More Feminist Navel Gazing in the Times Today.

pnw_diver · 2015-11-01T16:15:06+00:00

Why is this it worthy of the most-read editorial page in the Western World, one woman's fluffy, inevitable commentary about sexual competition? I can see Huffington Trash publishing vacuous dreck like this but are vague (and banal) "womens' issues" now so critical that "my thoughts on experiencing sexual competition" should appear on the same editorial page as commentary from heads of state and internationally renowned leaders?

I_TRY_TO_BE_POSITIVE · 2015-11-01T21:55:58+00:00

Does everything have to be my fault? Can't you just accept that you're a jerk sometimes?

mjoraque · 2015-11-01T19:31:09+00:00

Actually, this had some pretty interesting moments of self-realization.

That’s the third theory of female competitiveness that I’d like to propose: We aren’t competing with other women, ultimately, but with ourselves — with how we think of ourselves. For many of us, we look at other women and see, instead, a version of ourselves that is better, prettier, smarter, something more. We don’t see the other woman at all.

It’s a fun-house mirror that reflects an inaccurate version of who we are, but we turn on her anyway, because it’s easier. But we don’t need to lower the stock of other women, either for the future of the species or for our own psyches. When we each focus on being the dominant force in our own universe, rather than invading other universes, we all win.

The reason women are so nasty towards other women is because they view it as an attack to their own ego that other women exist.

As a man, I've had moments where just looking at another dude made me feel like I hated the dude just for existing. But upon reflection of these moments, I realized I was jealous of what that dude had that I did not. Money, muscles, etc.

But perhaps because a man is valued for his strengths, men can actually get past that sort of jealousy and respect a man who is strong of body, mind, and character. Even though I may be jealous, when a man out does me I have to accept that he's doing something better than I.

Women are not valued for these traits but rather beauty, youth, and femininity. These aren't really things that engender respect at all. There is no strength behind any of those things. There is nothing to respect about the ability of a young girl to put lipstick on, and have tits.

So instead of ever being able to find respect for themselves by working towards being good or strong at something, they're never able to respect each other as individual women, but only as rivals.

tl;dr: women can't feel respect towards other women, because what women are valued for does not give rise to respect in each other.

Consilio_et_Animis · 2015-11-01T17:21:30+00:00

Someone wake me up when women stop fighting and competing with each other 😴😴

MakeItHilts · 2015-11-01T23:35:45+00:00

I actually found it refreshing, this acknowledgement of intra-girl competitiveness, and how maybe it's not that wonderful of an expression of psychological insecurity and (non)growth. Any "evo psych" thinking which actually appears on the editorial page of the New York Times feels like something of a breakthrough to me.

I'm not sure how we can see a line like this ...

"When we each focus on being the dominant force in our own universe, rather than invading other universes, we all win."

... and not metaphorically nod our head.

Now, the trouble is, of course, that, when push comes to shove, "invading other universes" seems to overlook the idea that boys and men might have universes of their own -- even be allowed such universes -- without it triggering a kind of political backlash and the kind of automatic shaming which results in so much misery and tension and needless caricaturization of "masculinity," and how/why it must be monitored, restrained, and re-directed -- rather than encouraging its freedom and perhaps even acknowledging its importance.

Title	More Feminist Navel Gazing in the Times Today.
Author	pnw_diver
Upvotes	12
Comments	6
Date	November 1, 2015 4:12 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/3r3bv5/more_feminist_navel_gazing_in_the_times_today/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/more-feminist-navel-gazing-in-the-times-today.968167 https://theredarchive.com/post/968167

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