A little under three months ago, my wife left me abruptly in a way that I felt was excessively cruel and damaging. She got off basically unscathed while I was left holding the bag. I lost many friends, money, my house, dog, etc.

I have been trying to do things by the book, including:

•finishing the legal stuff and blocking her everywhere conceivable

•hitting the gym or hot yoga basically everyday

•cold showers

•limiting booze

•re-connecting with old friends

•traveling

•setting new career and financial goals

•casual dates and hookups

•therapy and group grief sessions

•trying new creative outlets

•self administered EMDR and bilateral beats

I’ve been trying so hard to do things correctly and thought that at three months things would get better. But I still think about her and how much i trusted her and she betrayed me knowingly and in a calculated way. I’m tired all the time and it’s hard to focus. I don’t even miss her that much, but the shock of being backed into a vulnerable position and sliced open really haunts me.

I don’t know what timeframe I can look towards to getting my life back. It’s so frustrating she just gets to bounce away while I have to keep her in my mind rent free indefinitely. I just want to purge her from my mind and move on but cannot seem to. People keep saying “time heals all wounds” but I can’t keep doing this forever.