GF smokes weed with her friends at parties when I'm not there

vandaalen · 2017-07-26T13:34:17+00:00

"I don't like when my girl is getting high. Especially not in public."

"Cool. I'll stop." - Yeah

"I will do what I want." - Hard next.

Establish boundaries, let them choose if they accept them. If they don't, just next. A girl getting high at parties, where she likes to go without you, isn't LTR-material anyways. That's the kind of girl you have as plate.

mrpthrowa · 2017-07-26T13:34:13+00:00

You can't prevent the situation. Decide whether it's a red line for you, own your decision and act based on it.

BusterVadge · 2017-07-26T14:01:16+00:00

Is her smoking weed without you around a deal breaker? FYI: She's more likely to fuck chad when she's been drinking than smoking. It's up to you to set your own boundaries.

RPShitlord · 2017-07-26T13:52:51+00:00

You're both too young to be in a relationship anyway.

She's behaving like a single girl, so start treating her as a plate. Don't dump her and don't confront her, just pull back and see other girls. Let the relationship end without you ending it.

BestSC86 · 2017-07-26T15:14:00+00:00

Hell, I would have hard nexted as soon as she started smoking weed....so what do I know.

You are 19yo...she is partying with other dudes and keeping you around for the boyfriend experience when there are no parties going on.

BUT, frankly, you miss the big picture entirely. You are here worried shitless about what your GF is going to do at these parties....YOU have already lost.

Is your GF concerned at all about what or who you might be fucking while she is over with her weed smoking buddies?

No, then she is the alpha in this relationship and you are her beta little baby boy who carries her purse when she wants the boyfriend experience.

1Pink1Stink · 2017-07-26T16:41:19+00:00

CoyotaTamry · 2017-07-26T20:01:19+00:00

Party and smoke weed with your girl. You're 19 wait another ten years or so before acting like a dad.

quicklogaccount · 2017-07-26T16:57:02+00:00

Are you asking if it's a red flag?
For some chicks it's not. For most and yours among them, it is.

She's also kinda flirty with people in general

This reads "showing sexual openness".
Man, some shit is relative. I wouldn't disqualify a chick for LTRs because of a high count, some guys here would. Showing sexual openness - being naturally flirty - is the most absolute deal breaker for LTRs that there is.
She's not "being nice", whether she knows it or not she's ACTIVELY looking for a guy good enough for her to leave you for or cheat you with. She thinks you're a "step", she thinks she can do better and because of that she will not invest in pleasing you, you just get to have whatever she doesn't mind giving.

Well, that said I wouldn't bother about the weed and the guys she's smoking it with. If they were any better than you you'd be gone already and weed doesn't impair the judgment that much.
When it comes to excuses to cheat it works nice but so does booze and your absence.

You're 19 man. If you want a girlfriend you'll need to look at the repressed chicks and embrace their downsides, the regular ones aren't worth of investment.

sand141 · 2017-07-26T17:50:16+00:00

Hmm, I think you mistakenly typed gf instead of plate.

ZakSkellington · 2017-07-26T19:07:14+00:00

man , if I could be stoned all the time I would be stoned all the fucking time.

you seem insecure, so you have to ask yourself if you yourself are just an insecure little bitch or if she is giving you signals/messages to make you feel insecure.

your both young, she's peaking r/n , if I had a gf I didn't trust i'd hard next not worth the trouble. ( I understand young girls "get horney" when boozed up or high or whatever the fuck I think it's just a slut facade personally) I:E when you see the bitch that's had two beers act like tipsy slut.

but sounds like you have your own frame to work on this chick aside.

RedPillN00B · 2017-07-26T19:22:08+00:00

This is dumb, as, fuck...

If your girl is gonna cheat, she's gonna cheat, high or not. Are you one of these people that thinks weed is like Reefer Madness and people can't control what they do after they smoke?

Viking_RnP · 2017-07-26T20:27:06+00:00

Stop with the LTR nonsense. Your post is a glimpse into your life and from what I see it is plagued with worry over some girl who, in reality, is not beneficial to your growth as an individual. If you are emotionally comfortable with plating her, do it. If you're not, do it anyway.

You'll be better off without the commitment. It is clear that you are not comfortable with the commitment nor are you capable of maintaining it without it negatively effecting your life.

She knows she's doing wrong to you, but is testing your boundaries.

Title	GF smokes weed with her friends at parties when I'm not there
Author	herbyx18
Upvotes	6
Comments	21
Date	July 26, 2017 1:25 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/6po0ct/gf_smokes_weed_with_her_friends_at_parties_when/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/gf-smokes-weed-with-her-friends-at-parties-when-im.94724 https://theredarchive.com/post/94724

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