Obviously the only one that can tell me truthfully is my wife, not internet strangers that know neither of us personally, but I'm in my head too much at the moment. Also, I feel like she's at the stage where if I even ask if she'd reconsider it'll make her dig her heels in more.

We're supposed to start mediation in mid-July. I had an affair, and I own that I burned this 10 year marriage to the ground. I fucked up and have taken inventory of why I got to where I am and am taking full ownership. I realize that the only thing I can do is become a better person after this and that's the route I'm trying to take. It's entirely up to her if she wants to try to build something new ontop of this heap that I caused.

I do hope she notices that I am serious about making changes, but also worst case is I become a better person for myself. I've cut-out communication with the other girl, I've joined men's groups, started going back to church, I'm working out, stopped drinking and I'm showing up for my kids in new ways, etc.

It's been about a month since the wife found out, she found an apartment immediately and moved out. We have 2 young kids.

I'm keeping the mindset it's not over until it's over and am committed to being the best husband I can be until it's over. Obviously we're talking years of work to get back to a good place, which I am willing to do.

Communication has gotten better, all things considered, she's gotten through most of the anger and our conversations are generally pretty pleasant. We do text or talk most days. She's told me she still finds me attractive, has set-up dinners for the 4 of us, asked my help during her move, she's expressed regret around me not coming to her when it first happened so we could've worked things out. She's also told me how sad she is that I'll be missing important upcoming milestones with her. I am intentionally giving her a lot of space, but I am also an eternal optimist. I don't want to misconstrue these signs that she's reconsidering her decision.

So what does this crew think? Are these potentially good signs, or am I being too optimistic here about reconciliation?