Down and Dirty. STB ex-wife (24F) cheated on me (25M) at a work party a few months back, with a coworker who is also married with a kid. A few months before that, she dropped the “D” word in conversation. We have been married for a year and a half, first 6 months of that I was at some mandatory Army Training.

So essentially, we were married for 9 months before she started thinking about divorce, and one year before she decided to cheat. I gave her a few months to gain my trust back, during which she went on “girls trips” twice, wouldn’t wear her ring to work, wouldn’t want to hang out with me and work on things despite my best efforts to ask her to, and only went to marriage counseling twice, and only because her parents, who adored me, asked her to. She said she “lost her feelings for me” , “doesn’t know what she wants” and has “moved on from me”, so I was at a loss of what to do until a few weeks ago, when I caught her in bed with the same guy she cheated on me with in the first place, and filed the next day.

We’ve been together for 5 years, and have gone through a crazy amount of stuff, both good and bad, with each other, even at our ages. I thought she was going to be with me forever, and I thought our marriage was forged in fire and would withstand the test of time. And I did give her everything I could, from a new house, to a new truck, a dog, and anything else she asked for. And in return, she betrayed me.

I guess my only question is, when the wife cheats, and doesn’t want to regain your trust, how long does it take to realize that divorce is the only option? And why do some women throw everything away after being given the world and then some? This makes me not want to get married ever again.