Advice ASAP

notnotnotfred · 2015-02-28T16:51:10+00:00

Hire a lawyer.

Use paragraphs.

Karissa36 · 2015-02-28T19:30:52+00:00

3,600 monthly income divided by 2 equals 1,800. She is getting $1,750. With a 6 month old and a 4 year old, and considering how the judge ruled, I'm assuming that she isn't working. So basically the judge divided the family income in half and you each have the kids about half the time. Her lawyer might have appeared in court pro bono, but that doesn't mean that he will handle an entire divorce without getting paid. She gets joint income for the immediately needed retainer. Will give credit to husband later in property division.

In another comment, you wrote that your lawyer is a family member. That is working against you right now, because the judge assumes he will stay on the case for awhile without getting paid. (Which is true, as you said in another comment.)

He said he has never seen a judge screw someone like this before.

I am saying this in the nicest possible way. You might want to consider retaining an attorney with more experience in family court. (Also /r/LegalAdvice and /r/Divorce are good resources, whether you want legal advice, practical advice or just to vent.) Nothing about your story surprises me. Nothing. Let's walk our way through it. This is reddit, and I'm not getting paid, so I'm doing it quick and dirty. Hang on, dude. It's a rough ride.

Shit happens, wife and baby and toddler move out. Two days later husband files for an order of protection. (Looks bad in court, since she has already moved out. Sorry, dude, but your timing sucked on this one. Due to your timing, you lost credibility.)

Wife decides two can play this game and files for her own order of protection. (Also has no credibility.) Not surprising. Judge grants TEMPORARY order of protection for wife, just like a judge did for husband. Will hash all this crap out in court later and doesn't believe either one of you. Right now, these two just need to stay away from each other.

The judge that signed her order of protection is now also the divorce judge.

Well, sure. It's now pretty clear you two are going to be litigating in the court system for awhile. It is cost and time effective for only one judge to handle your multiple cases, instead of multiple judges having to get up to speed with orders previously issued by other judges, and it prevents the possibility of conflicting orders.

In the divorce case, judge issues a TEMPORARY pendente lite order dividing almost in half all family monthly income and setting parenting time at almost 50/50. An income that previously supported one household now must support two households. You have lost the economy of scale, both of you are now making do with a lot less, and no one is winning.

The judge is clearly not impartial in this case.

Looks pretty impartial to me. Your household income and parenting time was divided at around 50/50.

I have not been given the opportunity to defend anything my wife has put in the divorce papers/ order of protection or dispute the amount the court says I make per month.

It's a TEMPORARY pendente lite order, only in effect until the divorce is finalized. The judge will go off historical tax returns when making this temporary decision. You have the opportunity to file a motion to change this calculation at any time. I don't suggest that you bother.

I make roughly $3200 a month from the VA and Social Security, which is my primary source of income. I also work part time for my parents landscaping/snow removal company, for which I plow snow. Do to the lack of snow this year (Minnesota) and my physical disability, I am only making $200-400 a month from this job.

The judge appears to have taken this into account and has divided equally the current household income. 3,600 divided by 2 equals 1,800. You are paying $1,750. You and your STBX have the kids about 50/50 and are in identical financial circumstances.

all her debt prior to February 26, 2015 is mine to pay.

Dude, you are married. Her debt is also your debt. You will get credit for 50 percent of payments you make now in the final divorce settlement. In the meantime, the judge can't be bothered with mundane details and you appear to be the only parent/spouse with income. This is a TEMPORARY order. Credit for your payment of joint debt during the divorce process will be given later.

I am now forced to break my lease on the house I rent and move out this month. I will also be forced to sell my truck that I use for/work.

Sure, that's divorce. The income that supported one household now must support two households. With a 6 month old, it's going to be awhile before your wife goes (back?) to work, and you can get lower payments. Unfortunately, it looks like the truck is not pulling in enough income to be cost effective if you have a high monthly payment for it. As far as the judge is concerned, now or later, if you can drive a truck with a snowplow then you can do some other kind of light duty work.

So, sure it sucks, but that's divorce. No one is winning. You are not being discriminated against. This is a temporary order and you will eventually get credit for excess payment of joint debt. Your STBX will eventually start working or have income imputed, and your payments will be substantially reduced or eliminated. You might even get alimony. Hopefully, you requested it.

MRSPArchiver · 2015-02-28T16:45:16+00:00

Post text automatically copied here. (Why?) (Report a problem.)

SarcastiCock · 2015-02-28T16:56:01+00:00

That sounds terrible man, I hope you're okay.

I would suggest contacting the National Parents Organization and F4J Minnesota

The_0bserver · 2015-02-28T17:43:28+00:00

Do you guys not have a higher court or something? Here in India, if something like this happens, just file the case with a higher court of law (which tends to have more number of judges on the bench listening to the case), which in turn reduces the chance of such biased acts.

Can you not re-appeal (to a different judge ofc) or ask for the reasoning that the judge followed in giving out this verdict, and if he /she states that it was done as a result of your disability, can you not say that you are stil earning and that in case that is the actual reason then why are you being forced to pay Child Support of this magnitude.

chocoboat · 2015-02-28T18:48:11+00:00

You need a lawyer. If you have one, you need a better one. There must be some way to appeal this judge's terrible decision, or at least have it placed under review by someone.

Infantryblue · 2015-02-28T20:32:43+00:00

[permanently deleted]

hopefulRomanB3 · 2015-04-18T18:01:41+00:00

I'm almost in the same situation as you man! hope that things gotten less complicated for yah. In 2 weeks my divorce is done, leaves me devastated bcus difference between your case and mine is i've told the judge, lawyer that she left me and my kid, cause that is abandonment, i figured i'll win or pay less, The truth is, i pushed my wife away. my best bet is to be true to myself, but its too late. realized all my faults too on why my wife drinks. I've had girlfriend while in the process, waste my time and energy with her, that my wife is simply askin me to do when we were married. I dont want my kids to grow up knowing different woman on my part. We are all desperate, difference is we all have our concerns, yours is money and the judge. Hope everything works out well for you man!

Title	Advice ASAP
Author	Infantryblue
Upvotes	18
Comments	51
Date	February 28, 2015 4:45 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/2xh0ne/advice_asap/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/advice-asap.987006 https://theredarchive.com/post/987006

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