Seeking Break Up Tips, Tricks and Resources

WhySoOverHeated · 2017-10-26T05:14:22+00:00

I am just going to write down everything that comes to my mind. I don't know you, but maybe you can use some of it.

I just read this yesterday, by Mark Manson (he wrote Models and The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F***) Comments in this post and in this post helped me alot after my breakup.

Also a couple of things I will recommend to build yourself up again:

Focus on self care. Improve yourself (which you are obviously trying to), spend time on your hobbies, goals.. You will probably have some extra time on your hands now, so fill out this gap with other good stuff. Get into the flow-state.
Spend time with friends/family. Try to cover your needs through them as much ands possible: get your hugs, talk with someone, what ever you need. And just some ideas if you are a bit like me and in the beginning feel crazy and desperate without a man in you life: If you miss the affirmation from the other sex, try to for example dress up and notice their looks. If you miss sex perhaps try masturbating. If you feel lonely see a friend even though its not the same thing. If you need physical contact with others, try giving/asking for hugs, join a salsa class, get a cat, what ever you want. If you miss feeling attractive get a haircut or do your nails for example. If you feel that your self esteem is having a meltdown then try doing something good for others. Things won't be the same as if you had a man, but a lot of needs can be met to a degree by doing other things (which is also imortant to learn, if you like me haven't already)
A gratitude journal. I can't find the post here on RPW in which I was inspired by one of you girls. But this has changed my life! Every night before bed I write down 3 things in my journal which I am grateful for (things that are out of my control. So not "I am grateful that I worked hard on my exam project", but rather for example "I am grateful that I still have my mom" or what ever). And then I fill in the rest of the page with things that happened today that was nice. Even small things like I noticed the smell outside after the rain and enjoyed it, or I cleaned the kitchen table, my friend called me, or what ever. Maybe goals I have accomplished. I recommend this, because: 1) It rewired my brain to look for positive things throuout the day which I could write down later. 2) Almost every night when I go to sleep I feel like "wow, this day actually wasn't bad! Nice" and now I feel like I have 99% great days instead of 99% bad days, which is a crazy turn-around!! 3) after a while I started to notice a pattern in the things I wrote down. I got to know myself better. Aparrently I really appreciate having my own apartment, turning on candles and chatting on the phone with my friends. So now I cut down the usage of Facebook and have started calling people more instead.
And most importantly: let yourself be sad when you feel sad. Don't dwell in it but don't run from it. "Just because you are crying doesn't mean that you are depressed or mentally ill". I had to hear that after my breakup.

5ilent_0bserver · 2017-10-26T04:45:03+00:00

What problems did you both bring to the relationship?

teaandtalk · 2017-10-26T05:39:20+00:00

Don't dwell, but also don't jump into a new relationship. Take care of yourself, improve your RMV, then when you're well and truly over the last guy, you can start dating again.

Title	Seeking Break Up Tips, Tricks and Resources
Author	lightthroughshadows
Upvotes	4
Comments	9
Date	October 26, 2017 4:17 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/78t88u/seeking_break_up_tips_tricks_and_resources/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/seeking-break-up-tips-tricks-and-resources.73655 https://theredarchive.com/post/73655