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Facing my fear: I wanted to have a baby. But as a trans man, I was terrified of labor: The Guardian, as ever, focuses on men's issues from a modern feminist lens.

DougDante

October 7, 2016
9 upvotes
/r/MensRights
http://archive.is/VzzzS
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Title Facing my fear: I wanted to have a baby. But as a trans man, I was terrified of labor: The Guardian, as ever, focuses on men's issues from a modern feminist lens.
Author

DougDante

Upvotes 9
Comments 19
Date October 7, 2016 11:55 AM UTC
(9 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/56az40/facing_my_fear_i_wanted_to_have_a_baby_but_as_a/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/facing-my-fear-i-wanted-to-have-a-baby-but-as-a.940329
https://theredarchive.com/post/940329
Red Pill terms in post
feminist
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Comments

[+][deleted] 9 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]Ooshkii 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I have to agree. I will say that i do disagree with the quasi-naturalistic appeal with that line about wanting to avoid drugs and a c-section. I also wonder if making the process more medically involved might help to assuade the dysphoria.

[–]rg57 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

This subreddit has been fairly accepting of transmen (particularly when they speak about society's disparate treatment of women and men, from personal experience) and should take note of issues faced by transmen.

I think the idea that a person who would take steps to become more male, only to then plan a pregnancy, is pretty strange and contradictory.

Yet, when this happens, other men should be supportive, and demand this man gets the same level of service that any woman would get.

FURTHER, given the way fathers are treated unequally (for example, on immigration to the USA), THIS father should be treated like any other person who has given birth to their offspring.

[–]wasabean 5 points6 points7 points 9 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

I gotta be honest as a trans guy myself - why th FUCK would you want to get pregnant?! I'd rather kill myself than get pregnant, I've had enough dysphoria tyvm. Menstruation is bad enough. If you really want a kid, adopt...

[–]Ooshkii 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

Maybe he has a lower level of discomfort with the idea? To a certain degree, having a child with my genetics is important to me and i could see a net decision in that direction. I guess what i am more curious about is it seems he had a SO. I wonder if the SO's situation affected his decision.

[–]wasabean 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Well, thinking about it, my reaction was a bit over the top. I guess he just doesn't feel that way. I mean, if he had a male partner, it might have been a nice thought to have a child together.

I don't ultimately want to judge anyone. Though I agree that it's not exactly a men's right issue, I don't take issue with his decision. I just cannot relate.

[–]shonmao 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Heck, it seems to be very debatable amongst the natal, cis women if you want to get pregnant or not. It seems to be very polarizing.

[–]wasabean 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You're right, my reaction was a bit too dramatic. Most people, after all, are biologically programmed to want to pass on their own genetics.

[–]rg57 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Actually, in this world we live in, even women should be choosing adoption over reproduction.

[–]wasabean 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Agreed, actually. Another reason why I don't want kids.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

TBF if I had a baby due to come out of my knob I would probably be terrified too.

[–]robochicken11 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

How is this relevant at all to men's rights? It's literally just a story about a man. Please explain?

[–]DougDante[S] 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

News media deconstruction. The Guardian is often critical of men's rights, and this is their view of what a legitimate and newsworthy men's issue should be.

[–]Stunner900 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Transman? You mean a women pretending she's a man.

[–]aokusman 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Men's issue? A woman having a baby?

[–]Ooshkii 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Not being rude, this would be better said as either "a female having a baby" or more accuratly "a trans-man having a baby". The proper parlance holds 'woman' as a gender identification.

[–]CountVonVague 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

"proper parlance" damn are we in Pirate of the Caribbean now?

[–]McFeely_Smackup -1 points0 points1 point 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

men's issues?

[–]boringcarpets -3 points-2 points-1 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Men can't get pregnant or give birth

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