Just finalized my divorce with my wife. We were together 10 years total and have 2 children 9 and 5. I am 43 and she just turned 31. About six months ago she drastically changed everything about her, (entire top 10 things to look for if partner is cheating) and started "spending more time with friends." She says she has spent her adult life as a wife and a mom and never for herself and just needed to live for herself. After trying to work on things she said was a problem I found out she had been cheating and that was the "friends" she was spending time with. She took nothing but her clothes and some personals (nothing but a couple changes of clothes for kids) and got an apartment. I was the only one with an attorney because we agreed on 50/50 custody, no child support, and how everything was to be split. The first week she moved out she was supposed to have the kids but only got them for one night and that was because it was her birthday and I convinced her to spend the afternoon with them and let them stay with her on her birthday. This week they have been with me all week and she barely calls and they have to call multiple times before she will answer. I have talked with her about letting me have the kids next week on her week so that she can "have time to focus on herself," then the week after they will also be with me. She is all for it but is afraid of what people and the kids will think of she goes almost a month without having them. I would keep them 24/7 if possible and have enjoyed the 1 on 1 time we have had this week. The kids ask questions about why mom doesn't call and when they will see her. I will not/have never spoken ill of their mother around them and I do not plan on that changing. How do I keep them positive and feeling safe and secure and keep them from feeling that their mom loves them and is not abandoning them even though she may not see them for almost a month right after she moved out?