and you have to worry that it's love bombing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 05:54 PM
4

He says all that at the end, but he won't get any therapy and will do the same to the next girl.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 04:33 PM
57

I can't even stand for a bearded man to look at me. It really grosses me out. Most of them don't even trim the fucking things and it goes all the way to their neck🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 04:16 PM
64

Throw the whole ignorant man away
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 04:13 PM
51

Exactly. They never like being treated like they treat us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 03:07 PM
73

YOU PEOPLE ARE SO DRAMATIC, UNLIKE ME!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 01:43 PM
6

Exactly. They say it takes about the same amount of time you were in a relationship to get over a breakup, and I have found that very true in most cases. Occasionally I would meet someone new and that person was good enough to make me forget about them quicker. My problem was less about hating my BPD/NPD ex and more about feeling lost/lonely without him, so it's different. I had to find hate to lose the feeling of loss. I did this by writing out every single hateful and thoughtless thing he ever…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 03:24 AM
22

It's so good that you didn't give him a chance to backtrack and you took that sentence at face value and noped the fuck out. Doesn't matter if it happened ten years ago, he LIED to women about a latex allergy to have unprotected sex. It's sick. I'm so glad he was stupid enough to let that slip. Many of them aren't that easy to figure out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 03:13 AM
20

😂😂😂 Let's hope he reaches acceptance😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 03:09 AM
5

Wow! Unraveled is a good word for this hot mess.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 03:06 AM
4

He's lying. He may have tried to post it but it wouldn't be approved by a mod.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 03:04 AM
6

THIS!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 03:02 AM
5

Obviously 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 03:01 AM
5

A psycho wrote that list.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 02:56 AM
11

It was a great visual😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 02:53 AM
1

Yes! Exactly 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 02:10 AM
18

Yep. Crying is being overly emotional or manipulative and anger is completely normal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 09:31 PM
137

I also hate how he wasn't all that interested in you until you lost interest. They cry about wanting woman to take the initiative sometimes but they don't respect us if we do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 07:36 PM
5

I don't understand how you can be out of his league but also he's a better person. How can you be out of his league but you didn't deserve him? Sounds like you need to do a lot of inner work to learn to love yourself more. I finally gave an ugly, overweight, physically and grossly scarred nerdy man a chance. I was completely out of his league. He was a narcissist who pretended to be exactly what I was looking for. Then the mask fell off and the abuse started. We dated for 1.5 years and it took m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 05:21 PM
14

Most of mine are too but some have women only areas that aren't like that. I quit going to the gym last year and just work out an hour before bed, in front of the tv lol. I now prefer it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 05:07 PM
6

He 100% gets off on negative attention from you that HE CREATED. They complain about clingy women and then give out the kind of behavior that makes a woman cling. I've been FDS since the 90s, so when I guy I was seeing called me clingy just for getting up and giving him a hug, he never got another unsolicited hug from me. Then he whined about how I didn't do that stuff. Same guy said I wanted sex too much, so I stopped. Then he whined that I never want sex anymore. Damned if you do and damned if…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 05:00 PM
8

I ignore my ex completely. If he gets near me I move and find some object to block him from my view, like a wall or a tree or even another person. I haven't seen him since last fall because karma took him out of the last two events he would've been at. I had started out trying to be cool, but he flip flopped so much between being nice back and ignoring me that I got tired.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 04:54 PM
3

You just dealt with a personality disordered guy. Block and never look back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 04:51 PM
10

If you contact him he's just going to find you pathetic and hurt your feelings some more. Even if he doesn't, because he's lonely, he'll quickly throw you away again. Please read the handbook and never lower yourself to his level again. It's ok to take a break and be single. Going on Tinder while you're still pining over an asshole is not going to work out well for you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 04:43 PM
26

I refuse to go to gyms with open windows to the street. I was absolutely disgusted every time I passed a girl's ballet building. Huge open windows to the main highway. It's sick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 04:39 PM
42

I find that men are the more emotional ones. Emotionally volatile.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 04:33 PM
452

All those carrots and not one of them connected to a high value man. Smh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 04:32 PM
10

You'll never change him. What he is now is what he will always be. Even if you put your foot down and head out of the relationship, he will either shrug his shoulders and let you go or tell you that he'll change and then won't. You bend over backwards for him and he won't even look up from his phone or buy you a damn coffee. You can find other ways to be social and learn an instrument. You don't have to keep him around just because that's all he's good for.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 04:31 PM
3

Lol not attractive at all and this was almost three years ago. He's long in my past.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 04:28 AM
62

"My life isn't better without you in it". Well, DUH. Stay sad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 10:03 PM
268

45 yr old men are definitely not in their prime lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 07:47 PM
24

It's 100% criminal. I'd be in shock for sure. The man is an abuser with zero conscience. These horrible stories help us stay sharp at least.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 06:25 PM
7

He got his feelings hurt by getting dumped and decided in his mind that the reasons are your fault. In reality, he got dumped because he is a disgusting piece of shit. Some guys aren't as openly disgusting as this one, so be careful. I cringed at the part where he likes to start fights for the makeup sex🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 04:56 PM
6

This!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 04:52 PM
16

One of the biggest obstacles to moving on is this desire for closure or to make sense of things. Sometimes it just doesn't make sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 04:51 PM
92

The worst part is that she thought she might be overreacting. These kind of absurd thoughts, where we don't trust our own judgment, are why we stay in shitty relationships too long.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 04:49 PM
91

According to him you should be a virgin until you get married? Same kind of dude that wouldn't dream of dating a woman who wants to wait until marriage. He won't even wait three dates. Dudes literally make zero sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 04:47 PM
12

Like I already knew people with low self esteem said stuff like this but it was a brand new experience to realize they also look down on the people who care about them FOR caring about them. It's definitely a paradox.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 04:44 PM
31

Damned if you do and damned if you don't. This is a real thing that the worst of men experience. I know because a guy I was dating told me he didn't trust my judgement because I was with someone like him. It was the weirdest thing anyone I've dated has texted me. At the time I was looking for fun, not a long term partner, and he was fun. My answer to him when he asked what I saw in him was always "chemistry", but he was right to question it. There was nothing else good about him besides chemistr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 03:38 PM
28

It's real. I experienced it. I dated well below what I could date and one day he randomly texted "why are you even with me? I don't trust your judgment because you're with someone like me." It was bizarre and eye opening. I didn't even engage. I responded "I'm not doing this tonight" and he apologized and left me alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 03:34 PM
16

In my breakup text to my abusive ex, I told him I was "done with this relationSHIT". I saw it somewhere and kept it in mind for that perfect moment😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 09:27 PM
13

I dated a Texan who pumped my gas and called his Mom ever Sunday. He also paid for all dates. But he had some serious fucking avoidance and sexual issues and had to go lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 08:29 PM
11

American southerner here, late 30s, and women paying for dates is a foreign concept to me. Down south if someone offers to pay the meal, you better stfu and let them because it's considered rude to bicker over who pays the bill. I moved up north and men here still pay for dates, especially men my age or older. I even dated an older Aussie who's lived here 20 years. He paid for every date and even said he believes men should take care of women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 08:25 PM
27

I hate them so much. I am so past due for one. I've even had a couple colposcopies and that's even worse. Then I was pregnant and had all these cervix complications and uggh you just never get used to that shit but pap smears are so important. And just because you get a bad result once doesn't mean it will keep happening. The cervix can clear abnormal cells (dysplasia) on its own most of the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 07:39 PM
8

It's a simple app. Three pics and three questions or statements. It may have changed a little bit. You can like or comment on pics or questions and if you do, the other person knows you're interested so now they can respond to you and show interest back. So so simple. But men would put the same three pictures and write the most dumb fuck answers to the questions, leaving a woman no reason to like or comment anything. Even if you do find something, there is a "your turn" option so even if you lik…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 07:33 PM
40

Just trust your first instinct. Learn not to question it when it comes to men. We all spend too much time questioning our initial emotions. We have to learn to trust them. Not only could that save us time and heartache, it could save our lives.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 05:41 PM
25

Love how he tried to pretend to be a good guy doing the right thing when the truth is he was sleeping with another woman while dating you. He even called her more sexually confident, like confidence was the problem. Thankfully your confidence in your own standards and boundaries helped you dodge that bullet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 05:15 PM
5

I could fill out an entire comment because my last serious boyfriend had a personality disorder and did everything BUT hit me. And at least two separate friends immediately asked "did he hit you?" when I told them about how abusive he'd been. One acquaintance even told me he didn't think he was abusive because he's a "good guy". Like he spent every weekend with him and vacationed with him like I did. They weren't even friends or coworkers. Smdh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 05:11 PM
18

Because she's an easy mark to continue playing emotional games with. He'll be back in a few days or weeks to see if you're an easy mark too. And then he'll keep going back and forth to both of you until one of you blocks him for life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 05:07 PM
48

As soon as he told you his intentions, you should've blocked him and moved on. I understand why you tried to talk him into choosing you, but he showed you who he was. You should've immediately lost interest and moved on. Lesson learned.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 05:03 PM
33

My ex added like five letters behind his name and I could not figure it out for awhile. He has no degree. Apparently it was one minor certification for something computery. It made him look like the pretentious asshole he is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 04:58 PM
3

Literally every other (or more) male troll trying to post here calls us femcel whales. Also I don't think I've ever seen a man get body shamed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 04:51 PM
12

I live in a decent sized city and Hinge is what made me give up entirely. The men here ruined what should've been an easy app to use.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 04:49 PM
6

I don't online date anymore because most of the men doing it are trash, but it used to be I didn't give my number until we've really been talking good and a google number is definitely the way to go. Some guys I hit it off with quicker than others but if they ask for my number before I feel like we've talked enough, I automatically lose interest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 09:29 PM
33

I learned to treat men with business like indifference. I don't return smiles or friendliness when it's just a random guy I rarely see or probably won't see again. It has really cut down on men acting weird around me. I went out kayaking with an acquaintance recently and that did not go well. I 100% did not flirt with this man but he's clearly interested and kept sending me cringey texts that I would ignore. The last long and embarrassing text I responded with "wow that was a lot lol" and thankf…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 04:25 PM
5

Oldest boy, younger than me. We have different but equally neurotic mothers. He and his LV brother had the exact same upbringing. I think a lot of it comes down to personality (attitude, empathy) and will power. He wanted to be a good man and molded himself into one. My LV brother would rather blame other things than look at himself. That whole side of the family struggles horribly with obesity. He beat obesity in his teens and never stopped working at it. He is fit as fuck. His LV brother tried…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 04:17 PM
13

I've learned from experience to just block them and not give them a chance to make excuses. After worrying himself to death about whether I would "pick him" while online dating, the guy "forgot" our simple and low effort date plan. I made him grovel and make it up to me, but he ended up having a personality disorder AND ADD and he was a nightmare to get over.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 04:06 PM
3

We don't give a shit about that obviously low value boy and neither should you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 02:31 PM
16

This shit and the brain dead ones that couldn't carry a conversation if their life depended on it are the reason I quit OLD altogether.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 02:29 PM
6

2 out of my 3 brothers are low value. The third is a married, family man who 100% puts his wife and kids first. I'm so insanely proud of him. I've seen him put our LV brother in his place because our LV brother can't stand how well he treats his wife. He's a MRA and believes giving women rights ruined America. He tries to be subtle about it because he does respect me, but I can read between the lines. I once told him sarcastically to keep taking the red pill and he said he absolutely plans on it…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 01:51 PM
5

I can't be friends with an LVM, not really. I know one I tried to be friends with before I realized he was trash, so I have turned him into more of an acquaintance. I don't have any male friends that I really love and respect.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 01:39 PM
25

Yep. Sounds like she's downgrading with this man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 09:11 PM
65

You were smart to end it. My coworker's husband decided that after ten years together, and many deployments where she was left alone, he wanted to get another certification at work and start going on more deployments. He asked for a divorce. She wanted kids. Now she's early 30s and who knows if she'll find another man she wants to have children with. Of course he's tried to coming crawling back several times but she's done with him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 09:08 PM
34

That time I fixed my (ex) husband's bathroom sink because I was tired of him using mine. It cost me like a $2 pack of rubber seals and I had no experience, just plain common sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 06:24 PM
3

I know a lot of women wait until this behavior adds up before they end up leaving the relationship, but that will never be again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 04:35 PM
1

I love that it was brought to my attention because it really is weird and petty. But they are clearly begging from attention from us. They clearly were trolling our page and saw the last couple posts and want to act like victims of trolling. I didn't see it but it had over a thousand comments so who knows🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 10:33 PM
60

Men keep me off dating apps. Bless em.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 10:25 PM
1

Agreed. Their post is definitely free publicity. But clearly they are looking for attention from us. I'll bring this to the mods.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 10:19 PM
46

Never second guess yourself. Just get rid of the problem, the man making you second guess yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 09:52 PM
49

Good lord. Wall of controlling text. So glad he's your ex. Next time a guy even talks a little bit like this one, get rid of his ass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 09:51 PM
6

It was definitely both. Never again. That relationship was a lesson well earned lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 09:20 PM
16

She wrote a whole ass paragraph about HER experience and THIS was your response. Make your own comments.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 09:01 PM
1

At this point I don't even want to give them the publicity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 08:57 PM
105

Post bikini pics to see how gross and perverted I can make the conversation. Uh, no thanks, I think I'll just unmatch and block ✌️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:39 PM
33

When you value a religious, rapist perv over your own children. Smmfh😔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:30 PM
18

I knew my relationship was over when my ex hurt my feelings and completely ignored me when it caused me to cry. I never showed him my tears or emotions again and he didn't like that either. Go figure 🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:28 PM
8

Jealous, control freak. I don't understand men that are like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:26 PM
2

I think some people don't pay attention to their phone settings, but I only turn mine on when I want to be petty, so I get what you're saying. If a guy I was dating had them on and was consistently reading my texts and not responding, I'm dumping him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:24 PM
11

I had a crazy coworker who was way above me in pay grade tell me he did this with any woman he dated. He didn't like having to travel to them so he paid for them to move closer and paid the rent difference. It screamed RED FLAG to me even though I liked him as a person. I once dated a guy who wouldn't drive over ten miles to date a girl, yet he'd drive 40+ and sit in border traffic to hang out with his dad or his male friends. He seemed HVM but this turned me off real fucking quick and I dumped …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:22 PM
195

This reminds me of the time I sent a 1800 Flowers bear to a guy's work for Valentines. Before V Day He showed his ass and I dumped him. I also rerouted the bear to a hold facility and regifted it to my kid😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:18 PM
16

I'm not interested in dating at all. I'll never try to force something with what appears to be a good man and I'm afraid the only men who'll approach me will end up being wanna-be players. But I just don't worry about it. If it's meant to be it will happen. In the meantime I'll just live my life and keep my standards high. I'll never ignore a red or yellow flag again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:13 PM
34

I had to quit last year. It just wasn't worth digging through trash hoping to find some treasure.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:11 PM
14

I recently had a dude I wasn't even interested in claiming he was sorry he didn't text back because he was busy. Like dude, I didn't even ask so you obviously know it's wrong. In order to be a fuckboi you actually need to be somebody I want to fuck 🤡 I dumped a dude last summer for suddenly texting less and using the busy excuse. I'm sick of these dudes and it's why I took a break. Possibly a permanent break. They don't seem worth the aggravation and let down anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:09 PM
52

Who's Tommy? Also that looks like a fit body to me. I can't stand men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:05 PM
85

Porn absolutely ruins men. It ruins their mind and their sexuality and makes them garbage partners.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:03 PM
3

How about "the company has been going through some management changes and I decided it might be best to see what else is out there". If they press you say you don't think it's professional to explain any further but that you're excited to work for their company.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:00 PM
3

I get what you're saying. I moved states so I was able to use that as an excuse. There's people out here getting fired (my ex, my coworkers) and they're moving onto new jobs with no problem. My ex has had three different jobs since we broke up two years ago. It's bizarre anyone still hires him😆 I'm stumped for ya. I only ever leave a job because of moving so it's super easy. I used to move every year or two. But I have a kid now and need to stay put until he's done with school. Let us know how i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:52 PM
6

Nope. I blocked both his profiles and called it a day. I still laugh and repost every year though😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:45 PM
29

My ex was obsessed with his Hyundai sedan and acted like it was the shit. I never understood it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:45 PM
121

He is so disgusting. One of these guys who thinks having a nice car makes him attractive and he's "throbbing"🤢🤢🤢 Men start looking disgusting after 35. Even if they keep the weight off, their chest starts to look like it's melting. I'm late 30s, I know what I'm talking about unfortunately.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 05:24 PM
16

I was going to suggest what you already came up with. You could no longer move up in the company and decided it was time to move on. It felt stagnant. I left a nasty company before I came to the one I'm at now. They've went corporate and the same things are happening, but at $13 and hour more, I can cope lol. I gave them reference numbers only for my superiors who agreed with me. I didn't want them calling corporate and hearing about my three page exit letter that I wrote more for the people I l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 05:16 PM
0

He's making fun of women with low standards. But I'm sure he'd also complain about women who expect to be treated well. You honestly can't win, so might as well have high enough standards to weed these pieces of shit out. This is a big reason we demand high effort dates to high end restaurants and well thought out date activities. This man here thinks women that can be wooed with coffee and fast food are easy and therefore low value, but I guarantee he can't afford an FDS woman. Male hypocrisy n…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 05:09 PM
2

Good. I don't see any other way. If you stay with this guy, he'll never stop playing the victim and expecting you to apologize. Better to cut your losses and refuse to let men like him in your life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 04:40 PM
1

Just be done with him, sis. He's not sorry and he's trying to turn this around on you and that is going to keep happening. I had a guy make plans with me a week in advance for a Saturday night. I didn't hear from him all week, so pre FDS I asked him Saturday morning if the plans were still on. He apologized, said he should've texted me throughout the week, and said plans were DEFINITELY still on. An hour or so before the date he gives me like three excuses why he can't come out and then has the …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 04:13 PM
8

Trash 🗑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 03:55 PM
20

I found that so bizarre.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 03:54 PM
21

wHaT aBoUt MeN?!!!🙃
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 03:53 PM
78

She makes far too many excuses for this guy. She feels sorry for him. I hate the way she explains how he feels, like she could possibly know. He showed her exactly how he feels when he left her (and probably cheated on her) for a new woman and is now stringing both women along.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 03:47 PM
8

They think we'll jump at the chance to serve them🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 02:34 PM
9

Did you ever see this? I had an ex like that and I did choose to divorce and parent our child separately from him. And I'm so glad I did. I had warned him and warned him. I had a bf later who wouldn't stop leaving the dish scrub in the sink when there was a dish scrub holder on the edge of the sink. It angered me to no fucking end and I did end up dumping him for other reasons. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.huffpost.com/entry/she-divorced-me-i-left-dishes-by-the-sink_b_9055288/amp
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 02:33 PM
11

We don't do that here. Posts with usernames will be removed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 02:14 PM
17

Omg I got one of those from a guy I went to high school with, so 20 fucking years ago. He sent it randomly and said "what would you do with that?" It was skinny and crooked. I put some stickers on it and posted it so our mutual friends could see what a nasty fuck he was.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 02:13 PM
6

God that was painful. They're so ignorant.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 02:09 PM
6

If you're feeling confused, you have to let that man go. You can't romanticize the few, seemingly good qualities he has. The reality is that he's not good for you and you have to work on moving on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 02:07 PM
5

Ew. Throw him back. Block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 02:04 PM
91

I'm not at all surprised since most of them don't even want to use condoms.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 01:58 PM
14

You got them all! Naturey🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 01:43 PM
7

I've had a "nice guy" showing interest lately. He seems normal and is tall and relatively attractive. In person he won't stfu about his childhood traumas. He's mid 40s for god sake. In text, he says weird shit like "I enjoyed the eye candy" and "darn I forgot my hug" after just hanging out with him. He'll take 24 hours or more to respond to a text or will just text 24 hours later without actually responding to the last question. I may or may not get an unsolicited "hey I meant to text but I wAs …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 01:36 PM
10

Do you see him trying to make the hobbies sexual as well? First paragraph, last sentence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 01:29 PM
13

I don't like his first paragraph, last sentence. Feels like he's using the hobbies to try and be sexual🤢 Always go with your first instinct.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 01:27 PM
3

Once a man blocks you, do not EVER under any circumstances EVER speak with him again. Do not let men continue to be disrespectful to you. Level up Sis.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 06:57 PM
10

😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 06:52 PM
1

My ex would ask me to pick something from my dvd collection and five minutes in start complaining about how lame it was and walk off to play video games. He never did that when I picked something I hadn't already watched and loved. It was such weird behavior. And I only experienced it with one guy, the worst one I ever dated.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 04:25 PM
4

I don't really understand your point. You're calling women privileged for spotting an early red flag? You're saying this doesn't make a man low value but it shows lack of empathy? You're saying dumping a man for this is privileged but it also means he doesn't care and you should dump him? Your comment is all over the place confusing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 03:32 PM
22

I've used this idea when asked about threesomes. I tell them I'm only interested in threesomes with another man. They get really disgusted and tell me absolutely not😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 07:12 PM
6

BLOCK
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 05:32 PM
39

Right? I dump men for even asking because I know they will keep asking even if I say no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 05:25 PM
46

You've given us enough examples. You should block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 05:12 PM
34

That man will pull you in and push you away only as long as you allow it. That honest, moment of clarity, that he had is not a reason to think that deep down he is a good man who will one day improve. He sounds disordered. Congratulations on your accomplishments.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 12:45 AM
50

Scram lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 09:46 PM
14

The way he came clean at the end. Wow! I can't believe she put up with that shit for over a year. My narc ex used to pick on my laugh until he got dumped. I gave him another chance and he started right back up. He negged me about quite a bit as he was grasping at straws to find something to lower my self esteem. Thankfully that's not possible. I accidentally caught a wanna be fuckboi's interest a couple weeks ago. I'm not interested AT ALL but we have mutual friends and I've been polite. He sent…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 06:24 PM
3

Sounds like you're already in an uneven marriage and aren't even married. It sounds horrible. Your story reminds me why I'll never do this shit again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 05:49 PM
104

He went through a lot for you over two dates😂😂😂 What a psycho.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 08:16 PM
13

I see now. You could respond, "Yeah, it sucked." Leave it about your experience and leave it at that. Short responses only.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 08:15 PM
16

If you don't have any children together, I wouldn't respond. This is likely just a reason to keep communication open. I share a child with my ex husband and need to keep communication as positive as possible. So even if I did respond, it couldn't be what he actually deserved to hear lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 08:10 PM
4

Same. Not in NYC here either. I don't have any girlfriends without cars. Actually I don't know anyone else without a car at all. And this guy never offered me gas $ either. I'm sorry, but if you are 50 yrs old and live in a sprawling county like this one, you should have your own transportation. You can get a beater for a grand.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 07:56 PM
10

Haha I can concur about Gemini and Aquarius😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 06:57 PM
10

The next time a man makes you uncomfortable in any way, ANY WAY AT ALL, just leave and block EVERYWHERE. You don't have to explain yourself, and trying to get them to understand that they're wrong is a complete waste of your time. They don't care. I'm glad you found us❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 06:20 PM
11

Uggh. One of my friends who is 50 years old hasn't owned a car in literal years. We can never do anything unless I pick him up and drop him off. Or if it's nearby he takes an uber. He's honestly trash and I never hang out with him anymore. I became exhausted with his poor life decisions and lack of a vehicle. I can not even imagine trying to date one of these guys. I can't even handle just being their friend. You absolutely should not settle for the sake of not being single. That's how you end u…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 06:17 PM
16

Maybe but probably he's just a pos who wouldn't even check on you or text you regularly anyway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 05:23 PM
25

I read the whole thing. He sounded absolutely terrible. I'm glad he's blocked so he can't reach out again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 05:09 PM
38

It's funny because if I feel a date isn't going well and I never want to see them again, I offer to pay my half when the bill comes. They usually won't let me. I had one ask me if I wanted to flip a coin because it's 2000-whatever and I just said nah I'll pay for mine. Then he wanted a kiss at the end and I just said no lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 04:23 PM
40

Woooow. I just got back from breakfast with an old workmate. She's been unemployed since Feb. And she still insisted on paying.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 04:17 PM
25

Look up trauma bonds. I went through that with an abusive ex and it was hell. Some dudes I just bond more strongly with unfortunately. You really really want it to work and it just can't for so many reasons, yet you find it so hard to let go. It takes a good year or more to break that bond enough to let another man in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 02:44 AM
29

I'd have blocked when I didn't hear from him at a decent hour on Friday.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 02:33 AM
3

This is GOLD!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 02:08 AM
79

These are FACTS. I know I've looked like an easy mark to LVM before because I'm not from the area and had shitty parents. Thankfully I've been FDS since as long as I can remember and am quite good at getting rid of men who display even yellow flags. I remember telling a man that I was thinking of dating that I had a wonderful relationship with my child's father. He tried to make me feel bad about that. He was jealous and trying to argue with me that ex's should never be civil. He was super conde…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 01:24 AM
56

It'S bIoLoGiCaL. You can't get more typical man than that. He literally made no sense with that. And he's a big reason I am so damn picky and would just rather not date at all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 11:19 PM
60

You tell him it's over and he turns it around so that he's the one saying it's over. 😂 CLASSIC I was not feeling a dude I went on a date with AT ALL. The next day he texted me saying we weren't a good match and I was so relieved that I was all YES I AM SO GLAD YOU FEEL THE SAME AS ME! He did not take that well at all and kept trying to backtrack and make me feel bad for agreeing with him😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 11:14 PM
7

Mine asked for Batgirl last year because he said the motorcycle was cool and it would give his favorite cousin a doll to play with❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 08:35 PM
15

Exactly. Issue with the parents, not with gender. My son has an obscene amount of stuffed animals and cartoon blankets. He also would bring toy cars and legos to bed to sleep with. His bed is currently covered in toys😂 If the kid did not express interest in stuffed animals, maybe that's why he didn't get any.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 08:12 PM
11

That's what I was going to comment, but better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 07:53 PM
8

You're free now! Never stop leveling up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 07:46 PM
16

He sounds like trash to me. Good riddance!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 07:44 PM
10

We have to advocate for ourselves. Sometimes it's rerouting our inner voices to healthier thoughts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 07:39 PM
40

My mom is a mentally disordered pickmeisha who is also mean as shit. I had to let her go. She won't listen to reason. She doesn't call for advice. She calls to cry about the shitty men she's obsessed with. I currently have her ass blocked and dread running into her when I visit HER mom that raised me and did a damn fine job. I know it's hard when it's your Mom. I definitely don't expect you to be as harsh on yours. But lord if you think it would help, go for it. We shouldn't have to parent our p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 07:38 PM
31

I learned early that it's no way to live to dwell on the past and worry about things I have no control over. Like this pandemic. I worried myself into drinking and snacking before bed. I finally had to get ahold of myself, let it go as well as I can, and get back into my fitness and health routine. Five pounds lost so far and I'm fit again. I also got myself into a really cool and healthy hobby that I can do at home. Sometimes I will think of something I'm ashamed of, but I can't change the past…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 07:32 PM
20

Stern? Obey? Please get some much needed therapy and stay away from women until you become a decent human being.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 05:57 PM
12

The attempt at grooming is strong with this one🤢 What the actual fuck is wrong with men? I can't deal with them anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 05:52 PM
34

This. Just never compromise too much. It's so important to have boundaries.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 05:51 PM
8

Breakups hurt, no matter what. Just like being ghosted hurts. But we lick our wounds and move on to better things. The worst thing we can do is carry on in terrible relationships for the sake of not wanting to hurt for a little bit. Usually the relationships hurt worse than the actual breakup. You saved yourself the pain and ripped the bandaid off. You did good❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 05:49 PM
8

Men just have no self awareness whatsoever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 05:46 PM
3

I have a son and I'm right there with you. He's still little and so damn lazy. I guess he can just do the job over and over until it's right🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 05:31 PM
4

haha true. But I actually don't even do blowjobs like that. I refuse to put that shit in my whole mouth and risk puking or stressing out my jaw. The dudes I dated were super into my technique so I see no reason to change.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 05:19 PM
3

I no longer make excuses for them. It never works out well for women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 05:15 PM
2

I came here after being single for just over a year and googling a phrase:)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 05:01 PM
2

I think my "friends" were hoping to set me up with this guy. He added me on fb but he kept posting really narcissist shit. So I deleted him and ranted about it without saying who it was. One of my friends reached out to say his post sucked but maybe I should discuss it with him. THE FUCK?! And next thing I know he was messaging me that she said I was mad and asking why I hated his post. I was steadfast but he was constantly downplaying and gaslighting. I told our other friend about it and he jus…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 04:56 PM
2

God they are pitiful. My ex acted a lot like this and it really burned me up. It's funny how they can't stand to be treated the way they treat women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 04:50 PM
1

I actually found FDS by just randomly looking online for memes to the effect of "why do men expect everything and give nothing in return?". As soon as I arrived at this sub, I knew I found my people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 04:48 PM
5

My ex literally started acting like he hated me a couple months before I dumped his ass. How can you hate someone but also not want to break up. It made zero sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 04:35 PM
5

My friend's EX walked over her body while she was in a thyroid crisis. I really do hope that's why she dumped him. I only heard the story from a mutual friend.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 04:33 PM
1

But at her age and already having kids, it especially didn't make sense to make it so hard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 04:28 PM
3

Ignorance just isn't a good excuse. We have the internet and thousands of books. I search things I don't understand while reading articles. Men can do the same.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 04:22 PM
2

I'm honestly afraid to date anymore. The last guy I talked to mentioned putting his hand around my neck and squeezing. He didn't understand why that didn't turn me on. I absolutely do not do any kind of porn shit. No anal, no facials, absolutely no face fucking. I have a feeling that even the more vanilla stuff that isn't really vanilla is going to be a no from me in the future. I'd honestly rather be alone than feel like sex is a show I have to put on. I don't understand why it can't just be tw…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 04:02 PM
3

The first time I went down on this one dude I was interested in, he starts trying to critique and "train" me. I stopped and never put my mouth anywhere near it again. We remained friends for awhile and I brought it up. He told me he was disgusted with himself. Good.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:57 PM
9

Men have made me asexual. I'm starting to loathe them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:54 PM
4

I still think he was using it as an excuse or angle. It's over now and no longer your problem. I know it's hard not to care after twelve years, but this is a very selfish man who would never dream of caring about you like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:52 PM
1

I never have and I never will. I don't even want dudes doing this to me. It feels wrong. I had one ex who would hold and kiss mine while he was on top and I admit I liked it, but it took some getting used to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:49 PM
8

My new coworker had a very similar story. He just one day told her he didn't want to be married anymore. She went through countless long deployments with him and was waiting to start a family soon. Now that they're divorced he has tried to get her back several times, but she is not having it. I'm happy for her and I am happy for you. I can't believe he refused to stop speaking with her. That was truly the nail in the coffin and he did you a huge favor. I'm just sick that he's now trying the ment…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:34 PM
2

I dated a 39 yr old once who after I told him I had a yeast infection asked me if I was sure it wasn't an STD. I dumped his dumb ass. I'm too smart to date idiots.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:20 PM
1

I'd love to see him truthfully explain that divorce to people😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:16 PM
3

Damn. You probably "felt loose" because he turned you on and made you wet. He turned what should've been a compliment to him into something ugly. They've ruined their dicks and have no idea how vaginas work and don't want to learn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:14 PM
4

I try to act as neutral with men as I possibly can. I'm more commonly dismissive of them because I don't want them taking my being polite for flirting. Most of the random delivery pickups we have are men that are WAY too excited to talk to me for less than two minutes. The professional delivery guys that drop off do not act like this and I am very thankful for that. I still don't compliment them. If I tried it would go something like this: "You don't smell like cigarettes today. Nice!" "You real…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:03 PM
40

I'm at that age where ED is definitely a thing and they 100% don't want to talk about. It was a part of why I ended those relationships and one of them ghosted me after being completely unable to even get his dick to twitch. He was well below me in looks and older, so he should've been ecstatic to have the chance. Instead, not a peep about it. In the cases of the guys I experienced this with, I believe most of it was porn use and poor diet with no exercise. The guy who's dick was limp af had exp…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 02:37 PM
12

You don't even have to be desperate or a pickmeisha in order to give people chances. It's human and should be a good trait to have. But it absolutely does not pay off. I learned this as well. First sign or bullshit or something feeling off, I'm tf out of there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 02:27 PM
8

Some of these men and even lib fems play the long game, so definitely beware.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 02:25 PM
61

I'm noticing this too. The dating pool is rancid. Searching for a good man with empathy, who also takes care of himself, is like searching for a needle in a haystack.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 02:23 PM
124

This shit makes me glad I'm older. We still have fuckbois but it's not as rampant. On the negative side, I deal with a generation of men who think that if they work they don't have to cook, clean, or care for children. They think it's a woman's job even if she also works.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 02:02 PM
55

An older guy who had always dreamed of sleeping with me offered to fly me to Vegas and I'd stay in his room, but then he said I'd have to pay for the return trip. I didn't go😂 We had this really flirty thing back in the 90s, but I was only 16 to his 23 so nothing happened. He reached out about two years ago and I was game, but I'm not traveling to you bro. I'm not paying for flights or hotels. I'm not THAT curious😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 12:35 PM
36

I don't either and that's why I'm not even all that interested in giving another man a chance. I'm tired from years of giving chances lol. I've been single over two years now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 04:16 AM
23

Most me are like that though🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 04:06 AM
89

I dated a fat, fugly, prematurely aging nerd and was still treated like shit. I'll from now on only date genetically blessed men who take care of themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 04:05 AM
2

Uggh when I zoomed in I felt like I was looking at the shadow king from that show Legion. His eyes are horrifying. In fact, his message seems more like projection at his own genetic faults.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:52 AM
1

bahahaha
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:47 AM
28

haha me too😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:24 AM
47

If I had dumped a guy for doing this shit to me, I wouldn't have ended up in an abusive relationship. Tread carefully.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 02:47 AM
0

Good for you and for her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 02:17 AM
16

I experienced that just a little bit with a narcissist. I'd try to avoid coming over after an illness and he'd say he didn't care because he wanted to take care of me. But he was the meanest pos I ever dated.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 02:13 AM
14

Good for you❤️ I understand getting stuck until things make more financial sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 02:11 AM
28

I was taught in school that some patients will refuse to acknowledge their condition and expect their partner to handle everything. Do you know that every time I experienced this it was a man refusing and expecting the wife to handle it? I still couldn't believe it even when I witnessed it. I tried a few times to educate a patient about his MAJOR procedure that needed to be tended to for the rest of his life. His response? "NO. My wife is handling all of that. You have to talk to her."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 02:09 AM
2

We didn't have internet, let alone dating apps and free porn at our fingertips. And the porn nowadays is absolutely outrageous. The last two 40+ guys I dated were completely porn sick. One of them tried to talk sexy to me once and started talking about choking me. He asked me how I was liking it and I said uh, you lost me at choking. Thankfully I've only been begged for anal a couple times. They're SICK and I want no part of it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 12:59 AM
3

Damn. No words....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 10:09 PM
186

Reminds me of an ex who wouldn't finger me because he was afraid I enjoyed it more than his dick. He literally said those words.🤦🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 10:05 PM
24

One of my biggest mistakes was thinking something was just "par for the course". From here on out, I just next them and stay single as long as I need to. I understand the frustration.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 10:02 PM
16

I feel like I said "ok, good for her" and meant it. Funny enough. I unblocked him almost ten years later and he damn near immediately noticed and messaged me. Are you surprised that they were divorced and he wanted to fly to see me? I wasn't at all interested and ended up blocking him again when he went on a whole ass rant about his now ex wife and how everything is always a woman's fault. He wasn't even trying to piss me off, but he sure af did. But I just blocked without another word.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 11:41 PM
40

Same. Gen X. Same experience. Boys asked me out. Wrote me poems and letters. Made me mixed tapes. Called me every night. Bought me cards and gifts for holidays. Planned and paid for dates, even if their Mom had to pick me up and take me home. God I miss it lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 07:50 PM
23

The guy is giving me weird vibes. Please be careful. They often show their true colors within a few months. The worst ones try to get emotionally intimate fast so that you'll be too invested to leave when you should. This guy is saying some weird shit that makes me worry for you. It's not always a good thing when they make us comfortable enough to tell them such intimate things about ourselves. Sometimes it's a narcissist playing one of their sick games.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 07:45 PM
49

I gave a beautiful ring back once. A year later he reached out to brag about the bigger and better ring he got his new fiance lol. Only the lowest man would try and recycle a ring from a broken engagement.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 07:34 PM
66

So true. Almost every male I see looks like shit. None of them give a shit what they look like or how they dress.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 07:31 PM
33

I was in a long term with a man who smiled with his eyes, but anytime I tried looking into them I got a really uncomfortable feeling. I always had to look away. I've never experienced that before and will listen to my inner voice from now on. Most of my memories of him are of him being nasty to me for no reason.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 08:36 PM
73

Throw the whole man away. What the hell is wrong with men? They live in a fantasy world while we live in reality.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 08:07 PM
3

I didn't know men stood up to poo. Learn something new every day. Also, I'd rather stay single than date a man who believes any of this shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 05:22 PM
1

This is exactly it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 04:29 PM
71

Yep. That shows he didn't even care enough to have a conversation first. Just hey, wanna hang out?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 04:12 PM
4

I have no idea because if they are bad at sex with me, I'm the fuck out of there. I've had more guys who started out great in bed and then got lazy. I left them too. I told one I'm wasn't gonna waste my time fucking him anymore if he didn't figure out what the problem was. Surprise, he didn't.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 12:53 AM
7

Ha I was about to marry a guy but ended it because shit was getting weird with him. I literally came home to his titanium (cheap) wedding band balanced on my door knob. I guess he wanted to hurt my feelings. I took a walk and tossed it into the nearest water run off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 08:55 PM
42

Ha I was about to marry a guy but ended it because shit was getting weird with him. I literally came home to his titanium (cheap) wedding band balanced on my door knob. I guess he wanted to hurt my feelings. I took a walk and tossed it into the nearest water run off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 08:54 PM
20

My question is WHY was she still with this loser?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 06:50 PM
7

I only read the first sentence but it was a whole rant. I love to think about them wasting their time ranting and nobody sees it😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 06:49 PM
3

I'm pretty content with a full size body pillow. In winter I wrap a heated blanket around it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 04:39 PM
46

Honestly it feels so good to just never reply and block everywhere.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 04:37 PM
9

Imagine being such a loser that you troll female only spaces to write out a whole ass comment that no one can or will read.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 04:35 PM
9

Yet here you are on Reddit, unable to mind your own business and go do something else.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 04:34 PM
4

🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 01:36 AM
9

Do you have family or good friends that can help you? That would be my first move.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 06:30 PM
18

Like when they're ages don't match and they claim they can't change it😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 06:20 PM
31

They all use some excuse to get off the apps as quickly as possible. The apps worked fine for me so I never understood it. I guess I've learned it's so they can ask for nude pics or send them without getting reported.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 04:32 PM
24

🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 12:34 PM
1

OH NO!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 03:33 AM
7

This scares the shit out of me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 04:07 PM
298

I hate beards, so my ex shaved his. When I saw it I told him he could grow it back😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 04:04 PM
132

My doctor told me this when I told her I'd just ended an abusive relationship. She said it's a good idea to tell them "no" early on so that you can gauge their reaction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 03:47 PM
13

I really do hate that I chose to google my ex's behavior instead of just ending it. I found out about borderline pd and managed to feel sorry for him. Uggh. I dragged out that relationship far longer than it should've lasted. I'm happy you finally got free of it and wish you the best.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 03:38 PM
43

I just tell them I don't have sex without an emotional connection. I get proposals here and there. I went out years ago with a guy from work. I had such a surprisingly good time. I'd been single for years and wasn't looking for anything. At the end of the date, this fool sexually proposes me. He joked about the look on my face for a year. He said my whole face just dropped lol. I didn't even have to say anything haha. He ended up pursuing a relationship with me and we dated for awhile until his …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 03:33 PM
26

My excruciating period pain never came back after I gave birth. Occasionally it will be bad enough to disrupt my sleep, but nothing like it was before. I get it every three weeks now instead of four and now I'm just waiting on menopause to give me relief 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 03:23 PM
17

This is so true. I've noticed it with many men I've dated. They are VERY threatened by black men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 11:08 AM
13

This was my favorite part😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 11:00 AM
27

It WaS jUsT a JoKe!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 10:54 AM
8

We were in a relationship. I didn't hear from him for several days, which was normal for him. But it's not something I would tolerate again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 03:09 AM
2

Now the new post makes sense. What a time wasting, gas lighting pos he is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 09:57 PM
50

They can't even respect themselves, so of course they can't respect a woman. Lord I just remembered the time an ex texted "why are you even with me?" and then went on to explain that he doesn't trust my judgment because I'm with someone like him". We were deep into a relationship, so I just told him I wasn't doing that right now and he apologized and disappeared 😂 I really should've insta-dumped.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 09:44 PM
7

He's actually bragging about a flesh light filled with mayo? The fuck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 08:49 PM
17

That's what I was wondering 🤦🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 08:46 PM
11

Please. I can't even be nice to a man without him thinking or hoping it means I'm interested. FDS helps me vet ruthlessly for my own wellbeing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 12:53 PM
20

Every. Time. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 08:49 PM
3

lmao
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 05:45 PM
8

You can't have a solid and equal relationship with a man who is that unstable financially and emotionally. Good luck ending it. From the way you describe him it may end up being pretty rough. I definitely recommend ending it in public or over the phone and then watching your back for awhile.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 05:43 PM
2

No usernames
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 03:15 PM
32

If the OP is Australian, then she knows that. Still doesn't mean a strange man online should use that term with her. I wouldn't appreciate some rando calling me a "bad bitch" either.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 03:12 PM
9

Same. I'm in another area than those and it's all there. Even the trophy deer and fish😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 02:24 AM
24

And holding up their fish!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 02:23 AM
17

Exactly!! We're each responsible for our own mental health.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 04:34 PM
18

He's absolutely not going to get any better. What you described is a tale as old as time. I have been there over and over again with live in boyfriends, a fiance, and even a husband. I don't regret leaving any of them. It's even possible to handle your own divorce paperwork if you don't think he'll fight you on anything. It only cost about $350 in my state to do it yourself. No lawyer. No court appearance. Just filed paperwork with signatures and notarization.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 04:33 PM
20

When I started to separate from my ex husband and moved into the spare room, he couldn't even keep his room clean. His one responsibility. I walked in one day and the floor was covered in dirty clothes and the king size bed was covered in unfolded clean clothes with just a tiny spot for him to sleep. Meanwhile I took care of our kid in the morning, kept the house picked up, went to the gym, dropped kid off at the sitter, and then went to one of my two pt jobs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 04:21 PM
38

I am so tired of the "maybe he's depressed" excuse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 04:18 PM
5

My "favorite" gyno experience was going in 1000% sure I wanted my nexplanon out (I bled CONSTANTLY) and telling her how happy I was to get it out, only for her to last minute offer to prescribe me more drugs so I can keep the nexplanon but possibly have more regular periods. Nah I want OFF the drugs. I want to be normal again. And I have never been happier since taking it out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 01:52 PM
6

So when you get offended they can say GEEZ IT WAS JUST A JOKE. YOU'RE TOO SENSITIVE.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 09:34 PM
2

It's very early. It took me at least a year to mentally let go of my abusive ex. Writing down every instance of abuse I could think of was a huge step in my recovery process. I didn't think to do that for a long time, but noticed thoughts of the abuse wouldn't go away. They basically went away when I wrote it out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 09:33 PM
22

Nah. It wasn't a simple, drunken venting. His mask fell off. He really was only going to get worse from here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 09:29 PM
7

I don't understand why this excuse for men has so many upvotes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 04:04 PM
38

You're right. Hate is an emotion. You still feel some kinda way even if you don't want them back. Indifference towards them is when you know you're over it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 03:27 PM
4

It's not that I don't want to date, it's that the men on all of the dating apps are too lame for me. I haven't been on OLD since last fall and have no interest in wading through that shit hole again. That's where I met my worst ex and that took me a good year to get over.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 07:51 PM
9

What a weird thing for a man to say to his girlfriend. This could be the starting point for more weird shit. How long have you two been dating? The real him could be starting to appear. I'd be tempted to ask him soon if he's starting to get a receding hairline because he's looking thin up top.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 07:47 PM
80

I had an ex who would tell me that what happens in our relationship is our business only and not to be telling anyone, yet EVERY SINGLE TIME he acted irrationally angry about something and I disappeared and went radio silent because of it, he would tell a friend or a family member what happened to see what their opinion was. He wanted them to take his side and it was always so bad that they never did😂And then he'd tell me they called him an asshole and half apologize while also shifting blame to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 12:53 AM
4

Imagine having to deal with men commenting stupid shit on a women only sub🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 06:35 PM
2

I felt this comment for sure. I'm very assertive, dominant, and really just able to handle anything on my own, but I am also super feminine and am into masculine men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 05:45 PM
8

I've been there over and over again and it's why I'm burnt out now. I'm happy to stay single and honestly a little scared to put myself out there and try to trust again. I've never had to deal with blatant rejection simply because I force men to chase me if they want my time and attention. This doesn't stop me from ending up with NVM/LVM that I have to eventually dump or we just kinda ghost each other. A lot of shitty men will chase and pull out all the stops to get your heart, only to drop the …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 05:41 PM
13

I hope she gets picked🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 05:28 PM
21

I have the entire thing on my fb memories and it is beautiful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 05:26 PM
17

Someone said they grow beards to attract other men and it made sense to me😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 04:06 PM
2

I think that part is just bad grammar. It should say woman's ass or women's asses. He could be trying to brag that he has a girlfriend and has sex. Bad grammar aside, I stand by my original comment. Super immature and stupid. If you don't like it, get rid of him. Block his posts. You don't have to repeatedly see things you don't like.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 03:29 PM
5

This right here. Never ever feed the trolls.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 03:23 PM
12

Exactly. No decent human being would defend pedophilia. Most people want them off this planet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 03:23 PM
7

Too many red flags. It's okay to trust your instincts. In fact, it's very important. Too many times we ignore red and yellow flags because we think we're being too picky or jealous. You don't have to give men chances or the benefit of the doubt when something they do sends off alarm bells in your heart and mind. That's your body warning you that something is off. Listen to and trust yourself. It may hurt at first, but it will save you precious time and save you from more (and harder) heartache d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 01:48 PM
5

Exactly what I almost added to my post. Just get me a ring gift. Don't call it a damn promise ring. I actually find the concept of a promise ring really immature and condescending. The man who tried giving me a promise ring actually said "I promise to marry you" like he was the fucking prize lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 01:41 PM
3

I feel like promise rings are for high schoolers. It's not cute when you're nearing adulthood. Plus the whole "I promise to marry you" seems to make the woman seem desperate. I think "will you do the honor of marrying me?" is much more fitting and sincere. I got one from a live in boyfriend when we were in our mid 20s. The "promise" was shy and awkward too, so I was super unimpressed and jumped up and told him what I thought about promise rings at our age. I'd already had a real proposal with a …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 01:37 PM
1

I don't even get what this means. It's extremely stupid and childish.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 01:28 PM
8

If I'm interested in a future relationship with the guy, I expect him to pay for dates. If he doesn't wordlessly pay the bill, I won't see him again. If he asks me to tip, I won't see him again. Only when I'm in a committed relationship will I occasionally pay for things. If a guy asks you out on a date (and it should be the man pursuing and setting up dates), he should be paying for it. However, if I can tell I'm completely uninterested in pursuing a relationship with the guy, I will offer to p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 01:18 PM
9

That was definitely a relationship changing statement. If he can say something like that, it can only get worse. Get rid of him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 01:08 PM
23

If they fear looking like Santa, then why are so many of them actively trying to look like Santa? I live in a city of overweight, unkempt beardos. I can't tell any of them apart. Even if they are skinny and wear painted on jeans, their beards are twice the size of their face. I used to have a guy "friend" I would occasionally sleep with. God his beard was exactly like Santa's and he had a dad bod. I still giggle so hard about the time he was the big spoon and his beard was bothering me, so I rea…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 12:59 PM
11

One time I got Dang, let's bang😂 I have so many amazing screenshots from my OLD days.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 12:47 PM
53

How are the majority of them so mentally and socially impaired? I went out on a non date yesterday with a guy who seemed relatively normal. We have mutual friends. On my way home I get a text that started with "oh no, I forgot to get my hug" and about midway told me he "enjoyed the eye candy". I had on mid thigh jean shorts and a plain t shirt. He's early 40s. They're all hopeless I guess🤷🏻‍♀️I don't even know if I'm capable of being sexually attracted to a man anymore. It no longer seems worth …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 12:45 PM
5

I feel the same and I earned this feeling. I think I may be too mentally and physically disgusted to ever date a man seriously again. I'm likely safe though because most men don't pursue women anymore. If they show any interest, they won't act on it. They sit back and wait for the woman to make the move. This is the biggest reason that I'm single more than I date.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 11:22 AM
14

I'm nearing 40 and I don't see how age would change the main FDS principles. I'm not lowering my standards just to avoid being single. I would RATHER be single than be in a relationship with another shit man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 11:09 AM
27

I had a young guy chasing me for years. I dated his brother (21) when I was 19, and he was 11. His brother is still a useless pos, but the brother was much better. We stayed in touch and he was always pretty cool. But one day he started messaging me about wanting to move here and date me. I was letting him down as nicely as I could. And then he messaged "when are you going to please me?" and I just insta-blocked. I probably would've done the same thing if it was worded better to say something li…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 02:22 AM
18

Oh they try. Some leave long ass comments that nobody reads🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 02:11 AM
10

Yep. I gave up on OLD sites. Too depressing to think that's the dating pool. I'd rather remain alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 02:10 AM
1

You got some good advice here. Blocking him from your life and moving on is the best thing you can do. Eventually the feeling of wanting revenge will fade, if you let it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 10:52 PM
7

FDS is for leveling up, not obsessing over pretend revenge on your ex. Read the handbook.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 10:10 PM
29

Literally my favorite whine from my last ex was "if I didn't reach out first, I'd never hear from you". Ya damn right. He earned it too. You earn my respect and time. I don't know a single woman without horror stories about men, starting at a young age and going on almost indefinitely.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 06:01 PM
10

I dated a 41 yr old who easily looked 51, and not in a hot way. He treated me worse than any ex in the past. I learned the valuable lesson that ugly, overweight, disfigured men will not treat a younger, attractive woman any better than a fit, attractive man will.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 05:45 PM
51

Years ago, one of the few men I was ever in love with was very outgoing and dramatic. It was really interesting to be with someone like that. He had never been disrespectful to me while we dated, but not too long after moving in together he was really pushing my buttons in a weird way. I finally snapped at him and instead of getting upset at me, he smiled and said "See? Didn't that feel good?" He literally thought my calm demeanor meant there was something wrong with me. He also started acting r…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 05:43 PM
11

I don't go over or under 5-5 1/2 years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 04:50 PM
94

That's been my experience. They aren't happy when a relationship is going well. They have to sabotage it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 04:37 PM
3

I feel that 100%. My abusive one fit me perfectly when it came to passion and sex. Too bad he also had a personality disorder lol. I won't settle for anything less than the passion I want. I was actually looking at my ex husband's downgrade today and thinking how different that must be for him😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 11:00 AM
24

The oldest male excuse is "I didn't download/watch that. My friend did". He's a liar. Just walk away.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 07:39 PM
39

You don't need proof or to further engage him. Just block and walk away. There's no reason to try to prove shit to him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 07:38 PM
1

He finally lost it at the end. It made zero sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 04:42 PM
9

Such a good show.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 04:35 PM
67

I have a relatively high libido and have dumped two long term relationships because they were withholding sex as punishment. One wouldn't talk about except to gaslight. One was already abusive in other ways, so the sex was the only thing even keeping me around. If you're having sexual problems as a man, you have to talk about it. You can't ignore it and expect the relationship to go along just fine.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 04:18 PM
2

I already did. You can repost it with usernames blocked out. You can leave yours though
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 04:05 PM
1

We have to block out any usernames or sub names. We have to protect the sub.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 02:11 PM
6

😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 01:39 PM
16

When I was growing up in the 80s and 90s, a girl couldn't even yawn in front of a man without risking him saying "keep that up and I'll put something in there". To this day, I yawn with my teeth bared or covering my mouth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 12:55 PM
5

Ha probably. I had to google the lyrics. I found out The Roots have a whole ass song called Break you Off. Wonder if it's good.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 01:32 AM
8

It's a euphemism for sex. I've heard it in song lyrics.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 12:45 AM
7

I liked using that to set the tone as well, but guys sending me intros had monogamous or non monogamous on their profiles, so that let me know we weren't on the same page and it was an easy left swipe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 08:12 PM
39

Same experience. First guy to message me told me he was looking for hookups. Smdh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 08:10 PM
29

I had the same poor experience with Hinge. I had a message within minutes and his second message was "so, what are you looking for?" The trick is to ask them the same question without answering. I did that and he admitted he was looking for hook ups. Unmatched and blocked. After him it was just shit profile after shit profile. Hinge makes it so easy, yet these men are garbage at even choosing a simple question and giving a simple answer. I couldn't believe how much worse it was than OKCupid and …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 08:08 PM
17

She's amazing ❤️ She's seeing the depravity of men early. I hope it makes her ruthless with her boundaries.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 08:03 PM
1

Stay mad
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 08:01 PM
2

That hair🤢 That spelling and grammar 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 04:12 PM
9

I found the rapist piece of 💩. According to him, you have to physically use the word NO or they aren't accountable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 04:09 PM
53

I can't even give men credit for my orgasms. I do all the mental and physical labor to make it happen and it will only happen if I actually care about the dude. Hmmm
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 04:06 PM
68

Rapist logic
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 04:04 PM
5

Thank you because my asian food game is not strong😆 Have you heard of milk and water kefir? I don't love milk, so I ordered the water kind. It's so interesting. It's not vinegary like kombucha. You can also get all the sugar out if you want. You can even find it bottled in stores, but stay away from Kelvita. The ingredient list is insane.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 03:52 PM
1

FDS isn't for posting what you did. There are plenty of other places to post cringy screenshots where you battle back and forth with a LVM. FDS is not the place. It's a shame you couldn't just realize that and take your deserved lumps. Plenty of women here take advice they don't want to hear in stride. Plenty of women here take the advice and level up. Instead, you act wholly offended at the good advice the members gave you. No one here attacked you. No one was nasty to you. You needed the wake …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 03:33 PM
6

I'm impressed 😉 I'm getting into fermenting now and it is so cool. I was thinking of getting into making bread and keeping up a sourdough starter. I just don't eat that much damn bread though 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 03:24 PM
5

It's some new trend of dancing to abusive texts, I mean voicemails. I don't find it "cool" at all, but I'm damn near 40.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 01:47 PM
6

There is nothing worse than being pregnant by and having children with a selfish man. I've been there and it's the reason I only had one kid and am divorced. I can't even say that my kid's father has been some kind of amazing figure in his life. He's mostly present and tries to do right by him, but overall he is still very self centered. I did all of the child rearing from birth til about kindergarten. Then my ex met a woman and now they parent together. My child loves them both, but often says …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 01:45 PM
22

OLD was too depressing for me. Bad or gross photos, bad or gross profiles, and bad or gross messages. If you finally message with one that seems normal and decent, you either very quickly learn that they aren't or you learn 2-3 months down the road when you're invested and it hurts when you inevitably have to dump them. When I first started, it was extremely fun to screenshot the worst ones and send to friends and it was fun to fuck with some of the ones that messaged me. But it very quickly got…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 01:33 PM
5

hahaha same
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 01:28 PM
2

Of course the post is now gone, but when I had a married acquaintance messaging me inappropriate things, I screenshot it and sent it to our most gossipy mutual friend. He's a big part of the friend group, so I just deflected until he got bored. I didn't feel comfortable alienating myself from the group by causing a scene or messaging his wife. But I had to show somebody that knew him and his wife.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 01:26 PM
30

This is such a great comment. I don't even understand why you were questioned and needed to clarify, but your second comment was also great. I'm just adding here and not trying to improve on what you said. Unless he's had a bad experience or you bring it up judgmentally, he usually will bring porn up himself. Many men see porn use as normal and nothing to be ashamed of. Even though they can likely see the negative effects, porn addicts will aggressively defend it. Gone are the days when I would …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 01:19 PM
15

It's so depressing that this is the state of men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:50 PM
3

Honestly it does feel good to date knowing that there is no end game. I don't even introduce them to my kid. I'm not saying I don't want commitment with someone long term, but I don't have that feeling of "running out of time" like some people get. You don't feel like you wasted your time when the guy ends up being a dud.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:44 PM
18

It really sounds like you're just settling for your boyfriend. It doesn't sound like he brings any value to your life other than being a friend. And you're not satisfied with that because you are here agonizing over whether to end it. I'm late 30s, divorced with one kid. I've been single for two years and recently started feeling like I wouldn't mind being single forever. I already knew that I don't want to get married again, have more kids, or live with another man, so my feelings make sense. L…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:26 PM
3

This is a great point and also where I'm at.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:10 PM
48

We don't engage further. We just block and move on with our lives. His texts were cringeworthy. Accidental emoji my ass. I've got rid of many a dude on OLD by literally matching their energy and letting them disappear on their own.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 03:03 AM
16

We don't help them be pieces of 💩. We like the early warning signs so we can flee.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 02:58 AM
5

I don't even leave home or work without a huge bottle of water. When I drive literally half a day to see family, I bring a cooler filled with water and soda and a bag of snacks. It's not rocket science 😂 I'v also slept in my car when I found it necessary. It's not a big deal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 01:35 AM
16

I find that women have 10x more personality than men. Most men I meet are completely basic, boring, and lazy. I don't really even know any women that have all three and they often don't have any of those traits.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:48 AM
2

There is no way they'll be satisfied. They get off on playing with women's emotions and robots will never have emotions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:38 AM
2

😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:36 AM
3

Teeth. Such a good movie😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:34 AM
7

I've driven across countries ALONE and survived just fine. Victim mentality assholes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:29 AM
3

Male: he's wrong for suggesting it, but it is society's fault. Two comments from this dude shifting blame on "society". If society was the problem, women would be dangerous too. Women are out here just trying to live our lives. We physically have to avoid being attacked, raped, and murdered BY MEN. Every. Day. Let that sink in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:26 AM
1

This comment keeps showing up so I can't allow it, but YES that is what he's saying😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:23 AM
7

Best unwanted male comment yet. I will break it down. "It's mostly men, but it's not their fault. They have rage that builds up that they don't get a chance to "clear". Men simply can't help it. 🤷🏻‍♂️They need another person (a woman most likely) to share, I mean, DUMP their problems on. It's the other person's (woman's) duty to help solve these rage problems." I can't fucking even😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:22 AM
5

Such an intelligent counter argument /s🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:18 AM
5

I've been married. I've lived with boyfriends. I will never do either again. But I'm late 30s and own my own home. I have a child.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 10:56 PM
2

That's really sad. You need therapy to find the inner strength to leave and also not get yourself into another situation like this. Reddit has some good subs for helping people see the light. I know bpdlovedones was fantastic. Lots of people in different stages of wanting to leave and having left. Narcissistic abuse is also probably really good. Best of luck. You are supposed to be living your life to the fullest. Not settling for love crumbs and abuse. It's 100% better to be alone than to put u…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 09:36 PM
49

This is so pathetic, but I'm glad he put it there so women could swipe left/get rid. A lot of men are smart enough to keep their bad attitudes off online dating. If you're lucky, they show it in the initial messages. I don't use OLD anymore. I'm not sifting through 99.99% shit men in hopes of finding a unicorn anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 09:27 PM
10

Nobody gives a shit about your opinion.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 08:50 PM
8

Bullet mf dodged. A lot of them act like this. Like they are god's gift.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 08:46 PM
19

It took me about a year to fully get over my last traumatic relationship. I just got tired and dumped him flat. But not wanting to be with him didn't keep me from missing him. You get bonded and even trauma bonded, so it's hard for your mind to let go. It will get easier and easier.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 08:45 PM
35

I've lived in a fair number of US states and also traveled and lived overseas. It's the same everywhere I've been. Even if a man has shown initiative at first, he quickly stops. I don't personally care anymore. I've dealt with this behavior for about 20 years, so I don't concern myself with finding a man anymore. I technically have a date next weekend, but I was just messaging a guy acquaintance about something he posted on social media. We've been social media friends for a year but he literall…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 08:43 PM
96

The most I ever did for a guy like this was a simple "I'm gonna go ahead and move on. Good luck!" He started whining about being busy, so I told him I'm busy too. Then never heard from him again. I should've just blocked and moved on and left him wondering. We're being too nice. They know they're behavior is shit and they don't care.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 08:37 PM
122

Exactly. It doesn't work. Ask me how I know. I always tried this as a last ditch effort in serious, long term relationships. It never worked once and I had to leave to find my peace again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 08:35 PM
84

It doesn't have to be a date. Then, no reason it can't be a date. I love when the insanity is done over text.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 05:40 PM
230

Your intuition was SPOT ON. He's trash. He told you himself he expects a 50/50 split in a relationship. You aren't even in a relationship yet. He's supposed to be impressing you so that you see him as relationship material. HUGE fail from him, but thankfully he let his red flag fly early. I'm betting the 50/50 for him only works for money and that he expects the woman to do more physical and emotional work. He insists you drive an hour away to a specific and expensive restaurant and then expects…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 02:17 PM
11

Are you serious? What he said wrong is highlighted in yellow. If you believe in paying for dates and drinks (with strange men you meet online even) then you are in the wrong sub.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 01:44 PM
14

This can get you jailed in the states. I wish she would press charges.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 12:13 AM
1

Oh that's not how I read it, but that's cute😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 07:30 PM
16

Pheromones are real lol. I felt it once with a coworker. We never even considered dating but it was hard being around him lol. I wish that guy I dated had been just a narcissist. I'm able to break out of those relationships pretty fast even if post breakup is a bit painful. But borderlines with narcissism are harder for some reason. You want to believe they have empathy and real remorse and that keeps you hanging on way longer than you should.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 06:13 PM
13

You can't claim trauma bonding if the chemistry is there before the abuse starts. But trauma bonding is a thing I eventually had with that relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 06:10 PM
47

The best sexual chemistry I ever had was with a borderline pd who was also narcissistic. He wasn't even the least bit attractive. That's what killed me😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 04:51 PM
5

Weird. I didn't take any of what you implied from the original post. At all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 08:20 PM
4

Before my kid turned two, I told him I was done. He still gets on my nerves occasionally but at least I don't have to clean up after him or see his face everyday or god forbid sleep with his 60 second ass anymore. By the way, 60 seconds started AFTER the marriage. He just quit trying to impress me, even in bed. 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 03:25 AM
5

I was literally in line at the Dr's last week and the guy in front of me was asked about his next appt and he goes AHHH MY WIFE takes care of all that for me. She just tells me when and where and I go. He was like mid-late 20s. I rolled my eyes so hard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 03:00 AM
18

I know "hangry" was used as an excuse. He also sent a screen shot of his only friend calling him an asshole and saying he's lucky I even came over😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 05:56 PM
33

My worst one always did that. He even ruined his own birthdays. The first fight he ever started with me was the day before his birthday. He got progressively worse til I dumped him that night. He acted like a total ass at Halloween. When my bday came around, he accused me of just coming over for a free meal LOL. We'd been together exclusively for a year. When I told him I wasn't going to put up with his attitude, he literally told me where the door was and I promptly walked out of it. He then te…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 04:39 PM
56

Is she doing all this while also working full time and doing the same things for children? That's where I get stuck. I didn't mind doing more around the house and cooking, when I couldn't work, but I still expected him to get his own damn self up for work and remember his own appointments. He wasn't allowed to make extra messes for me to clean up. And ultimately he was so helpless with basic life things and being a parent that I yeeted his ass. I'm much happier divorced.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 04:30 PM
44

That's what I noticed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 04:27 PM
51

I wish, but my friend has had countless shitty boyfriends, even abusive ones, and she will still scream NOT ALL MEN even when nobody asked her to. It's embarrassing. She just won't learn. She's early 40s. She's still trying to get attention from that "diamond in the rough" that she hopes exists. But over and over again she just meets douchebags who mistreat her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 04:30 PM
14

I've dated and have been friends with dudes who do this. It never once embarrassed me or made me annoyed enough to bitch on reddit about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 12:57 AM
8

OMG I am 💀😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 12:43 AM
2

You're an approved user there now. Have at it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 11:49 PM
2

That's how fds was when you started. Your posts have to be manually approved until you become an approved member. We just can't advocate posts on fds where we give scrote messages a platform lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 10:44 PM
3

This goes in FDS super fans
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 10:13 PM
187

He thinks it's funny, but she just showed him that she's about ready to yeet his ass and be a single parent. It's definitely easier to do that than clean up after an extra child. She's being loud about it now in hopes that he'll change, but eventually she's going to get quiet and by then it will be too late.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 10:10 PM
74

I had a guy friend ask me if I was interested in a friend of his who lived like 2,000 miles away. LOL NO I am not interested. He also added that the guy was more on the overweight side. Again, NO. I'm healthy and really work at it, so I only date other people who are healthy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 10:07 PM
10

Psychologists call this dissociative amnesia, but I just call it an excuse. I refuse to date someone who claims they don't remember doing hateful or violent shit when they're angry. I spent too much time feeling sorry for and trying to understand an ex's personality disorder. Never again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 04:27 PM
25

I really like the "you can't take a joke" real meaning of "you can't take an insult" because that's exactly what it is. It's a red flag for me when a man's profile says something about needing a woman who can take or joke or can handle some light "roasting". There's another way they put it that I can't think of, but they all basically mean that he's an asshole who's going to make fun of everything about you that he can, to make him feel better about himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 04:20 PM
30

Any men that wants to choke you during such an intimate act, 100% does not love or care about you. I will always see sex as something intimate and special between two people and that's why I can't do one night stands, group sex, or poly type shit. I don't do casual sex with men I know either because none of them deserve that from me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 04:15 PM
65

They really are out here expecting women to initiate everything and chase THEM nowadays. It's bizarre and I won't be a part of it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 04:11 PM
2

There's a lot of people who will try and tell you it's not okay. Don't listen to them. They're just trying to feel better about their own dysfunctional relationships.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 02:28 PM
1

Lol no. That would be extra crazy. Unblocked him on Facebook. I had him blocked for many years. So it's possible he was checking facebook or it did one of those "people you may know" things and tipped him off. I don't even use my full name on there so it was most likely fb itself that tipped him off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 02:22 PM
10

I've frustrated many a man (and some women) by refusing to engage in fighting. So I get it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 09:25 PM
5

The hypocrisies are endless😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 07:11 PM
5

hahaha the comments on this sub literally give me life. So many hilarious stories and comments😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 05:55 PM
16

Girl he was WAY trashier than that😂 He went as far to say that I shouldn't take vitamins because he doesn't and is perfectly healthy. He was really trying to make me feel like shit over a vitamin. Whilst he had a mega bottle of benadryl to assist in sleeping, needed blood pressure pills, smoke and drank like an addict, was overweight, and also later tells me he suffers from regular tonsil infections and tailbone cysts. Like WHAT? I had ZERO medical issues, weight issues or recurring infections a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 05:13 PM
4

My friend's husband never looks like trash. He doesn't go all out, but he takes care of himself and how he dresses. My favorite part is that he loves wearing matching clothes with her for holiday events. Their marriage has issues, but for the most part it does look fun and healthy. I wish it wasn't so rare to see men taking pride in their appearance. I'm just not attracted to 90% of what's out there and I refuse to settle.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 03:30 PM
6

My last mistake wasn't trying to fix a man, but it was excusing his bad behavior because "mental issues" and stupidly hoping he'd want to get help for himself. Never again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 03:19 PM
1

Haha I had to look too😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 03:17 PM
9

Hahaha this is so true. I had dinner at my male friend's house and he had on fox news and wouldn't stfu about it. I won't be going back anytime soon. I date guys in their 30s and 40s and have already dated two porn sick 40+ dudes. One of them had a dick that didn't even work. The other one couldn't stay hard or even cum most of the time. I did have a fling with a mid 30s guy who wasn't porn sick and that was the first time I've seen a guy's dick that hard in YEARS. I forgot what they're supposed…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 03:14 PM
6

I feel feminine down in my soul. I feel it 24 hours a day and I love it. For me it has nothing to do with how I dress, but I do feel my most feminine all done up like the lady in the pic. I truly enjoy taking care of my hair, body, and health, but I don't spend excessive amounts of money trying to maintain it. But I am truly Wow'd by the women who do. I just can't be bothered lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 03:05 PM
35

My ex when I was applying face cream in my pajamas. GoD yOu'Re So HiGh MaInTeNaNcE!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 02:57 PM
15

I felt towards the end that my ex hated me. I never feared his old, nerdy, overweight, disfigured ass would break up with me, but I felt hated all the same. It was such a relief to sever that trauma bond.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 02:52 PM
4

All you have to do is not take care of your teeth and pull any tooth that bothers you. My ex was 40 and looked like a jack o lantern. I met him after he finally got a stable job and insurance and used credit to fix his teeth. However, I saw old pictures later🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 02:46 PM
11

There's a song I love who's chorus says this. I'm a man who's got very specific taste. You're just my type. You have a pulse and you are breathing. -Saint Motel I cackle every time I hear it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 02:41 PM
4

Men love spending their money on women and sex. The pick me's and lib fems are ruining what used to be a good thing😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 02:12 PM
5

This is now how I live my life and why I'm at least happy that my last ex brought me with him on his vacation through Europe. He sucked but that trip was phenomenal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 02:10 PM
6

😂😂😂 OMG 😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 02:05 PM
13

Take another look at his chin. Omg I can't stop laughing at it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 02:02 PM
4

THE DELUSION😂😂🤡 I'm cackling 😂 His chin is fucking SENDING me😆 Men get worse with every decade!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 02:00 PM
2

My state allows concealed carry guns with a permit but not tasers🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 01:45 PM
1

Hahahaha I already knew it existed and knew of at least one guy who was into it, but I didn't know the term. CBT typically stands for cognitive behavioral therapy, which they apparently need. Yeah if the average male was just expected to do any number of these fucked up male fetishes, they'd be screaming for porn to be banned.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 01:31 PM
11

If you feel like this, you aren't ready. You need to heal. You need to get mentally stronger. It's definitely not healthy to want abuse. The drug like highs and lows (mostly lows) aren't good for your health, physically or mentally. I didn't have to go as far as getting a therapist. I used the internet to learn all about the narcissistic abuse cycle and I used a BPD forum to get help from strangers and later give that same help. Many people with BPD also suffer from NPD. Out of the fog is a good…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 03:39 AM
4

Exactly!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 01:36 AM
21

I like this tactic a lot. Just feign ignorance and keep saying you don't understand how that's funny.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 04:46 PM
75

Say "Oh you like choking? Because I always wanted to put on a sharp, high heel and stomp a man's dick while he screams." WHAT?! I was JuSt JoKiNg!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 04:45 PM
70

Tale as old as time. Say something inappropriate. Get called out. Claim it was just a joke and then act like the woman is CrAzY for not having a sense of humor.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 04:43 PM
37

I'm short, so anything over 6' is weirdly tall to me. I don't find it attractive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 04:41 PM
30

It makes me laugh when that happens because it makes zero sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 03:43 PM
4

Good lord. I had a male lawyer who told me to cover up my chest because it could make me look bad. Someone had ran a stop sign and I was trying to fight getting blamed for it lol. Also I have a huge (natural) chest on a tiny body so just about any dress shirt put them on display. God I was pissed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 03:42 PM
25

No 5 killed me. He literally goes on and on about how independent he is and how "he don't need no woman" and then #5 😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:11 PM
16

Wooooooooow Imagine being so ignorant that you think this is acceptable. I mean, is this a misogynistic rant or a classifieds ad?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:06 PM
12

They get really aggressive and often mean or violent if you ignore it. It has happened to me a lot.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:04 PM
189

Every time I lower my standards to give one a chance, I regret it. I won't be doing that again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:03 PM
23

I did too😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:00 PM
36

He thinks those big arms make him a catch. Not even close.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 01:54 PM
28

Asking for pictures is an instant block from me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 12:56 PM
63

My ex told me gaslighting wasn't a real thing and that I made it up😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 12:55 PM
48

Their apologies are always "I'm sorry I did that, BUT.... or "I apologize if YOU took it the wrong way". I'll never allow apologies like that in my life again. As soon as I hear any of that, I'm walking permanently.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 12:54 PM
18

Yeah. I didn't find it passive aggressive. I found it to be desperate lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 10:43 AM
2

I am a smiley mf but I become Queen Bitch If some "man" tells me I should. I was probably like you in the past, but almost 30 years of that shit and I am DONE lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:36 AM
6

This is my nightmare 😂 How many times have we all been told to "smile" by strange men? I hate them lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:31 AM
5

I automatically get mad as hell and say something nasty to them. I never regret it😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:31 AM
6

😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:30 AM
7

Amen
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:26 AM
19

Yep. We don't have time for the bullshit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:26 AM
51

One of my last attempts at dating did this shit. He was very attentive for several weeks but then it slowed down and I got wary. Texted me around 7pm. I replied with a question. Then I got one of his good morning texts. No answer to my question. I didn't even reply. I waited til that afternoon to tell him we weren't a good match and good luck to him. He knew exactly why and said der er I was busy. I said "I'm busy too". And never heard from his ass again. Good riddance 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:25 AM
15

I've worked with two women at my current job who had extremely abusive ex's. They had to get their parents involved to help pull them out of it. I've worked with many other women with abuse stories. My last ex was very mentally and emotionally abusive. It was covert. I think he wasn't very physically abusive because I myself am intimidating and he knew better. It's an epidemic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:18 AM
3

Girl. That's what I came here to post lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:14 AM
17

My ex friend realized her high school sweetheart husband was an absolute shit husband after he became a father. What did she do? Got. Pregnant. Again. presumably to save the marriage. Well, now they are divorced and hate each other. As soon as you find out you're dealing with a shitty partner, just LEAVE. No reason to bring ANY children into it. Just lick your wounds and learn from the experience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:13 AM
2

Ew🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:08 AM
4

God they are PATHETIC
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:06 AM
11

I always immediately feel sorry for them and see that red flag for what it is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:05 AM
18

Next time, don't just lay there so he can "get it over with", just stand up and walk the fuck out. And never look back. It's time to stop "taking one for the team" and time to walk tf out. It's not always safe to speak your mind in the moment, but you can leave.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:04 AM
14

I'm wondering the same thing. A high value woman does not meet a married or partnered up ex EVER. A HVW blocks that piece of shit for life. It doesn't always pay to let the new woman know he's still reaching out, so the least you can do is drop all contact with that loser.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:03 AM
14

My sentiments exactly. I would've nexted his ass with a quickness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 01:58 AM
27

And all the physical and emotional support!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 01:57 AM
58

These dudes want to put in ZERO effort, yet expect women to actually want to sleep with them. We have to do better than this. No effort from them? No ANYTHING from us. If we all started being this way, men would change.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 01:56 AM
76

So disrespectful. I wouldn't put up with it. I'd throw the whole man away.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 01:51 AM
82

😂 god they get on my nerves
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 01:45 AM
2

LMAO
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 11:53 PM
6

I was just now waiting in line to check in for an appt and the guy in front of me (mid to late 20s) says "oh my wife takes care of all my appointments. She just tells me when and where and I show up". Y'all I rolled my eyes to the back of my head. He's your husband, not your child. Unreal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 11:50 PM
4

NAMALT! Nobody's perfect! Hahaha this is exactly why men aren't allowed here. Huh. Triggered him enough for two more comments and an award😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 11:34 PM
21

My great grandma got divorced from my grandad's father. No idea when but it was before the 50s. I couldn't believe it when I found out. She remarried a wonderful man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 11:23 PM
78

When he gets tired of maintaining the effort and reveals himself a LVM or NVM faker, let him go. Don't sit wondering what happened to make him stop. He was always going to stop because it was fake.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 08:25 PM
16

My ex mil did my ex husband a grievance when she ingrained in him that you don't have to clean if you worked. I know because anytime I tried to do her dishes she'd tell me I didn't have to because I worked. My Dad also told my sister that she had to pick up the chores slack on days I worked. I refused and just did the chores after work, before bed. I felt bad. My ex mil also told me once that she felt bad for something my ex did, but then followed it up with, "but you can see why he did it thoug…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 05:08 PM
20

I've never seen a woman need to leave a man as badly as this woman needs to do it. Insulin will not only keep her alive, but it's also expensive. You can't solve Type I diabetes with home remedies and exercise. It's with you for life. Reading this is terrifying. I hope she got so much advice about leaving before he succeeds in either ruining her health or killing her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 04:23 PM
88

Lmao changing his age to older so the older women don't screen him out. Passionate here means looking for an older woman just for sex. Pathetic. I don't date any older or younger than 5-6 years. It's too weird.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 01:57 PM
2

Cheers
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 02:03 AM
5

I've always expected men to pay for everything because that is what men have always done in my life. From childhood to now, I've always seen men taking great pride in paying for everything. This new 50/50 shit is foreign to me. My last friends group had a single man in his 50s and he insisted on paying for our tickets, food, and drinks. He said it made him feel good. The last guy I dated literally told me that he was old fashioned and felt men should take care of women. I'm not suddenly going to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 01:55 AM
11

I ended an engagement once, gave the ring back. I was having some trouble trying to live close to him and instead of helping me find a new roommate, he asked me to marry him. When I realized he was going to just listen to me freak out about finding a new roommate and only offer "good luck" as help, I moved back home and dumped his ass. He kept reaching out every year or so to brag about his life. His new fiance and the bigger ring he bought her was one of them. She ended up contacting me freaked…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/20 04:46 PM
2

Weird flex 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/20 08:37 PM
45

As soon as your relationship makes you feel even a little bit confused, it's time to end it and not look back. Stop second guessing yourself and giving unworthy men the benefit of the doubt. It's never worth it. You'll find yourself doing it over and over again until you're ready to move on out of sheer mental exhaustion.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/20 02:31 PM
2

I moved lots of times. It was always a great adventure. I now live a good 13 hr drive from where I grew up. Before that, I lived about a 7 hr drive but lived close enough to walk to an ocean bay. The ocean was just a boat ride over. I even lived in Europe for several years. God I love picking up and starting over, but when I had a kid I decided to stay in one spot and keep him in the same school. Luckily I adore the area and gladly call it my permanent home.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 02:59 PM
3

I used to want another kid and my child has always wanted a sibling. But you nailed it, you can do so much more for one kid. I look forward to when he gets old enough to enjoy traveling with me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 02:56 PM
3

They tell us exactly who they are. We just have to pay attention and take what they say at face value. Our mistake is often giving them the benefit of the doubt. We have to stop doing that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 02:54 PM
6

I'm honestly so grossed out by men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 08:31 PM
3

Yeah, I'm no longer putting up with shit like that. I'd be filing for divorce. What is so difficult about picking up something your wife wants and needs? Early in my marriage, now divorced, I put my bare feet up on my husband's dash. He decided to tell me he kicked a girl out of his car for doing that. Thought he was being funny and also "nice" for allowing me to do it. I quickly told him to GROW TF UP.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 08:30 PM
11

He's really selling himself😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 08:22 PM
5

Men shouldn't be demanding or allowing women to do anything. They don't have the power to control us like that. I'm happy to hear he's in your past and that you have leveled up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 08:17 PM
6

That's good advice!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 01:33 PM
13

This right here! Every time I fall for the sweet act, I am inevitably let down. It doesn't mean you haven't found a decent one, but the odds are stacked against you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 02:27 AM
76

Girl. I feel this. I only lost my cool once on a guy after being endlessly harassed by him and do you know this mf looked at me and asked me what MY problem was? Lol and then he ended up doing the thing I asked him NOT to do anyway. He apologized and admitted it was abusive once and then turned around the next day and said WHAT? That time I "abused" you? Dur dur". I have had nothing but fake ass pos men since I started dating and I will be hard pressed to ever do it again. I've almost always had…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 02:23 AM
30

I think you nailed it. I even just looked Katherine up and she doesn't have an unusual or excessive laugh at all. So there you have it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 02:09 AM
136

My abusive ex made it his personal mission to make fun of my laugh. Not a single other person in my 30+ years had ever even mentioned my laugh like it was unusual, so I did see it for the attempt at abuse that it was. I guess he couldn't find anything else that worked, so kept digging in about my laughing because it's something I do constantly. I cringe now thinking about it and am glad I sent him the clip of some comedian saying it's especially shitty to make fun of someone for expressing happi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 01:46 AM
77

Honestly sounds like a man wrote this😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 01:43 AM
5

That's groovy as hell. I can ignore the words😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 01:41 AM
30

I got rid of mine like that. To this day I'm sure he thinks I left because I'm controlling and didn't love him for who he was. HAHAHAHA OK. What he thinks no longer matters in my now peaceful life. Good luck getting out of that relationship. You and the child deserve better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 10:20 PM
17

He just completely misread the thing on purpose and tried to argue that people should buy their own shit. Like a laptop is too expensive to just be giving away to the woman you love. So basically the kind of dude that would suggest a coffee date and expect you to purchase your own coffee. The kind of dude who gets you a sterling silver faux jewel ring, on clearance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 09:51 PM
21

JFC She mentioned she was going to get one, and since he's obviously more generous and financially stable than you, he decided to gift her the money for the computer. Some of these NVM comments, I swear.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 08:42 PM
17

Calling us ugly whales is their favorite.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 08:23 PM
14

She's here and looking for more advice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 08:17 PM
3

I always loved this one❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 08:15 PM
15

It's a great list but I basically found that to be all of them. I mean sometimes they were just too unattractive, but even the ones I agreed to go out with were ultimately trash. So I quit. I don't see myself ever trying OLD again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 08:15 PM
5

As soon as a man even mentions anal, I'm out. They never stop bringing it up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 08:12 PM
5

Because he respected his girl....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 08:10 PM
3

Your house is about to look amazing again AND you'll be saving a ton of money. 👍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 08:09 PM
2

Preach, girl. I dealt with the selfishness through pregnancy and beyond. We were married and he was pestering me to get pregnant. He put our child in mortal danger several times and then pouted when I freaked out. Like the time I walked into the garage and there was a plugged in HAND SAW laying on the floor. When I freaked, he stomped over and simply unplugged it. Umm our toddler knew how to work plugs and there was no child safety button on this machine. When one of our foster dogs turned out t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 07:59 PM
17

The movie snacks are more expensive than the tickets. I never once though that was a good deal lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 07:32 PM
14

Definitely don't hold back for a one month relationship with a man who just wants to take it slow. You'll find yourself single and stuck or at least behind on where you planned to be in your life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 05:28 PM
5

I literally just a read a comment from a man basically bragging that he broke up with his gf of FIVE YEARS (aka forever gf) because she wanted to switch from hormonal birth control to condoms. I think more likely she dumped him for being an asshole about it, but still.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 05:21 PM
8

I feel this down in my soul😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 05:18 PM
2

Haha men like that guy wouldn't know how to make a women orgasm if he was given a map or a how to video. It's not ignorance. It's that they are selfish and don't give af.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 05:12 PM
3

I find that older men get too set in their ways. A lot of my friend's dads or older men I've known through work are so obsessed with their political views that you can't talk to them about anything else and they will never hear your side. I gave up on my dad after several years of trying. He died having never met my then 7 yr old and I didn't shed a tear. I tried. My life was infinitely better without his hate and negativity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 05:10 PM
3

Any boyfriend acting like that and saying things to hurt you should be thrown out of your life. Take the trash out, sis.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 05:07 PM
2

She was responding to the username which has Princess in it🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 04:59 PM
3

You're in the wrong sub😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 04:55 PM
12

Hahaha such an accurate response 😂 I'm not gonna lie. I'm disappointed by skinny or too short dicks. I need that perfect medium.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 04:53 PM
3

Good advice for men here. Try different condom brands, even ones online, until you find something that's comfortable for you. Preventing STD's is just as important as preventing a pregnancy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 04:48 PM
3

This one broke up with his gf of five years because she wanted to go off bc and use condoms. You can't make this shit up. Stay woke ladies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 04:44 PM
7

It's funny how triggered males get when you suggest they should care about women's health and use condoms or get vasectomies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 04:41 PM
3

Found the porn sick, limp dick
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 04:39 PM
3

You can have damn near 100% with condoms that fit, pulling out, and the rhythm method. Using all three together. My age changed my cycle from every 28 days to every 21 days plus I occasionally pass two eggs (fraternal twins run high in my family), so someone like me would have fewer safe days lol. But that's still better to me than using hormonal or invasive bc. At my age, I'd insist my partner get snipped too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 04:30 PM
4

The only bc that ever worked for me was the mini pill. I had horrendous cramps that prevented me from leaving the house for a couple days. The mini pill stopped it all. And then I had a kid and got older and the cramps stopped, but suddenly the mini pill was causing me to bleed for days anytime I had sex. So I went off bc and it was the best I ever felt. It was the most regulated and short my period has ever been. Then I had a pregnancy scare and went on nexplanon and it was the same shit. Bleed…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 04:24 PM
44

Someone recently said that mgtow actually means men getting triggered over women and now that's all I can see😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 12:17 AM
14

That's exactly why I thought this particular article fit here so well. It was so sad to read.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 10:25 PM
24

Because patriarchy and religion apparently 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 07:11 PM
29

I don't know. I haven't done the math. I just know I fear men of all races. I especially fear the ones committing mass murder in public. We have to keep one eye over our shoulder at all times. Some women have to regularly fear their own family members in some cultures.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 06:58 PM
41

The way the article was worded just triggered me. She really thought there was a good man underneath the abuse and look where it got her😔 If you get too involved with a man like this, hell even just a little involved, you STILL run the risk of dying by his hands. Even a man who takes interest in you and you have no idea, is a risk. Women have to be so incredibly careful all of the time. It's heartbreaking and my heart breaks for her and her family.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 06:56 PM
43

She even forgave him for choking her. Uggh. Yeah I've been there. Took 3-4 weeks for his PD to show up, but I was stupid enough to think there was good in him under the personality disorder. I never felt safe with him and really we shouldn't entertain men who don't make us feel safe at all times.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 06:48 PM
6

I wonder what she gets when he inevitably gains it all back?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 05:48 PM
7

I even have to worry about this and I have a male child. I have had the conversation with him numerous times. You can't touch people inappropriately and you can't let them touch you inappropriately. Watch out for strangers, especially older boys and men. It's a horrible conversation but so necessary. He's such a lovely child and not like a typical male child at all. He's not destructive, doesn't like doing dangerous things, loves all animas, has empathy.... His dad wasn't depraved or porn sick, …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 05:35 PM
3

Some things will always sting. Just learn to be thankful you dodged that bullet. I'll never understand their lack of empathy or lack of caring about anything but themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 05:31 PM
4

You never have to go through that again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 05:29 PM
3

When it does happen, never stop trusting your gut. It's okay to realize you made a mistake. It's okay to live life just for yourself or even live a life of helping other women and children and leaving men out of it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 05:29 PM
7

Their hypocrisy and stupidity never fails to amaze me😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 05:27 PM
15

Not true about great grandpa. One of my worst experiences as a live in caregiver was an 80+ yr old, extremely frail man in a walker, stopping by my room to hold his hands out in front of him and actually say to me "you know what I want to do with these?" I stormed out and went straight to my office to see what my boss and supervisor wanted to do. They said it was within my right to blow the whistle on him, but I felt too bad for his old wife who had been so good to me. It scared the shit out of …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 03:45 PM
10

I'm so sorry. I consider myself extremely lucky not to have been molested or worse by my BPD Mom's menagerie of trash boyfriends. I kicked her out of my life as soon as I started high school. She's 60 now and still entertaining trash men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 03:34 PM
4

Definitely make that bucket list. I made mine in my late 20s. I enjoyed the vacation so much that I went back the following year. And the next year I checked off another bucket list destination. I'm currently getting my life in order again after divorce (it took YEARS), and I'm looking forward to checking off more things I'd like to do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 03:22 PM
3

I worked and supported myself since I was 17. It was very hard. I couldn't afford to work full time to pay my rent and car and other bills and ALSO go to school full time. I had to turn down an internship at my dream job. It was devastating, but I just couldn't make it work. So I decided to move to my dream area and figure it out. I worked sometimes three jobs, but I lived at the beach. I got a girl squad from one of the jobs. Eventually (around 26 or so), I paid off my car and got myself back i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 03:15 PM
10

That was inspiring!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 02:59 PM
11

Even the halfway decent ones aren't capable of making good partners. I've had quite a few of those. Good looking, funny, intelligent, doing financially well in life, not directly mean or abusive....but they don't make good partners because they are so incredibly thoughtless and selfish when it comes to women. I'm afraid to even give one a chance anymore. Dating an ugly, life long nerd backfired on me worse than the above types. I'm at least glad I no longer feel the need to be with a man. It put…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 02:47 PM
5

Line up ladies! Poor attempts at gross humor are an automatic NO from me. Unreal. I see I'm not missing anything by being off the apps.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 02:34 PM
14

Try putting just ONE personal preference on your dating profile and watch the NVM and LVM message you to tell you how shallow you are for having it. It happened to me so much that I stopped. My preferences were no smoking and no full, unkempt beards. The smokers and beardos couldn't take it even though there was zero chance I'd find them attractive anyway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 02:29 PM
18

This is the biggest reason I gave up and usually last less than a week on those apps. My friends and I have a private group for roasting, and scrolling through those pics and intros are a nightmare. It makes zero sense. It's like they are BLIND to how bad the pics are and like they get off on advertising all of the red flags.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 02:25 PM
22

That's exactly it. It's such a bitter pill to swallow. That there isn't really a good man in there. The good man is the mask, the facade. Completely fabricated. Even I had a hard time with that realization.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 02:16 PM
3

I think this is why it's so ingrained for me to let men down easily. I've had enough come unhinged that I want to spare myself witnessing it. Some go unhinged no matter what, so you have to be careful regardless. I tell this story a lot lol, but I had a guy seemingly try to let ME down easily and I was so happy and relieved because I didn't like him either. Except he got really upset that I wasn't upset and I kept trying to come back to "well YOU were the one telling ME you didn't think we were …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 01:36 PM
24

There are many dudes out there putting up pics of their nieces and nephews. They really are brain dead.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 10:35 AM
181

He's really going around telling every cute girl he sees that she's cute and hoping for what? He's a predator
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 10:32 AM
155

We have to make them invest in and fall in love with us before we sleep with them. This is why we insist men pay for everything early in the relationship, and things should never be 50/50. If you treat a man too well, he'll start taking you for granted. It doesn't make sense, but it's the way most of them are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 10:29 AM
50

Yeah, because friends don't waste each other's time with "small talk". These are the dudes I can't swipe left on fast enough.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 04:01 AM
17

I edited to add more. I missed some of what you were saying so I went too easy on your negging bf. People here have recommended that when you get a neg or an unfunny joke from a man, it's good to straight face ask them "what do you mean by that?" It puts them on the spot. I only say that because I'm worried why the hell he felt the need to add that. Was he comparing you as lazy or less than? I don't know. Just reading that didn't set off red flags from me, HOWEVER, I wasn't there and you were. A…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 12:30 AM
141

Usually I tell people not to reply but good god this is absolute gold😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 01:43 AM
91

That screenshot gave me life😂😂😂 You were so spot on with everything. Seriously I can't stop giggling 😂 I gave up OLD because of the whole "looking for fun" bullshit. But honestly, my last bf was the WORST and he right off the bat wanted something serious and monogamous. We have to be careful NO MATTER WHAT. Also males using "lol" too much is a red flag. They use it as a cushion against getting called out on their bullshit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 01:40 AM
48

I feel that. My husband was a huge disappointment even though he wanted me to get pregnant. Once he realized it changed our dynamics a little bit, he went into a self pity party and withdrew. I ended it when our kid was a toddler. I was tired and he saw no reason to change. I only have one kid because he ruined the idea I had for having a child with a loving partner and I never want to take a chance on it happening again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 09:01 PM
1

😂😂Thankfully I only gave those out if he kept getting me off without getting himself off. ED issues. And not because he asked. I find that a turn off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 07:01 PM
3

She had to learn the hard way repeatedly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 12:56 PM
6

In real life, I'm seeing a lot of desperate pick-me's or women that have given up and just stay with a loser. My closest friend has went her own way. Occasionally she'll meet a random guy and show some interest, only for him to screw it all up quickly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 11:57 AM
15

👏 👏 👏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 10:25 PM
6

😂😂😂Good point
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 09:50 PM
21

That part REALLY stuck out to me too. It was almost laughable
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 08:42 PM
34

Her snarky giggling about how ridiculous it is for a women to pay for a date SHE was invited on absolutely gave me life. I know when the bill comes I don't act awkward. I don't do shit because I expect the man to pay. If they open their mouth to ask to split the bill, that is when I make a big show of it with the waitstaff and gladly pay my half so I can get the hell out of there and away from him. That has rarely happened to me thankfully.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 08:27 PM
27

Like the time a dude could tell I wasn't buying his bs and offered to flip a coin to see who pays. He tried to say it was progressive. Nah just split the check. Then he tried to kiss me goodbye 😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 08:17 PM
2

I mean, even animals aren't safe from the depravity of men🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 08:16 PM
3

😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 08:15 PM
19

😂😂😂 A whole MOOD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 08:11 PM
16

It's truly mind boggling
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 08:11 PM
22

It'S bIoLoGy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 08:05 PM
49

Stay woke ladies. Yellow flags are potential red flags!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 08:00 PM
12

😂snort
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 07:59 PM
34

LOVE THIS!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 07:59 PM
48

Nah I'll just throw the whole man away. Funny how they say it's okay for the man, but that it's wrong if a woman does it too. Typical gaslighting hypocrisy. I'll have no part of it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 07:57 PM
53

It's not abuse OR control. It's called having boundaries and standards. If they don't like it, they can bounce. That's the entire point.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 07:54 PM
41

Yeah we don't think that. We get dozens or hundreds or messages PER DAY just for being women. You're just another time waster (wasting your own time too) and we are more than used to that. Nice try though 👏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 07:53 PM
9

Haha he messaged me too, but I never read messages without checking profiles, so whatever it was got deleted when I blocked him. Waste of energy bro🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 07:46 PM
12

I meant the men refuse. Better edit😂 Just laughed out loud at that last sentence. Thanks😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 07:24 PM
91

Uggh most men I know act like they are chomping at the bit to perform oral on women. In real life, they do it for under a minute. I'll never forget my one ex who found out how much I enjoyed fingering and then told me he wouldn't do it again because I might prefer it to his dick. It was so bizarre. He was really good in bed other than this bs so it made zero sense. They wonder why women are preferring to be single now yet men still refuse to address the issues with how bad they are in bed and ho…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 06:53 PM
14

Almost every woman has been sexually assaulted in one form or another. You're a NAMALT idiot. Men are even violent towards each other. These are facts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 06:49 PM
3

I mean. I guess a few dates at least would be okay with me. If there's good chemistry, then they should make a decision.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 05:26 PM
4

Exactly. I want them to meet me and stop being interested in other women. A girl can dream lol. Just kidding. I've had plenty of those men in the past. A lot of them do want monogamy, but it's becoming more rare nowadays.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 05:25 PM
12

I wAs JuSt KiDdIng. Geez Women are sensitive. I run at that first sentence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 04:39 PM
5

😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 04:37 PM
3

WoMeN aRe JuSt As BaD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 04:32 PM
4

We don't advocate for any porn here. It's degrading to women and causes major sexual (and mind) dysfunction in men. It's not normal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 04:23 PM
3

I'm so glad my eyes are now opened to that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 04:09 PM
12

I know I've avoided a lot of fetishizing because of my ethnicity and I realize that makes me lucky. But I'm petite and busty and have had my fair share of that type of fetish.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 04:08 PM
3

This one really fancied himself a catch. He lost "the one" because he wouldn't move cross country for her. It was obvious he wasn't over her either. She married someone she met in the next state and he's salty😂 He was good on paper and easy on the eyes, but definitely not a high value man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 04:07 PM
2

BPD loved ones was the first sub I fell in love with. I stayed for probably a year, just helping other people. It's a great community and now I understand how hard the mods must've worked to keep it that way lol. Some subs really do need to only allow a certain type of people or gender, just so it can stay beneficial to the people who really need it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 04:05 PM
11

Me either. It absolutely disgusts me. And I've never dated one that wanted that either, thankfully. I seem to have a knack for avoiding the fetish guys OR they hide it from me out of fear lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 03:53 PM
3

I used to be part of the bpd forum and yes their behaviors and even words were eerily similar. My ex's mom was disordered herself and delighted in yelling things like "OMG she's still with you?! She must be a saint or extremely loyal" every time we were around her. We'd laugh but it was very telling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 03:52 PM
3

Ha I just used the term flip flop before I saw this😂 Our friends didn't want to admit my ex was as bad as I claimed even though they'd have to be blind not to see it. Thankfully I think they are learning.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 03:39 PM
4

😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 03:37 PM
18

I had a bf tell me that cumming on a woman anywhere was degrading yet he was one of the most emotionally abusive men I ever dated. The sex was the only thing worth sticking around for, after years of shitty sex. Some of them really are disconnected from reality.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 03:36 PM
8

One of the last guys I dated from OLD told me his strong boundary when dating now was that she MUST want to get married and have children. I told him I wanted neither and expected him to ghost. He didn't. He changed from that to "well I may have missed the boat on having kids, but I still want to get married". I explained to him that I didn't need marriage to feel secure and good luck. He changed his tune again to "I never thought of that" and proceeded to still chat with me and take me out on d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 03:27 PM
13

I think this is a big reason I leaned more towards accentuating my natural beauty instead of capitalizing on it. I wanted to be desired at all times, not just when I was all done up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 03:19 PM
4

That's where I was going with that. My ex had horrible BPD and does the same thing, just switches partners. He'd admit he was crazy one minute and then say he didn't need therapy the next minute. I was the first woman to date him seriously in about seven years. I hope I'm his last. He deserves to be alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 03:16 PM
8

I know! I missed that one. I was in my mid teens.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 03:13 PM
10

That's how I took it. It can honestly be taken so many ways that it's borderline confusing lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 03:08 PM
18

It honestly kills me how they refuse to admit the simple fact that women are more important in the grand scheme of things. We carry the children and it takes us 9-10 months to do it. And we don't even need a man to make it happen.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 03:06 PM
20

I get the importance when you're young and trying to find the right man, but I'm older and don't date multiple men. It's hard enough to find ONE I'm interested in. I'll only date a man who shows a lot of interest in ME, so if I find out he's still "shopping around" while also dating me, I'm getting rid. I'll make his choice easier.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 03:03 PM
6

Exactly this! She's already proven she doesn't need a man to be successful. You don't even need a man to have children. I wish I hadn't. I have it relatively easy parenting WITH my ex, but it's still not ideal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 02:57 PM
5

I'll never understand why they cock block themselves but I'm so thankful when they proudly display their many red flags.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 02:55 PM
43

My ex loved to talk about how emotional and hormonal women are, so I purposely stayed as emotionless as possible just to confuse him. The funniest part is that he had borderline PD so he was the most emotionally triggered man I've ever dated in my life. Never again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 02:42 PM
28

Same. I've never had a bf try or even ask to choke me or be particularly rough. I have had a few ask sheepishly about anal to which my reply was NO. Just as many told me they found anal disgusting and were glad I didn't like it. I've also had quite a few men halfheartedly grab my hair or neck or gently slap my behind. It was obvious they weren't comfortable doing it and almost never repeated it. It's like they were confused that the porn they watch does it, yet they don't actually enjoy it thems…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 02:37 PM
5

They only want what they can't have.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 02:25 PM
4

It sounds like he was already abusive and would've been even worse in a relationship. I think these are what's called attachment issues. Men use this tactic a lot in or out of relationships. It's a push/pull and the personality disordered are especially prone to doing it. They don't seem to know what they want at all and it's super frustrating. They want to chase, then want to be chased, and it continues until the woman gives up or gives up hope.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 02:24 PM
3

I'm so glad I was right and that it was just an excuse to get you there. Thanks for the update. CONGRATS!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 12:29 PM
25

Half of em don't even have working dicks anymore. I wonder if that causes some kind of existential crisis.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 12:15 PM
10

That last line was poetry😉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 12:10 PM
15

Same here. I find dating a hassle, a regularly upsetting hassle. It's not worth my peace.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 12:04 PM
4

Male hypocrisy. Thanks for pointing that out
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 12:02 PM
5

If you're bad at sex and don't care about making me orgasm, you're NOT seeing me again. And LOTS of women feel this way. I'm nexting a guy for being a bad kisser or bad at foreplay so I can get rid BEFORE having sex. How's THAT for incentive?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 12:01 PM
6

It's a fake respect at best. There's no supposed guy code.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 11:38 AM
17

Just deleted another "we can't help it. It's biology" post from a male. It's hypocrisy to claim to be the stronger sex and then also claim to be too weak to evolve.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 11:26 AM
3

🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 11:23 AM
4

We CaNt HeLp It. ItS bIoLoGy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 11:22 AM
3

WoMeN dO iT tOo
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 11:21 AM
1

It's an epidemic down south. You hit the nail on the head with that last sentence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 11:11 AM
2

I love your response and completely agree. ❤️ I hope OP can get on board one day.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 11:09 AM
2

I would hope that he and I both felt the same way. That our CHILD comes first. Children should always come first. Their emotional and physical development is so important! I'm not trying to be harsh with you, but I don't think therapy would hurt at this point. You seem a little hung up on making sure a man's kid doesn't come before you and it's not healthy. It sucks that a shitty man possibly threw that in your face, but it's also possible that he was being a good parent and you took offense to …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 11:02 AM
1

hahaha I snorted😂SO IRONIC. My mom is bpd and my last ex from AWHILE back was too. Both are blocked😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 02:20 AM
32

Again, I love it! All of it❤️ I'm in the same boat. I had big travel plans for the big 4-0, but now neither the original plan or the back up seem doable. I've thought about trips a bit closer to home and more related to mountains or water. But it's months away and who knows what else 2020 could throw at us. Luckily I am an introvert who is happy just staying at home, so I'm not too bothered. There's always 2021 lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 01:47 AM
221

I love this!! One of my happiest moments was selling my "promise" ring (we were mid 20s, long term, AND living together) to a pawn shop in Europe (on a SOLO vacation) in exchange for one of their rings. I still wear it every day, over ten years later.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 01:27 AM
2

Triggered😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 12:33 AM
34

You really triggered the porn sick pedos with this post. Good job😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 11:58 PM
68

Ha came here to say I hope she left for good.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 11:45 PM
5

I in no way, shape, or form think a man being too afraid to talk to women is an excuse that can't be helped and should be pardoned. They definitely aren't mature either, so you got that right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 07:29 PM
19

They're gross and so single minded. It's embarrassing. Women can do better than settling for that shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 07:26 PM
29

I know! That's why at first I thought he just said it wrong😂 Once I had a guy message just "more like Cs" and it took me forever to figure out that he was negging me about breast size. First of all, I would never talk about my breast size on OLD nor would I have close up pictures so it was EXTRA bizarre. And what tf is wrong with C's?😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 06:59 PM
13

If they feel the need to blab to me about all their sexual exploits, then I'm out of that relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 05:59 PM
48

It's like you hope they just mistyped and then they text it again and solidify just how dumb and clueless they are. I had one text that he knows he's out of my league, but.... I had to reread it to make sure my eyes weren't deceiving me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 05:56 PM
68

I came here to say he thinks he's the prize. Such a turn off. I've had these texts sent to me and I just stop responding. Too bad if they're just trying to "be cute". That's lame and overused.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 05:53 PM
24

That would be a marriage ender for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 05:50 PM
3

I've always had full size beds. They're just right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 05:19 PM
3

I'm sorry yet another male disappointed you. I've been there dozens of times. The next step is to stop telling them what they're doing wrong and about the basic things they should already be doing. If you're not even getting the basic respect, don't waste your breath or any more of your time. Just block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 05:18 PM
1

Lol it got deleted. I've been a dark brunette my whole life and it hasn't affected how attractive I feel. I'm actually starting to get excited about the grays coming in. I just want to keep my eyebrows dark, maybe with something permanent. But I'm not there yet. I have years to go.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 05:15 PM
10

I've gained almost ten since 2020 went wonky. I feel you. I hate it because it looks worse then it did last time I weighed this much. Every time I decide to get back to my regular diet, something happens to make me want to pity eat (and drink) again. We'll get back on track. Glad you dodged that bullet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 05:13 PM
6

This is much better than my story where a guy helped me to bed only for me to wake up to him touching me later. Luckily the movement caused me to vomit on him and I was able to rest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 05:01 PM
8

These are the kind of men I run into day after day. You can tell they're interested but they're too scared to make any kind of move.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 04:54 PM
9

I work with a young, beautiful, and intelligent woman who makes at least twice my salary and you wouldn't believe the horror stories she has about men. They really are out here ruining their chances at having fulfilling relationships with women. They're just too damn self absorbed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 04:53 PM
5

My child is always going to come first before anyone else in my life. However, I am not going to make that blatantly obvious. Anyone who does that is not high value. It is possible to give both relationships the attention they deserve, but a child's NEEDS (physical or emotional) should always come first in a parent's life. I have kept my child separate from my relationships since divorcing. I have to do this as long as possible to vet the man properly. No man has passed the initial vetting stage…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 04:50 PM
13

I've found this to be so true in my latest experiences. I don't even want to try to get involved with a man at the moment, not since last fall anyway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 04:37 PM
1

I think it depends on the age of the kids. On the one hand you don't want the kids to hate you for kicking dad out of the house, but on the other hand, they're kids and adult shit is none of their business. The last line was definitely too far. She could just say Dad did something terrible to me and he has to go. Maybe she didn't really tell them. We'll never know. I've actually seen one of these in real life. I still have the picture. It said a man and his skank slept here. The whole neighborho…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 04:02 PM
3

It took me a lot of time. It really did. I was relieved to be rid of him, but it was hard. Buying a body pillow actually helped. I love that thing still. What really helped was writing out every instance he was abusive to me. I got it all out and then never needed to obsess over it again. It was super healing. It took me a good year and a half to stop thinking about him so much. They say the amount of time you are together is how long it will take to fully get over them. And we were together 1.5…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:53 PM
3

Looks like OK Cupid to me. Men can't direct message anymore because most of them are disgusting and it made women uncomfortable. Some will still try to sneak something gross into their intro to you though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:46 PM
2

My problem is that every OLD profile I see is like this. Red and yellow flags everywhere or if not there, immediately in the conversation. It's why I don't do OLD anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:45 PM
6

That's not even how polyamory works. It's how polygamy works lol. I dated a guy like that for a bit then gave him the boot. He has tried for years to contact me and sneak in that he's monogamous now. The woman after me changed him. Yeah, I'll pass, thanks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:43 PM
5

I'm so tired of white dudes with blue eyes claiming native ancestry. I guess it's possible, but not likely. I was told my entire life I had Native ancestry and with my looks it's not impossible. We also had a tribe in a neighboring county, so maybe. I had my DNA done and not a speck of native ancestry 😂All European.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:42 PM
15

Exactly me! Every single guy I've dated in my mid to late 30s was looking for marriage and kids. Nah that part of your life is over. You missed it. One of my guy friends was over 40, with three kids he was raising alone, and he was hoping to find another woman and reverse his vasectomy. WTF?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:38 PM
5

ME TOO! I was married and had a kid in my late 20s. I'm done with kids now at near 40.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:36 PM
3

Smart therapist. We can't give them room to figure it out and try faking it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:26 PM
5

Ha same experience. Every single time I saw his mom she would say OH I can't believe Tilly is still putting up with you. She must be a SAINT! Not just once but EVERY time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:25 PM
4

You've received some excellent advice here. The only way I would like this proposal is if it's just a trick to get you where he needs you to be to propose. I don't think a HVM would be that close to closing on a house if he wants to get married. Like so many said, you two should be house hunting together, it shouldn't just be him. I can't wait for the update!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:22 PM
4

Imagine getting married and being on the deed to a house you own together before realizing the man is a complete slob who expects the woman to work, cook, AND clean. I never want to live with another man after all of my terrible experiences. I'm glad I'm at an age where marriage and kids no longer matter to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:19 PM
3

I'm now noticing a lot of older songs about young girls, especially ones that are 17. I don't understand it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:13 PM
2

You have the exact right mindset and it WILL get better. I have been there. Even the friends group thing. He's not that active with the group and I have him blocked, so that helps. But they're MY only really active friend group, so I hate to lose them. If we happen to go to the same event (rare), I keep him blocked in real life too. The friends understand now after witnessing some of his poor behavior for themselves. It just takes time. I'm two years out. I rarely think about any ex nowadays. Ho…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:10 PM
5

That's exactly what I took from this. If one crosses my path, great. If not, that's fine too. I'm exhausted from 25 yrs of dating half ass men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:06 PM
4

This is a solid move. There's absolutely no reason to waste any more emotion on this cheating loser. I thought my coworker was a good dude, but it turns out he got way too comfortable around me and has revealed he's going to cheat on his long term, live in gf (with trust issues) with some old coworker who keeps messaging him to flirt. Men are disgusting 🤢 When I finally rid myself of the abusive ex, I spent a year single. Then I put myself out there a bit and met nothing but trash men, so I stay…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:01 PM
3

Oh I love that website so much (and also love the Miranda Lambert song of the same name).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 02:56 PM
1

The only reason I ever wore makeup was to cover up uneven skin tone and to make my lips pop more. I've been doing the same barely there look since forever. I don't recognize myself in full makeup and much prefer my natural beauty to get just a little touch up. I don't even fuss with my hair. I always wear it long and natural.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 02:54 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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