Should people hold themselves accountable for their standards, or be entitled to them without criticism?

Reposting this here since I think I've been shadowbanned from PPD?

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I think most of you have noticed that one of reddit's favorite pastimes is making fun of women who won't date broke men or men under 6 feet. In recent years, I've seen women throughout dating subs and feminist subs protest this claiming "women are entitled to their preferences" demanding not to have their standards criticized. However, I've noticed that these same women will be the first to absolutely chastise and tear down a man for having bod count preferences, telling them to recognize their misogyny and all that. But isn't that sort of hypocritical, considering height and wealth are just as much patriarchal standards for men as chastity is for women? So for this post, I would like you to choose one of two positions and explain your thoughts on the matter.

Option 1: Everyone is entitled to their standards, should not have to lower them, and should not be forced to debate their standards.

If you go with this, it means women can demand men who are 6 feet, 6 inches, 6-figured, have 6 packs, pay the full bill for all dates, and anything else. All of these standards are rooted in patriarchal notions, but women should not be forced to debate them. However, men will not be held accountable for patriarchal standards either. Men should be able to express body count preferences, femininity/passivity/non-assertiveness preferences, preferences for women who will be financially reliant on them, and anything you can imagine. All of the aforementioned standards are rooted in patriarchy, but since everyone is entitled to their standards, men should not be forced to defend their body count/femininity preferences just as women should not be forced to defend their height/masculinity preferences.

Option 2: Standards can have deep roots in cultural notions, and even if people can't be forced to date anyone, they have to examine why they have preferences that reflect patriarchal ideals.

This option means if a man expresses body count preferences, he deserves to be called out, shamed, and questioned until he reveals misogyny/insecurity. If a man wants a tradwife or just a woman who is very passive and/or shy, he should be ridiculed as someone who might be too insecure to handle a successful and educated woman. However, women should still get shamed for chasing tall guys, as that might reflect internalized toxic masculinity. If a woman incessantly demands a financial overachiever, she should be called out as a gold digger. Women who turn down bisexual men should be lambasted for biphobia. Just as men will be called out for patriarchal standards, women will be rebuked for the same.

I ask this question because I noticed hypocrisy from both genders (but mostly women) where they think only they shouldn't be called out for having standards, while everyone else's standards are shallow and bigoted. So, I ask this question to get your thoughts on the matter.