Long term Redpillish wife (new to RPW) looking for advice

TempestTcup · 2013-09-12T13:55:22+00:00

I used to look for other men's attention as validation

Just remember that a man will have sex with a woman who is less attractive than he would choose for a relationship. A lot of validation you were getting from these men was for sex only, not for anything lasting.

Also, keep in mind that right now your husband has Wife Goggles and sees you as you appeared when you met. If you do anything that causes him to remove those goggles he will see you as you are today. Trust me, you want those goggles to stay firmly in place.

Keep foremost in your mind that your husband is the most important person in your life, because he should be. Put him first.

HopefulHoney · 2013-09-13T03:32:33+00:00

Bad habits are a mental shift away from disappearing. What are your triggers? This is where the strong willed differentiate from the weak. Learn what sets you off and that gives you power over it. Then, recognise the habit for what it is. An analogy that works for most is smoking. As an ex smoker I know that when I was smoking a cigarette represented feel good calmness and relaxation. Then I reassigned what a cigarette means to me. I really tasted it fit the first time in a long time. It tasted like chemicals and poison. It stinks. It was gross. From there it was an easy step to never light up again.

Now consider what your habit does to your man. If he knew the truth he would be diminished and it would take a lot for you to make up for lost ground in his eyes. Trust me. I speak from experience. He would hold a little ball of that feeling forever and you might never suspect. You would truly certify that red pill theory is indeed valid. You would become that hypergamous example and he would relearn to trust....but verify.

sugarcrush · 2013-09-12T11:44:26+00:00

Self improvement: have you ever taken a look at married man sex life? It has this thing called the MAP which is mindful attraction plan or something like that, and is basically all about self improvement. If you don't have time for a book right now, you could also just list out the parts of your life, physical, emotional, beauty, skills, etc., and then rank them in importance and start working on them one by one.
Validation. You need to learn to find validation within yourself, with only occasional help from your husband, possibly close friends and family and NO other men. I bet this will come along with the self improvement. I know personally I feel much better about myself when I am working out. It gives me self esteem and I need less external validation.

I know how hard this can be but you will find lots of support here. Good luck on your journey of self improvement.

FleetingWish · 2013-09-12T15:49:44+00:00

I used to look for other men's attention as validation

Honest question, why doesn't your husband's attention fill that need for you?

[deleted] · 2013-09-12T04:21:31+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	Long term Redpillish wife (new to RPW) looking for advice
Author	HopefulHoney
Upvotes	7
Comments	14
Date	September 12, 2013 1:33 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/1m7ueb/long_term_redpillish_wife_new_to_rpw_looking_for/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/long-term-redpillish-wife-new-to-rpw-looking-for.83980 https://theredarchive.com/post/83980

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