Hi all. I could use some objective views on this mess.

Brief backstory: STBXW (57) fired me (58) after 12 yrs marriage/20 yrs together after getting emotionally involved with someone else, and basically tiring of me for not being as assertive and "competent" as she wanted. I moved out in October and have had next to no contact with her since, though I have stayed in regular touch with her son and his ex-partner and daughter (my step-granddaughter?).

STBXW has since October been pushing her son and his ex to stop me from seeing her granddaughter. Both of them have refused. I see my granddaughter weekly (I don't consider her a "step-" anything since I've been around all her life) and it's one of the high points of my week. I also take her and her mother to lunch or dinner every two weeks or so.

I should add that I think STBXW is most angry at the fact that I see her son and ex (the adults) rather than the granddaughter. But I get the feeling this has shifted to include the granddaughter as well.

STBXW has now cut off contact with son, his ex-P and her own granddaughter because they won't stop seeing me. Her family are all tiptoeing around her too: her brother-in-law has cancelled a meet-up for coffee a couple of times because he's scared word will get back to STBXW.

My read on this is that STBXW is super-controlling (yeah it took me some counselling and reading to reach that very difficult conclusion..../sarc), and that she's punishing anyone who comes into contact with me.

I don't plan to give way on this, and neither does her son or ex-p. It just depresses me that STBXW is willing to sacrifice her own relationships in order to screw up mine.

Any insights? Am I missing something? I feel like I am free of a king-size narc...... thanks for letting me vent!