How have you been manipulated?

BlondeHornyElf · 2020-07-24T17:31:46+00:00

If you're dealing with someone and your gut tells you something is off about the situation, your gut is probably right.

Even if you can't prove anything or pinpoint exactly what has got you feeling suspicious, your gut is probably right.

ToldYouNotToWorry_ · 2020-07-25T01:23:29+00:00

if she says she’s not looking for a relationship, that means she doesn’t want a relationship with YOU

if she’s unusually nice to you initially, some fuckery is happening that you don’t know about

if she's more or less chasing you and you can't find any reasonable reason why is she so magnetically attracted to you and persistent other than it's just happening, you should turn on the the warning lights in your head 'cause it's an illusion

If she’s presenting you to the world very soon, you’re being used (or got yourself in a rebound relationship)

If she acts like she has a BPD and going hot and cold in matter of a single day, she’s lying something to you

if something feels odd but can’t exactly pinpoint to what, you’re being manipulated

here’s some blue pill shit of mine, might help someone, ‘cause i’m naive and stupid as fuck sometimes

met a girl online, filled with red flags more than a communist China, but she was interesting and hot as fuck so pretty quickly I’ve decided than she’s not for anything serious and I’m gonna fuck her only. But then she started giving me attention to the bone until the final end, we were texting for two weeks ( I was ill to move things sooner ), and she’s always initiating with personal stuff and nudes, doing a very good push and pull with me. When we finally met, firstly I was blown away how hot she is, but she was cold and neurotic and I couldn’t manage to have a decent conversation with her, beta in me started rolling out. The thing is, she saw me initially as cold alpha and that’s what she needed, just a fuckboy that would do the kinkiest shit to her, because this chick likes dick more air ( did I mention she had a shit-ton of red flags? ). And btw, when girls are like that in that mood with you and dtf, that’s her real self, not a version that she would be portraying for some guy she’s interested, like she will be texting on her phone in front of you not even acknowledging you for minutes and minutes, and beta in me was feeling disrespected, so I got pissed and made a move. We fucked like 20 minutes after knowing each other irl. Sex was great on paper but I was feeling more like I’m performing than enjoying the actual sex, trying to impress her. We fucked a few more times after that and what I didn’t notice is that I was starting to have a desire to own this girl, tried, failed miserably as more and more beta in me dive out. ( If any of you asks me why the fuck would you even want more with this girls, it’s because I’m a moron ) So what do girls naturally do when they suddenly see that some guy is interested in more? SHIT-TESTS! Which I mostly failed to recognize and most of them failed. I’ve thought I fucked up and and about to soft next her, beta in me won.

But no, this girl wasn’t done with me. She cut off bitchy shit-tests persona and straight up moved to like we’re dating or something, bombarding me with attention and affection ( love-bomb? ). She was buying me gifts, bringing me food, texting all god damn day (and not a boring stuff, like being really interesting and taking huge interest in my life), but whenever we actually meet she’s oddly distant and closed for stuff that matter. I started to panic, oneitis started to roll out, and worse of all my dick was too scared to fuck. Here I am, cold alpha in her eyes initially, almost at the edge of the tears demanding respect and having a flaccid dick. She should be pretty fucking done with me by now, right guys? Nope, next morning she’s apologizing, like it happens, we’re under stress bla bla. ( If that happens, know for sure you’re being manipulated, you’re not special, do not believe the illusion that you’re special and that you have beaten women's nature, you have not, unicorns doesn't exist, that's why they're call unicorns, there’s a behind hidden motive for all this ) The whole time she was putting me on social media, like ig stories. So one day, she’s super dovey by day and later that night I notice I can’t see her stories on IG, she blocked me to see them, I open it on another account and she’s posting some other guy on a date or something. I actually call her out on her shit like a biggest beta boy, and she just ignores it, and what can I say we're not in a relationship to say anything we're just FWB. A few days later she finally tells me she decided to go back to some relationship that ended recently blah blah, that I’m good guy and shit. I've managed to get myself to status of poor pathetic beta boy, and all I had to do is to STFU and fuck like a warlord.

She was using me the whole time to make some other retard jealous. And it worked. She played me like a fiddle

Why?

Mostly because I was in so low point with my life, fucked up work, gym, everything.

So it truly is what TRP is saying, improve yourself and don’t expect a girl or any other person to give you that value and to depend on it. It’s all about yourself and your own improvement, otherwise you will have such a low confidence that anyone could manipulate you and you will eat that shit blindly because you want it to be true.

custoscustodis · 2020-07-24T20:43:07+00:00

A few years ago, I found myself unexpectedly in a position of power at work. I started a job as a temp, quickly became an analyst, and then ended up with my boss's job. All of this within 3 months. There was a huge power vacuum at the company and I was a good fit at the time. Right time, right place.

Overnight, I went from a nobody to most of the ladies at work coming my way. Some low key, some super obvious. It was a huge ego boost. When I look back on it, however, all the adulation and validation I was getting was sheer manipulation in one way or another. Did I hook up with one? Yes! But even then, that was her way of securing what she wanted from me.

Some of the tactics I dealt with:

"You look nice!"
Bringing me food
Asking me out
Coming to my office a lot to say hi and chit chat (or taking a break lol)
Flirting with me outright in front of others

In the end I left because the company wasn't a great fit. But some of what I went through bordered on outright sexual harassment.

In the end, they manipulated me and got what they wanted. I got some good bjs after work for a few months. But for them, those benefits at work still continue to this day, even though I have been gone for well over a year.

So, yeah, even if you get sex or oral or whatever from a woman, she will do it if there is a very good benefit. Especially if you are in some type of position of power or status. The same for the adulation, validation and compliments. They stroked my ego (and other things too!) and I used my power to get them some stuff.

Also, I fucked up by fishing off the company pier. So learn from my experience but don't copy it!

thrwy75479 · 2020-07-24T21:03:02+00:00

It all comes down to nice behaviour because it's a great way of exploiting the social principle of reciprocity.

If someone's being nice to you, giving you compliments, flirting with you, giving you free stuff, they want something. Maybe not right away, but it creates an expectation that the "niceness" should be returned.

An example of this is people seeking donations. They'll give free gifts to make you feel obligated to give something back.

Check out the book Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion by Robert B. Cialdini. He goes into various ways that our behaviours can be influenced, and talks a bit about how to handle being manipulated.

Part of growing up is realizing this is simply how the world works. Most things are transactional. There's always an exchange, a give and take involved on some level.

Key point to note is that it doesn't work for sex. You can't negotiate attraction. My personal opinion is that this is why people that are successful in business, typically, aren't successful with women, and vice versa, because they require opposing strategies.

Flaky_Lakey · 2020-07-25T02:07:30+00:00

I got manipulated before. It was bad at first, but it helped me internalise TRP a lot more. You can't be a sailor without experiencing some rough waters first.

There are two things I learnt from this event:

Judge people by their actions, not by what they say
Follow your gut. If something doesn't feel right, it probably isn't

Writing_Good · 2020-07-25T05:05:33+00:00

Was about to be moving in with a BPD girl who was my LTR at the time, felt like I was under a spell when I was around her. Wasn't until I woke up a week prior to move in day with some clarity that I was about to potentially make the worst possible decision of my life did I back out and end the relationship.

What everyone else says, if your gut tells you something is wrong listen to it. Im a pro at failing this one

mysteryspoN · 2020-07-25T13:48:20+00:00

Women that are mysterious, low social media profile etc, can manipulate you subtly. You overthink about them because you don’t know much of them.

Title	How have you been manipulated?
Author	agoodcrayon
Upvotes	1
Comments	10
Date	July 24, 2020 5:23 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/hx5xrc/how_have_you_been_manipulated/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-have-you-been-manipulated.717483 https://theredarchive.com/post/717483

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