I’ve been separated for 4 years and divorced for 2. My divorce was quite bitter at the time because my ex wife had an affair, all while angrily denying it and claiming I was making things up...then we agreed to reconcile only for her to immediately start looking for a new man to cheat with. Soooooo yeah, I was heart broken, humiliated and really bitter.

Skip ahead to 3 days ago. She has a baby with her fiancé (she met him well after our drama. I have nothing against this guy). I often wondered if she learned anything from our divorce and made any effort to reinvent herself. Our 10 year old son was telling me if he ever gets married he wants to get along great with his future wife because “mama and Joe don’t get along” I never pry or ask my young sons for information, as I don’t particularly care anymore (nor would I want to use my sons as a way to keep Tabs) but, I did ask what happened. He said they’re always yelling at each other, his mother is always in a bad mood, they say they love each other but they don’t act like they do, etc. I just said that sometimes grown ups get stressed out and it’s unfortunate that fighting is often the result. But in my mind I was kind of laughing with an “I knew it!” kind of attitude. Her actions and sincere beliefs that our marriage difficulties were pretty much all my fault made me think she probably didn’t learn a damn thing and this pretty much confirmed it. I’m torn between feeling bad for her baby daddy, her baby and my sons for having to live through this again on their week with her, or pure schadenfreude for my left over anger for screwing me and our sons over.