Love this. What lessons have you learned?

Ka_Tetof99 · 2020-01-03T05:52:59+00:00

There is zero point to having the relationship post-mortem conversation (or usually multiple conversations). Closure is something you give yourself, and oftentimes asking why someone treated you horribly is a wasted effort because there is no reason that will clarify anything or ease the pain for you.

ambermagpie · 2020-01-03T02:09:30+00:00

Trust my instincts and always enforce my boundaries. I had a really bad year with dating: my boyfriend at the beginning of 2019 turned out to have a girlfriend who knew about me, but who I had no clue existed. There was plenty of evidence I ignored... and then when I moved across the country I met someone I immediately clicked with and who I did some wife-y shit for even though he was dating around for the whole time we were seeing each other. And who would get in my head and convince me it was fine and I was asking for too much.

I kinda beat myself up about both but I’ve come to understand I’m a good and sometimes naive person that needs to trust my own initial judgments. I do have good instincts and follow them in other areas of my life. Need to do that with men too.

gursky0 · 2020-01-03T19:50:01+00:00

My biggest lesson is...it's not the end of the world to be single, or to end up single. I've been so afraid of ending up alone, but FDS has helped me realize I can lead a full, fulfilling life on my own. I've finally accepted that I may never find "the one" and get married, and no matter what I'll be ok. That realization is so liberating and will also help me keep my standards high.

Eightxx · 2020-01-03T21:56:44+00:00

I think the biggest lesson I've learned is that I am the only person I can ever truly count on and I am okay with being by myself and have learned to enjoy my own company.

I'm not afraid to cut toxic people out of my life no matter who they are (family members, friends, romantic partners) because I'm not afraid of being alone.

From time-to-time I sit and think about the relationships in my life and decide if what they're bringing into my life is more positive or negative. If you bring me more stress, hurt feelings, and negativity rather than more joy, laughter, and comfort, then I'm dropping you from my life.

I'm not desperate enough to keep anyone in my life when they take more away from me than they give.

I am my priority and I'm not allowing myself to be harmed by anyone when I could instead live in peace and harmony by myself.

Title	Love this. What lessons have you learned?
Author	copingwithshit
Upvotes	79
Comments	6
Date	January 3, 2020 2:02 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/ej8cw7/love_this_what_lessons_have_you_learned/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/love-this-what-lessons-have-you-learned.685727 https://theredarchive.com/post/685727

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