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[–]XiekoFDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Simple and straight to the point. I really needed this today. Thank you.
[–]copingwithshit1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
I needed this as much as you. 💙
[–]NawSisFTFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Only love I’m chasing from now on is self love.
Fkn Moids.
[–]butterdialogue3 points4 points5 points (6 children) | Copy Link
But doesn't this go against what we specifically expect of men? Don't we expect to be chased and pursued and convinced that they are the right fit for us, all the while thinking we are the prize? We make them wait 90 days for sex, we don't accept to go on dates unless these dates are up to our standards and fun and exciting, etc. One could argue that means making a man chase after us to prove their real intentions. But if a man reads this advice (and I would assume it goes for both genders) and agrees (why wouldn't he?), he would be demotivated to go on dates for months with a woman who doesn't seem to be as invested.
I'm not trying to critize FDS - not at all, I think the principles behind this sub are FANTASTIC and long needed - I just want to understand better.
[+][deleted] [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
FDS talks a lot about self respect and leveling up, which is exactly what the OP is saying: chase your dreams, chase your goals, don’t chase someone who has rejected you. The OP is talking about someone that does not see your worth and has chosen to walk away. If a guy wants to be with you, he will find a way. No post on Reddit is going to prevent him from pursuing what he wants. This is the most important thing I tell myself: if he wanted to, he would’ve. No excuses.
[–]DelicateDreamFDS Disciple4 points5 points6 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Men aren’t expected to chase love. They’re expected to demonstrate value as a partner and women are also doing that. The “strategy” here is being high value by honoring your own authentic needs and desires and not being the “cool girl” nor some submissive type. Both of those pander and high value women don’t pander. High value men enjoy giving and initiating. It’s a natural dance.
But both people during this period are evaluating one another to see if they are a match and feelings grow in proportion to connection and intimacy. Having fast feelings, over investing too soon, and trying to desperately win someone is typically a sign of insecurity, male or female. Watch out for “love bombing” men, basically.
[–]dackarooRuthless Strategist1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Thank you! This reminder came at the beginning of my day :)