This article doesn't sit right with me... Thoughts?

the-capitan · 2017-01-10T10:58:32+00:00

in the last 20 years, pew says the percentage of men who want to get married has fallen from 35 to 29% while women have gone up from 28 to 37%.

on top of that, her article is statistically false. prior generations leveled off at 80%+ married. 80s babies have leveled off at 60% married, and 90s babies have leveled off at only 20% married. if you're not underage and not already married, you're virtually guaranteed to not get married. and even if you're underage, it's still unlikely.

so getting married is an accomplishment in that you're finding someone who is already rare and will even openly admit they want to spend the rest of their life with you (willing to get married). the only point i'm willing to give her is that marriage is not the end game. even with the marriage rate in freefall, the divorce rate has barely nudged down, meaning marriages are overwhelmingly still an epic failure.

kelpieballs · 2017-01-10T10:26:41+00:00

Lmao sounds like somebody settled. She would sing a very different tune if her husband was an alpha.

Willow-girl · 2017-01-10T13:57:26+00:00

I think the author makes an interesting point. Being older and knowing a lot of women from older generations (my grandmother was born in 1913), it seems to me that marriage in the past was often less about "the feelz" than it was about finding a good provider and maintaining or increasing one's social status. In short: for women, marriage was a JOB! And it seems a lot of women went into it with the clear-eyed lack of sentimentality with which modern women chart their careers. (One can hardly blame them, as to choose badly was almost certainly a disaster at a time in which most women couldn't earn a decent living.)

I'll expand on the author's point a little to encompass child-bearing as well. If getting married isn't much of an accomplishment as it only requires a willing partner, having a child requires even less effort! Yet it's frequently lauded as a supreme accomplishment (unless the mother happens to be young, poor and/or unmarried, in which case she's destroying civilization, lol).

loneliness-inc · 2017-01-10T15:25:10+00:00

If you want to get really technical.... Technically speaking, getting married isn't much of an accomplishment at all because you're both running on the high of new relationship energy (NRE).

Staying married is a very big accomplishment, especially if you are married for a long time. There's no way in the world you can be married for 10,20,30+ years just like that. It definitely requires work and is therefore an accomplishment when you succeed.

InMooseWeTrust · 2017-01-10T10:49:22+00:00

HuffPo is left wing circlejerk. Don't take it too seriously.

dunamis_energeia · 2017-01-10T22:29:43+00:00

This is ridiculous.
a) the title is "Getting Married Is Not An Accomplishment" and her conclusion sais "That’s not to say that there is no accomplishment related to being married."
b) she sais "Back then, being a wife is what defined a woman" and her biografy on the website has the following line "devoted wife full-time".
I don't need to tell you anything more about how contradictive she is. Sad that this person is paied for vomiting jibberish.

PinkTulipz · 2017-01-10T20:21:33+00:00

I agree with her in that being married for a long time is more of an accomplishment than getting married. I'm not surprised the Huffington Post, however, is tackling the subject from a feminist perspective.

Marriage (particularly in the last couple decades) is about love. Marriage, unlike careers or academia, carries more excitement on the premise that it is based on a unique and strong emotion.

Seems reasonable to me that a celebration of love is naturally a more emotional event.

[deleted] · 2017-01-10T23:35:34+00:00

Be careful taking anything you read from the Huffington Post seriously. It's fake news at its worst.

The female typist's assertions about a lot of things fly directly in the face of what the data tells us. She's a clown, so don't worry about it.

Silverandgold2 · 2017-01-11T11:36:06+00:00

Well, i can safely say that most of my males friends do not wish to get married. Neither do i. In fact, since high school and collage, not a single of my male friends have gotten married. When 50 years ago, most of them likely would have been.

Feminism destroyed marriage. Me and my male friends talk about it. Not the feminism part, but how the marriage laws make it so no man wants to get married.

I myself am not getting married, that is just out of the question. No matter much i love my girlfriend. Good thing she does not want to get married either. Or at least she tells me she does not want to be. Sometimes i think she says it to make me happy, but, i don't know.

SouthernAthena · 2017-01-14T02:09:39+00:00

Human relationships will always be more interesting than work or academics. That's what I would tell the author. I don't think what she's talking about is a specifically female issue either. While a man's family may be far more happy for him when he lands a great job than if it were their daughter, the joy comes from the prospect of him being able to support a family and his parents when they age. No one is really that excited that he's working on an oil rig. They're excited that their grandkids are going to live well and go to college.

Sure, our achievements in work and school are accomplishments, but at the end of the day what really matters is people. We toil to live, not the other way around.

Then again some of this does have to do with traditional gender roles. Finding a good partner used to be an accomplishment, and an end goal for many people. Now a lot of people see it as incidental.

joshy83 · 2017-01-17T04:32:48+00:00

Yeah just the joining of two people for what should be the rest of their lives. Welcoming another person into your family and at the same time joining another. Finding someone that will ideally be there for you no matter how many degrees you have, no matter how smart you are or become, no matter if you still have your mind or not. Yeah, no big deal.

It's not like you're celebrating the fact that you found someone to "weather through financial woes, illnesses, having kids, and the general stresses of everyday life". You should wait until you actually do that to be remotely happy!

...gah.

kelectro · 2017-01-10T08:09:33+00:00

It's worded more reasonably towards the end, but the rest sounds much harsher

Title	This article doesn't sit right with me... Thoughts?
Author	kelectro
Upvotes	8
Comments	26
Date	January 10, 2017 8:01 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/5n3tw0/this_article_doesnt_sit_right_with_me_thoughts/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/this-article-doesnt-sit-right-with-me-thoughts.86824 https://theredarchive.com/post/86824

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