OK, I get it -- moving out of the house during a divorce is a no-no. Once I file on her I'm making it very very clear to her and the kids that I'm not moving out of the house until the divorce is final (or a very very very good agreement is reached)

She's already probably BPD or something vaguely close. She can lose her shit real good. This wasn't too obvious in her 20's, but it grew as she got into middle age.

In addition, over the years I've been able to take the occasional small put-down/hen pecking from her (and show mostly indifference) but I know she can't take criticism in return. The few times I've been critical of her, she semi-freaks out. Obviously this situation will be over.

The first few digs from her post-filing I will be answering her with equal criticism of her flaws (weight gain, alcohol, untidiness, inability to make friends --- there's plenty to work with) All these things I held back because of being nice to her and protect her fragile ego and keep the peace. Not anymore.

How much she's going to lose her shit the first few times I dish it back to her, I don't know. Will she get the clue real fast and play nice? Or not? How will the kids react?

Any suggestions?