False DV and Custody Pt 2

_splug · 2021-04-01T15:13:52+00:00

Judges prefer status quo. Asking for 50/50 is very likely. In her filing was there any basis for her claims of tracking , etc?

Ignore the emotion. Can’t fight if you’re emotional. Stay factual.

dday_throwaway3 · 2021-04-01T16:57:43+00:00

False DV is a silver bullet to remove dads from their kids. Permanent TRO is unlikely. He needs to fight this TRO with everything he has, right now. He must get this dismissed before he divorces his wife. Otherwise it's going to overshadow the entire divorce proceedings like a storm cloud over his head.
Custody is measured by the number of overnights with the kids, not hours. The "EOW screwjob" which is the minimum a dad would receive is about 20% parenting time: Fri-Sun overnights every other weekend, with a mid-week dinner. Every other holiday and 6-ish weeks in the summer.
You keep saying "we". You don't do a thing. He needs to work with his attorney.
There are advantages to filing first. Most notably, if he had filed first, all of these shenanigans would be quite questionable to a judge.
More double standards from women. Whenever evaluating a stipulation, flip the script. If it's good for one parent, then it's good for both parents. If she becomes the custodial parent which is likely because of the false DV, then she can move the kids away from him.

jkw118 · 2021-04-01T19:11:26+00:00

So basically it sounds like alot of BS. My ex threatened alot, and still does constantly.

I stayed in the house with my kids, she left (and cheated within a week) I would say most of these conversations you should record. I record most conversations with my ex, over phone or otherwise. Most of the time they can't be used in court, or otherwise. But in my case, my ex kept, and still does emotionally/psychologically threaten me. Her and I can't live in the same house, it seriously is bad for both of our health's.. But she'll show up at the door and threaten to force herself back into the house.. Claiming it's all within her rights (it's not, as we have a custody agreement) As well as saying she'll take every penny I make, and all my retirement. I've gotten to the point where I know I'll be screwed over, I'm a guy, with kids and a half decent job. Many courts lean towards giving the mother most of everything.

So to do most of the things she's saying, she's gotta have proof. Calling the cops etc.. as you said in the past, and CAS getting involved can be good for him. Their seems to be some chaotic/hectic things with the ex, is it a stable environment? My ex threated all sorts of things, and she was very chaotic / had some mental issues which were discovered in all of this. So one thing is to talk to the lawyers about having representation for the kids and the kids best interests. This may include having both parents reviewed for where the kids would be best, as well as if everything is stable. My ex would have confusion/ manic episodes etc.. which is freaky as hell for kids. Depending on the age of the kids, they'll take more of a consideration of what the kids say as well.

Ie my 15, and 10 yo, don't want to be anywhere near my ex.. They still go see her, but as soon as their 16, they aren't required to. And technically if the kid doesn't want to go with one parent vs the other. Them grabbing the kid is a major no no. If my kid was in the car and refused to get out. I/nor her can force them to, if I/she did they can call the cops, heck the other spouse can call the cops.

My ex planned the divorce for 5 years.. apparently, only thing was she didn't count on me refusing to leave. She left after I told her, we'd go to a lawyer, get psych evals and evaluations to see who'd be better for the kids, a day later she told me she was moving out.

The primary thing is he needs a lawyer. Their are apps to deal with communication between him and her, and the son. He also needs to make sure he can setup things so if he has their son more then 50/50 that he can handle it, and work schedule wise etc.. Make sure he has people to help support him.

And I can say this much, my ex's parents saw the nightmare that my ex put me through. They even said they were surprised I didn't bail. They saw tons of things the ex did, when I and them were like WTF. Called her out on it, and she ignored everyone and kept going.. Now because they've had to deal with her for awhile, and finally got her on her own. Their saying that there was never anything wrong, and that if there was, it's my fault. Eh I chalk it up to life, at this point they've spent thousands on paying the debt she ran up after we filed, even paid for her new place. Their looking for anyone to help them recoup some of the money they've lost.

Title	False DV and Custody Pt 2
Author	Beneficial_Sun1835
Upvotes	7
Comments	8
Date	April 1, 2021 2:34 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/mhwm0j/false_dv_and_custody_pt_2/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/false-dv-and-custody-pt-2.817285 https://theredarchive.com/post/817285

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