I often see men on Reddit mention how they'd love it if a woman "took initiative and asked them out for a change." As you know from the FDS handbook, this is a big no.

The simple premise behind this is that men will go after the things they want. If a man is interested in you, he will let you know through his actions: asking you out, communicating with you, planning the first date, asking for exclusivity, etc. Women should being using a man's approach to help us evaluate his character and to vet him. If he is not pursuing you, he is not interested in you (regardless of what story you are telling yourself).

When women chase, men aren't using her words and actions to help him evaluate her character. He's not thinking "wow, here's a great woman who shows initiative and plans thoughtful dates." He's thinking "well, this is easy enough and I don't have anyone else on my radar, so why not?" Not only is a man going to say yes to a woman he's only lukewarm about because it doesn't require any effort from him, he's going to take that as a sign that he doesn't need to invest as much in the relationship moving forward. This is the man who's going to put in minimal effort on your birthday and keep you at forever girlfriend status.

Just wanted to post this as a friendly reminder for anyone who might need to hear it right now. Sending you good vibes today, ladies.