~ archived since 2018 ~
Popular
Other
[deleted]
[removed]
[–]degeT_sTy10 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
As a female virgin hoping to marry another virgin couldn't agree more.
[–]PrestigiousLibrary807 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Right!
It baffles me that RPers think they can rack up as many "notches" as they want and then when they're ready to marry they're going to find their mythic virgin unicorn bride waiting for them... RPers don't seem to place much thought to a woman's thoughts and wants (other than reducing her to a superficial creature who wants a rich, handsome man (never mind about his values)) and who can be "fooled" by externalities and PUA techniques (sure, these work on some women).
[–]samanthamolina9 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
As a 23 years old woman who is a virgin, I find men that have slept with a large number of women very repulsive. They think that the number of partners that a man has had in the past does not matter, but that is false. Men that have slept with a lot of women in the past see women as sex objects, they use women for sex, and they do not respect women. Because of that, they develop personalities that are extremely unpleasant. I would never date a man that has slept with a lot of women in the past because I cannot trust him. If he used women for sex in the past there is a high chance that he will do the same to me. Men that have slept with a lot of women in the past tend to be cheaters, which is not good for serious relationships. In addition to that, once a man slept with a lot of women and showed that he just sees women as objects, I cannot respect him anymore and if I do not respect him, I cannot love him. I have never had a boyfriend and I only plan to have one if I can find a man who is a virgin by choice.
I do not understand why some people think that a man who is a virgin is "low value." That is ridiculous. A man that is a virgin by choice is a man that respects women and a man that would never use a woman as an object. That is a high-quality man and someone like that deserves to be respected and admired, and that is the kind of man that I want to marry.
[–]Environmental-Row9792 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Men that have slept with a lot of women in the past see women as sex objects, they use women for sex, and they do not respect women.
That is not necessarily true. Are there promiscuous men who view women as objects and treat them as disposable? Of course there are. These men are jerks. But they are not necessarily the rule. PLENTY of men who have had lots of sexual partners respect and value women in general and their partners in particular; they just happen to be extremely liberated and free-wheeling. They are also excellent communicators who make sure anybody they're having casual sex with is on the same page as they are.
Further, spend 5 minutes online and it's clear as day that there are plenty of sexually inexperienced men who absolutely loathe and revile women, who have completely dehumanized them, and do not respect women at all.
[–]samanthamolina6 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
That is not necessarily true. Are there promiscuous men who view women as objects and treat them as disposable? Of course there are. These men are jerks. But they are not necessarily the rule.
If they are the kind of men that sleep with a lot of women and are okay with women doing the same then I believe they do not treat women as sex objects. However, if they are the kind of men that sleep with a lot of women but refuse to have a serious relationship with a woman who has slept with a lot of men because "she is used" or something like that, then they are the kind of men that see women as sex objects.
[–]samanthamolina5 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Yes, I know there are a lot of men that do not have a lot of sexual experience or are virgins that disrespect women and treat them as objects, and that is why I prefer men that are virgins by choice because I know a lot of men have no choice. The BY CHOICE part is important.
[–]Environmental-Row9791 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
I know a lot of men have no choice. The BY CHOICE part is important.
Lots of men who are virgins by choice do not respect women either, most often (though not always) under the guise of religion. This is rooted in viewing women as property to be conquered and "owned" by her future husband rather than viewing sexuality as something special that they only want to share with one other person (or an extremely limited number of people) in a lifetime.
[–]samanthamolina4 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Lots of men who are virgins by choice do not respect women either, most often (though not always) under the guise of religion.
You are right. I am not religious, the reasons why I choose to be a virgin until marriage and why I prefer a man that chooses to do the same are based on biology, psychology, and culture. So, for me, it has nothing to do with religion, and when I met a man that is a virgin by choice he also has to have the same values that I have for being a virgin before I consider having a relationship with him.
[–]mammajess2 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
biology, psychology, and culture.
What do you mean? I'm curious.
[–]samanthamolina3 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
BIOLOGY: Men and women are different and experience sex in a different way. One of the consequences of sex is pregnancy. A man's worst fear is to end up spending time, effort, and resources in raising a child that is not his. A woman will always know that the child that she is having its hers no matter who the father is. This is why I think is important for a woman to stay virgin until marriage because it shows to the man that she is marrying that he can trust her to be loyal and to have his children. If she is the kind of woman that sleeps with a lot of men, how can he know that she will not cheat? How can he be certain that the child that he will be raising is his? This is also why I chose to not have sex until marriage. A woman's worst fear is to end up pregnant with the baby of a man that does not want to take responsibility. If he leaves her, she is stuck with a baby for two decades that she has to raise on her own. That is why I believe that a man should remain virgin until marriage because it shows that he is loyal and can be trusted to stay and raise the baby if the woman ends up pregnant. If he is the kind of man that sleeps with a lot of women, how can she know that he will not leave her like he did with the other women he slept with? How can she be certain that he will not get another woman pregnant and be forced to share his time, effort, and resources to support the baby of another woman leaving her and her children with less? That is also why I prefer to only date men that are virgins by choice.
There are also STDs. I value my body. I value the effort that my mother put during pregnancy and labor to bring me into this world. I value the time, effort, and resources both of my parents spent in raising me to become the woman that I am today. I could never forgive myself if I end up ruining my health by catching an STD. A man that sleeps with a lot of women does not value his body, and if he does not care about his own body, how can I trust him with mine? If he does not care about getting a STD himself, he could care less if he gives me one. I cannot risk my body like that. We only get one body for life and we should all care about it.
PSYCOLOGY: Men that sleep with a lot of women tend to be cheaters, have difficulty having monogamous relationships, treat women as objects, and be terrible fathers. A man like that is not a good candidate for a serious relationship.
CULTURE: A lot of the men that sleep with a lot of women claim that they refuse to marry a woman who has slept with a lot of men. They sleep with a lot of women and at the same time shame those women for sleeping with them. They think that is not okay for women to sleep with a lot of men but it is okay for men to sleep with a lot of women and use them for sex. This situation creates men with terrible personalities that end up with the psychological problems I mentioned before, because they think that it is okay for them to be cheaters, liers, and manipulators. They think that it is okay to play with women's feelings. They know that using a woman for sex is bad for her, but they only care about themselves. I could never love someone like that.
Because of all that, I prefer men that are virgins by choice.
Fair enough, that seems logical and consistent.
You're right of course that all sex has a possibility (however low) of creating a baby. People really don't think about that enough.
It sounds like you have given a lot of thought to what you want for yourself and what you hope for in a future partner, which is great! I agree that it's really important to make sure anyone you try to build a life with shares your core values.
Ultimately, I think humans are happiest when they are able to make decisions for themselves, rather thoughtlessly going along with what they're told they should want or allow or tolerate.
[–]EntertainmentNeat5921 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
The difference between the two type promiscuous men is whether they idealize female virginity and sexual double standard. Men who are sexually active but hold sexual double standard “prefers virgin” because they see women as objects to be used and they don’t want women make her own sexual choices. Incels shares the same kind of hypocrisy, but they just hate sexually active women even more because they blame women for sleeping with other men but not them.
While sexually active men who share egalitarian view of sexuality are just sexually liberated and not concerned with a woman’s sexual past either. I know many polyamorous men who are wonderful despite having multiple gf’s. However, they don’t keep double standard regarding dating and sexual history either.
[–]Nur_tir_andaz2 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Same. He is high value since he is a virgin and I know our sexual experience will be something he holds dear to his heart, and I wouldn't have to worry about a poor attitude towards sex and women.
It's a beautiful thing and it's highly desirable when a man denies himself sex until he finds a woman he wants to marry.
[–]samanthamolina2 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Yes to all this!
That is why I find men that are virgins by choice very attractive. They respect women and their bodies. They see sex as something special to enjoy with someone they love. They are loyal, trustworthy, and responsible. Now, imagine how special is to know that I will be his first time and he will be my first time. Men that are virgins by choice have so many valuable things to offer that I will never understand why some people consider them "low value." That is ridiculous. Men that are virgins by choice are truly high value and very rare. I've only known 6 of those men in my life and they are all in very happy relationships. They are all waiting until marriage before having sex. They are very difficult to find and if you find one love him, respect him, and never let him go.
Fully agree. And that's what we want. Someone who puts a high value on sex and intimacy. People who abstain from sex value sex HIGHLY. Period. It's a special part of us that we don't share with family or friends, just with that one person.
If you don't share my perspective about sex, move on. Next person. We don't have to agree on everything. Some guys in this thread honestly fail to understand this. They are here to only argue for arguments sake. I believe this subreddit is about learning and improving, not winning arguments.
I have met a handful of men who have are virgins by choice and those who have had sex, stopped and abstain. Both sets of men are respectful and don't make sex jokes, and are looking for a wife, not a warm body that will cook and clean. That's the type of person I hope to meet one day 🙂
[–][deleted]2 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Yeah, I hated noticed that men who sleep with many women can’t bond and will result in them hating women. I hold sex as special thing, and wouldn’t marry a guy who isn’t a virgin.
[–]thegoodguy30-1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Reverse the genders and you'll be downvoted into oblivion.
[–]EntertainmentNeat5925 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
No, men get downvoted for being a hypocrite and slut shaming women who don’t meet their sexual standard. Everyone is entitled to their preferences but whenever a man is shows preference for “virgins,” it is typically because they see women’s worth based on her sexual history, which is objectifying and misogynistic. While women typically look for their equal in dating department and are not hostile Toward men who don’t meet their sexual standard.
[–]thegoodguy30-3 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
My wife almost spit out her drink reading this, preferring a virgin is misogynistic? Dude quit drinking the kool-aid.
[–]EntertainmentNeat5923 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Dude, clearly the point went over your and your alleged “wife’s” head. Preferring virgin is not misogynistic, sexually active men preferring virgin is misogynistic because it shows sexual double standard.
The fact you are not even capable of seeing the difference between sexual double standard vs preference shows you need to stop the serious amount misogynistic kool aid you have been taking.
[–]zigZag5902 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Men and Women are different Biologically, so our dating and mating strategies are different. There is no double standard because men and women are different... and we both have different standards.
[–][deleted]1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Imagine letting your biology dictate your standards. You're so much better than that
If you keep seeing men and women as different then there will never be equality
[–]zigZag5901 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
I'm sorry that Biology and reality are getting in the way of your ideology. Maybe one day Biological reality will just give way to your weird science-denying ideology. It's definitely not your ideology that's the problem. Biology is. Men can have babies too! I guess your username is apt for this your post.
I believe human beings are more than their biology. Biological reality dictates we cannot fly, doesn't stop me from getting on a plane does it?
Imagine not only falling for double standards but defending them. You're better than this
Ohh great the stupid nonsensical comparisons and then the faux contempt. Just stop this nonsense and live in reality. Your brain is warped by feminist brainwashing. Also we aren't flying.. the plane is and we're inside the plane... Jesus.. I guess you learned "Feminist science".. don't make yourself look more foolish, please. YOU are better than this.
Actually I'm good now I'm to bed with my alleged "wife" stop taking the kool-aid bud.
I do not have a problem with men that say that they do not want to be with a woman that has slept with a lot of men or that they prefer virgins (as long as they have valid reasons). My only problem is when men say that they want a woman who is a virgin or who has slept with not too many men in the past, but they are not virgins themselves or they have slept with a lot of women in the past. I am a virgin and I am not going to sleep with any man until I am married. I do not like men that sleep with a lot of women and I hold myself to the same standard. I also think that the reasons why I prefer to date only men that are virgins by choice are valid.
So men and women are the same? You are free to have whatever standards you want, but in general, Women care less about partner count than men do. That's why men typically lie up and women lie down when you ask about partner count.
[–]samanthamolina1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
So men and women are the same?
Men and women are not the same, and I explained that in my other comments. I also gave the reasons why I prefer men that are virgins by choice, and I think they are valid.
You are free to have whatever standards you want, but in general, Women care less about partner count than men do. That's why men typically lie up and women lie down when you ask about partner count.
I know a lot of women do not care a lot about how many women a man has slept with in the past. One of the reasons is because they focus more on other things like money. But that is also one of the reasons why the current dating market is a disaster. A lot of women ignore men's past sexual history and just focus on something superficial like money. I know money is important, but money comes and goes. The most important things for the success of a relationship are the personalities, morals, and values of the man and the woman. Ignoring a man's past sexual history can bring a lot of problems for the relationship that I already explained in my other comments. A lot of women do this mistake and end up in really bad relationships with horrible men. I know that everyone is free to have their own standards, but I just share this because I hope it can help other people improve their lives when choosing a partner.
[–]zigZag5900 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Your preferences are always valid. My point is that you were talking about double standards and all that. There are no double standards.. that's all I want to say. For the simple reason we are two different creatures with differing biological impulses. We can never have double standards between men and women. Sry I don't know how to quote comment... Reddit Boomer...
You have your opinion and that's always valid too. Once again, my point is biologically it bothers women less. That shows with your experience that women don't care about it too.
I am not here to tell you that your personal choices, values, and preferences are invalid or wrong. You want what you want and it's always valid. All I'm saying is there is no double standard. Men want what they want. Women want what they want. People who talk about double standards are speaking nonsense. That's all. I agree with some of what you said FWIW.
My point is that you were talking about double standards and all that. There are no double standards.. that's all I want to say. For the simple reason we are two different creatures with differing biological impulses. We can never have double standards between men and women. Sry I don't know how to quote comment... Reddit Boomer...
Okay, maybe you are referring to the part where I said:
I do not have a problem with men that say that they do not want to be with a woman that has slept with a lot of men or that they prefer virgins (as long as they have valid reasons). My only problem is when men say that they want a woman who is a virgin or who has slept with not too many men in the past, but they are not virgins themselves or they have slept with a lot of women in the past."
I agree with you that men and women are biologically different and we look for different things in each other. I explained that in one of my comments. I am not sure if you read it, but in case you did not, I am going to paste it below:
Now, that I clarified that. I am going to explain why I have a problem with men that have slept with a lot of women in the past but want to have a serious relationship with a virgin or a woman who has not slept with a lot of men in the past.
I agree that a man has the right to prefer a virgin by choice because if he is going to spend his time, effort, and resources on a baby he deserves to be sure that it is his biological child. If a woman sleeps with a lot of men, he has the right to be concerned about her loyalty and that she might cheat, and he might end up raising a child that is not his. I respect that concern, and that is why I refuse to have sex before marriage because I think that my future husband deserves to be able to trust that I am loyal and responsible.
Now, if a woman is going to have sex, she has the right to prefer a man who is a virgin by choice because she has to make sure that if she ends up pregnant, the man will stay and help raise the child. If he is the kind of man that sleeps with a lot of women, she has the right to be concerned about his loyalty. If he slept with many other women in the past and left them, she has the right to be concerned that he might do the same to her. She also has the right to be concerned that maybe after they both have children, he might cheat with another woman and get her pregnant, and then he will have to divide his time, effort, and resources between her children and the child of another woman, leaving her and her children with less. Or worse, what if he leaves her and her children for the other woman. I think that a man should respect that concern and show that he is loyal and responsible by staying a virgin by choice until marriage.
And that is the problem with the double standard. Yes, men and women look for different things in each other but in the end, both of our concerns are solved with loyalty, trust, and respect towards each other. So, if I am a virgin by choice and I am going to give my future husband peace of mind that I am loyal, trustworthy, and responsible and that the child he will be raising is his biological child, why don't I deserve a husband that is also a virgin by choice that will give me peace of mind that he will stay and provide his time, efforts, and resources to help me raise our child? Why can a man demand loyalty, trust, and respect, but refuse to offer the same in return? Are women's concerns less important than men's concerns?
I see now. I agree with you. Ideally, all women and men should wait until marriage to have sex. That's what built our society into what it is today.. but that society is dead until the correct one crashes. The thing is I don't agree with you that a man's loyalty, trust, and respect is connected to him being a virgin or not. A man's value is in his ability to provide, protect and care for his woman. A non virgin man simply means other women have found him valuable enough to give their bodies to him.
However, you are completely within your right to ask that he be a virgin. The data shows that when a woman like you marries, you're MUCH MUCH MUCH less likely to get divorced. You are looking for the right things in a relationship instead of superficial things.
Our only disagreement is about whether non virgin men can be tied to those things you said. I'm not sure it is, but maybe there is data out there. I mean there is, but it wasn't broken down into male/female...
In general, don't listen to anyone about your preferences. They are yours and yours only. Only thing that matters is if you can find a man to fulfill them.
The thing is I don't agree with you that a man's loyalty, trust, and respect is connected to him being a virgin or not.
A man's loyalty, trust, and respect are connected to him being a virgin if he is a virgin by choice. The BY CHOICE part is important. Men that sleep with a lot of women tend to be cheaters, have trouble being in monogamous relationships, use women for sex, and treat women as objects. Cheating and lying is one the things that men often need to do in order to sleep with a lot of women. These kinds of men tend to not care about women, they only use women to satisfy their desires, and they feel no remorse about it. A man with these characteristics is not capable of loyalty, he is untrustworthy, and he does not respect women.
A man's value is in his ability to provide, protect and care for his woman.
Yes, I agree that a man should be able to provide, protect, and care for his woman, but women tend to measure that standard based on superficial things like whether he has a house or not, and the amount of money he has. Yes, money and resources are important but what is more important is whether that man wants to use those resources and money to provide for his woman and children or not. There are men that have money and resources but they do not want to use them to provide for a family. They only want the resources to attract women so that they can use them for sex, and a lot of women fall into this trap. This is also why I think women should care about whether a man sleeps with a lot of women or not. Because the mistake that a lot of women do is that they waste a lot of time chasing men that have money and resources thinking that "they can provide, protect, and care for them" but they do not realize that a lot of these men only use those resources and money to attract women to use them for sex. A man's money and resources have no value for a relationship if he does not want to use them to provide for a family. This is why I think is important for a woman to avoid men that sleep with a lot of women because these men will never be loyal, trustworthy, and respectful, and it is impossible to build a family with someone like that.
A non virgin man simply means other women have found him valuable enough to give their bodies to him.
That is why every time I mention that I want a virgin man, I also mention that he has to be a virgin by choice. Yes, there are a lot of men that have no choice because not many women find them desirable, but men can be virgins even if they have the chance to sleep with a lot of women, they only have to choose to remain virgins. It is important to me that a man is a virgin by choice, because just being a virgin does not mean anything. The reason behind the CHOICE is what makes him a good person. Just like I could have sex with men if I wanted, but I choose not to do it because I have a set of values and important reasons behind my decision, a man can make the same choice. Generally, I find men that are virgins by choice very attractive because they respect women and their bodies. They see sex as something special to enjoy with someone they love. They are loyal, trustworthy, and responsible.
The problem I have with your comment is basically there are guys who are virgins... and then there are men who sleep around a lot. It doesn't seem like there is nuance in your thinking. Like the guy who isn't a virgin, but has had a few girlfriends (short term and long-term) doesn't exist in your worldview. You aren't wrong about those types of men... but the reality is those guys are the minority. But we get back to Biology again haha... The guys who are super successful getting sex is the guys you are paying attention to. The average guy doesn't exist 😂😂😂.. Not laughing at you just funny.. I found this sub today while searching for something else and you already proved Redpill theories to be correct...
See? Once again you only see the guys who are rich and hookup casually with a lot of women... You're unintentionally proving all RP theories:) But I agree with you that you should avoid such men. The question for you is... will you be happy with an average man? I ask because it doesn't seem that guy exists in your worldview. The guy who is working class who makes $50,000 per year. He's reliable but he's not gonna take you to Paris.
The type of man you want will be a religious man. I don't see many men like that today, but I hope you find the man for you :).. I can't find any statistics on Virginity of men who are virgins by choice. My only advice to you is to not be Lolo Jones... ain't no high value man gonna marry a 37 year old virgin lol.. just don't be her and you will be fine. Marry before 25 ideally. https://www.cheatsheet.com/entertainment/the-challenge-lolo-jones-admitted-starting-to-give-up-hope-finding-love.html/
See? Once again you only see the guys who are rich and hookup casually with a lot of women... You're unintentionally proving all RP theories:)
When I was talking about the resources and money of men, I did not mean that I just look at men that are extremely rich. You said that a man's value is based on his ability to provide, protect, and care for his woman, so I just wanted to illustrate how that is not precisely true because even if a man has the resources to provide if he does not want to provide for a family then his resources are not valuable for a relationship no matter how much he has. That was my main point. The important thing is his values.
The question for you is... will you be happy with an average man? I ask because it doesn't seem that guy exists in your worldview. The guy who is working class who makes $50,000 per year. He's reliable but he's not gonna take you to Paris.
Yes, I would be happy with an average man that makes $50,000 per year. In fact, I have another personal standard that I follow which is that I only consider dating men that make $50,000 to $90,000 per year because that is what I will be making once I graduate from college and as my career progresses. Just like, I only date men that have the same values that I have, I also only date men that make around the same amount of money that I make. I also have a strict rule for not dating men that make a lot more than I do, and I have different reasons for that, but I was not discussing that here because this is a post about virginity. So, as you can see I am reasonable with my standards for income, and even then a lot of the men that I know that make or have the potential to make the same amount of money that I will make in my career cheat and use women for sex. They might have fewer opportunities than extremely rich men to do it, but they still do it.
The type of man you want will be a religious man. I don't see many men like that today, but I hope you find the man for you :)
They are not religious men. My reasonings are based on biology, psychology, and culture, so they are different from the views of religious men. And I know there are not many of those men. Genuinely good men are difficult to find. They are extremely rare. But I already made peace with the fact that if I do not find a genuinely good man, then I'll just die alone. I really do not want to marry the wrong man and end up with a broken home. That will be devastating for my children and I do not want that for them.
Yeah but provide doesn't mean ultra-wealthy :)... but women have so many resources from the state that the idea that you will be left alone is not true. But I think you have the same mentality as the black pilled guys who say all women are sluts and to not get married. It's just you do the opposite.
Another red pill theory proven true. What you described is called Hypergamy. Women date up and not down. Basically your whole dating strategy seems to be coming from the point of mistrust and suspicion. I'm not saying not to be smart, but you honestly sound like a lot of the incel guys, but just the opposite... Your standards are normal for women.. it's your biology. You might think they are reasonable but you are just as hypergamous as any other woman.
The whole no sex before marriage and voluntary virginity is definitely a religious Christian thing. If you are willing to live alone and end up like Lolo Jones, I mean it is what it is... but it's you who will suffer for it. My honest opinion is you sound like the female equivalent of the guy who is like all women are sluts, I'm not gonna get married unless I find a virgin tradcon wife who is 18 years old. if you have made peace to die alone then I just wish you the best.
Yeah but provide doesn't mean ultra-wealthy :)
Exactly, that's my point it does not matter if he just has enough to survive (and also needs his woman to work to have enough for a family), is middle class, rich, or ultrawealthy. It does not matter how much he has, the important thing is that he wants to use what he has to provide and a lot of men just don't want to do that. That is why I say that the important thing is his values. The example I gave before was just an example to illustrate how sometimes women ignore values to just focus on money.
I know that women are hypergamous. I am not denying that. I understand is part of our nature. I've seen how a lot of women let hypergamy ruin their lives because they focus just on money and not values. That is why I work on myself and try to do my best to not make the same mistakes. I already said that I only date men that make around the same amount of money that I make because what I make is not much and not enough to raise a family so we will both have to work. I also said that I do not date men that make more than I do, which means anyone who makes more than $90,000 is a no for me and I have my reasons, but that is not the topic of this post. So, I think my income standards are reasonable and that I have my hypergamy under control.
But what you just said is not true. It's based on feminist man-hating rhetoric. the 98% of men are average guys who want to love a good woman and take care of their families. It's telling that you focus on the small 1-2% minority.
Hypergamy isn't just about money. I don't think your wants a reasonable. The money part certainly isn't because you don't want guy who make over 90%. But the sexual and values part isn't reasonable either.
But the sexual marketplace is exactly that. It's a marketplace. What matters is you will be able to find a man who can give you what you want and he wants you too. If you can't, then it means your value is too low for what you want.
overall, I think you are exactly what you seem to oppose. You don't seem to like men in the same way that incels don't like women. With that attitude it's going to be hard for you to have a happy and successful relationship.
Okay, so I think we are moving away from the main topic of this threat which is male virginity, and how some people consider men that are virgins "low value." Income and hypergamy are two other completely different topics. I answered your questions about hypergamy and income since you asked, and I think you deserved an answer but I also said many times that those are not the main points of this threat. If we keep moving away from the main topic we will never reach a conclusion, so I think is better if we stop doing that. If you want to discuss hypergamy and income you can create another thread in this group and we will discuss it there.
Now, back to the main topic which is male virginity and how some people consider men that are virgins "low value":
I am not sure why you would think that I hate men. I think that I have demonstrated the contrary with my comments here. I CARE about men, and because I care about men I am sharing my perspective as a woman about what I think about men that are virgins.
The point of all my comments here is that contrary to what many people claim being a man that is a virgin is NOT a bad thing.
I already stated in my other comments to you and other users that I find men that chose to be virgins are very attractive because they respect women, they are loyal, honest, responsible, trustworthy, and see sex as something special to share with someone they love. I also stated the biological, psychological, and cultural consequences of sleeping with a lot of people (that goes for both men and women) and explained why remaining virgins until marriage is actually a good and beautiful thing.
I also stated in my other comments to you and other users that men that sleep with a lot of women tend to develop bad personalities, be cheaters, have trouble being in monogamous relationships, and treat women as objects. That is not good for serious relationships and building families, and you cannot blame women like me for not finding that attractive. Besides, if a man aspires to be a genuine good man, why would he want to be someone like that anyways?
All I am trying to do here is to help men see that contrary to what a lot of people say being a man and a virgin is not a bad thing, on the contrary it is a very good and beautiful thing. A lot men feel very depressed for being virgins or not being able to sleep with a lot of women. Others voluntarily chose to not do it because of their beliefs and they are shame by society. I am just trying to help men see that they do not have anything to be ashame of and that there are women in this world that actually value them for their choice of being virgins. If you go back and read my other comments and responses to you and other users you will see that there are other women that agree with me. I do not understand why would you think that I hate men when I clearly care about men and I want the best for both genders. Mental health is important and being depressed can affect men's life and health in general. Life is already hard, I do not want men to also feel depressed for something that is not even bad and add unnessesary problems to their lives. I also hope that if some men were planning to sleep with a lot of women and were able to find this post before doing it, see a different perspective and maybe what I explained here can help them make a better choice for themselves. My only intention here was to help men improve their lives.
So, if you have anything to add related to the main topic of this thread, then we'll talk about, but we cannot keep moving away from the main topic or we will never reach a conclusion.
I think me and you are talking past each other. As I said, I agree with you on that. My point is that you are always looking at the overwhelming minority. You did it with guys sleeping around, because as I said. most guys (the ones that aren't virgins) aren't hooking up with that many girls. You are a woman so you don't understand how hard getting sex is for the average guy. You focus on the 0.000000001% of guys who are having 80% of the sex.
99.9999% of male virgins are NOT virgins by choice. They want to be out there having sex and getting girls. The depression comes from that. Wanting and being able to get that is what makes them low value. You are free to try to convince those virgin guys that being a virgin is a good thing, but I don't know how much success you will have.
I agree with you and I know that only a minority of men are having sex with a lot of women. I also know that the majority of men have no choice but to be virgins because women do not want to sleep with them. I know that just being a virgin does not make a man a good man. This is why I say that a man has to be a virgin by CHOICE to have value because his value is not determined by his virginity but by the reasons that back up his decision to be a virgin. I am going to try my best to give an example of how that works below:
Category one of men:
Man #1: He is rich, tall, and handsome. He has access to sleep with a lot of women. He CHOOSES to sleep with women without the intention of committing to them.
Man#2: He is financially stable, not tall but not short either, and average-looking. He has a few women interested in him, but not too many. He CHOOSES to sleep with women every time he has a chance without the intention of committing to them.
Man#3: He is poor, short, and not good-looking. Nobody is interested in sleeping with him. However, he knows that if he could sleep with a lot of women he would CHOOSE to do it without the intention of committing to them. The only thing stopping him from sleeping with a lot of women is that nobody wants him.
Category two of men:
Man #4: He is rich, tall, and handsome. He has access to sleep with a lot of women. He CHOOSES to NOT sleep with women without the intention of committing to them, even though he has many opportunities to do it because he has respect for women and is a genuinely good man that would never use a woman for sex.
Man#5: He is financially stable, not tall but not short either, and average-looking. He has a few women interested in him, but not too many. He CHOOSES to NOT sleep with women without the intention of committing to them, even though he has some opportunities to do it because he has respect for women and is a genuinely good man that would never use a woman for sex.
Man#6: He is poor, short, and not good-looking. Nobody is interested in sleeping with him. However, he knows that even if he had the chance to sleep with a woman he would CHOOSE to NOT do it unless he has the intention of committing to her because he has respect for women and is a genuinely good man that would never use a woman for sex.
All the men in CATEGORY ONE are the same. They all would use a woman for sex just to satisfy their desires without remorse. The only difference between man#1, man#2, and man#3 is the number of women that pay them attention, but given the chance, all of them will use a woman for sex. They are all bad, and the fact that man#3 is a virgin has no value because given the chance he would just do the same thing that man#1 and man#2 do. However, all the men in CATEGORY TWO are genuinely good men, because no matter how many women pay them attention, they would never use a woman for sex. Their virginity is valuable not because they are virgins but because of the reasons that back up their CHOICE to be virgins.
You say that I only see bad men because I only focus on the minority 0.00000000001%, and I think you are referring to what I described as the man#1, but that is not true. Because the majority of men of our society are part of the CATEGORY ONE of men, that includes man#1, man#2, and man#3. Only the men in CATEGORY TWO are genuinely good men. If a man is "good" because he has no choice, then he is bad. Genuinely good men like those in CATEGORY TWO are good because of their values, and their values do not change based on their looks or money. And even you know that, because you admit this:
99.9999% of male virgins are NOT virgins by choice. They want to be out there having sex and getting girls. The depression comes from that. Wanting and being able to get that is what makes them low value.
You admit that the majority of men are not sleeping with a lot of women just because they have no choice. The majority of men are like man#3, but man#3 is not a good man, because he just has no choice but to be a virgin, but given the chance, he will use women for sex just like man#1 and man#2. The three of them are just as bad.
That is why I emphasized the CHOICE part every time I talk about a man choosing to be a virgin. He has to be like the men in CATEGORY TWO in order to be genuinely good. The majority of men just want to sleep with a lot of women for the wrong reasons that are not good for themselves, women, and society in general. I am just trying to help men see that if they have not slept with a lot of women yet and plan to do that, they should consider that maybe is not as good as they think it is. I am just trying to inspire men to be genuinely good men and help them not be depressed for something that is not worth it.
Okay, so if I understand you. Basically it's being "The shit" and choosing not to go fuck other girls when you can. I don't agree with you here.
I could fuck other women, but I love my wife and I'm completely committed to her. This is one issue with being a virgin I think. You have no practical experience without romantic relationships, and so you boiler plate things done to this.
In my experience. Most men are just looking for one women to love. There are men who cheat ofc. But i'd say the 95% of men want a woman who will stand by him for life.
The issue with your hypothesis is that you don't have the practical knowledge of being in long relationships to understand the men you are talking about now.
Basically, I agree with your assessment on what makes a man good or not. However, category #2 men are the overwhelming majority. That's the big area where you are wrong.
[–]Available-Ad-93381 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Why are you offended by virgin women who want virgin men?
It's funny how RP obsess over women with low/no N counts but you mock a 37 year old woman for staying a virgin? So is virginity positive or negative for women? Make up your mind.
Where was the offense? I think you are projecting your insecurities and anger on me. I just pointed out that you shouldn't wait so long to settle down. You completely missed that.
You right
[–]thetruthishere_5 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
I lost my virginity to another virgin...
[–]Environmental-Row9794 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
As someone who is attracted to and dates people across the gender spectrum, I truly do not care how many people my partner has been intimate with before me (provided they have taken appropriate precautions for safer sex and are upfront with me about any STI risks).
Since I’m pushing 40 myself, it’s been quite some time since I was with someone who was completely sexually inexperienced, but when I think of the men/masc. folks I’ve been with, the less experienced ones were often better lovers since they had fewer preconceptions about what I wanted and were more inclined just to ask me what I enjoyed.
Honestly, if a dude brags about his sexual prowess, my automatic assumption is that he probably sucks in bed.
ETA: In my experience, people become better lovers through multiple encounters with the SAME person (or people!). And that means you’re not racking up as many new partners.
[–]PrestigiousLibrary804 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Ain't that the truth 😂
people become better lovers through multiple encounters with the SAME person
Also very true
I laugh when RP gurus boast about how good they are at making women orgasm. I guarantee that 90% of those women are faking it.
[–]mammajess1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
In my experience, people become better lovers through multiple encounters with the SAME person
Yes. Definitely. If you maintain your relationship's non-sexual intimacy and communication skills and don't fuck it up by being assholes to each other it should get better and better over time :)
[–]RabbitNRaccoon3 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Women who like excitement, emotional rollercoasters, drama, attention, risky sex etc are turned off by virgins.
The red pill focuses on a very specific archetype of women. And those women make up a decent portion of females in Western countries. But they are by no means all women. They are just usually extroverted, hypersexual so they stand out more.
I would say a more chill, introverted, girl who doesn't like all that extra shit women these days do wouldn't have any problem with a male virgin or man with a low count.
I've noticed alot of men "playing" with the wrong kind of women for them. That's where alot of their disappointment comes from. A male capybara ain't got no business hanging around female leopards no matter how sexy they are. And when one inevitably takes a bite out of his ass, he runs away crying.
I think most people will be accepted by those people in their same lane. And rejected and ridiculed by those outside of their lane.
So it's best to stay in your own lane with people who value what you value.
[–]FlakyImpact58383 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
I think you’re right on, but let me talk about when you said that although women may not a virgin man or a hookup, a relationship would be different. The thing is that TRP is not designed for men to be in long-lasting, healthy relationships. It teaches men to “spin plates” as they call it, or switch between multiple women for dating and sex. Not saying you’re wrong or anything here, but TRP does encourage a mix of short term dating and “pump-and-dump.” Relationships made vos TRP aren’t made to last.
I do think it’s silly that TRP preaches that a man with a higher notch count will be treated like Jesus by many women. Being a lady killer isn’t the kind of man every woman wants. Unfortunately, a lot of insecure women fall for TRP men that manipulate them into the bedroom. These guys can be weird.
I do think it’s silly that TRP preaches that a man with a higher notch count will be treated like Jesus by many women. Being a lady killer isn’t the kind of man every woman wants.
I find men that sleep with a lot of women, use women for sex, and treat them as objects repulsive. That is why I only give men that are virgins by choice a chance for a relationship. If he has a lot of past sexual partners, there is no doubt he does not respect women and I cannot respect a man like that.
[–]AutoModerator1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
The rules of this sub are heavily enforced. Please take a few minutes to familiarize yourself with the purpose of this sub and the rules on the sidebar to avoid your post/comments from being removed and/or having your account banned. Thanks for helping to keep this sub safe for those detoxing, leaving, and/or questioning The Red Pill's information. For FAQ please see the Red Pill Detox's First Aid Kit.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.created by /u/dream-hunter
[–]degeT_sTy10 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]PrestigiousLibrary807 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina9 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Environmental-Row9792 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina6 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina5 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Environmental-Row9791 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina4 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]mammajess2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina3 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]mammajess2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Environmental-Row9791 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]EntertainmentNeat5921 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Nur_tir_andaz2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Nur_tir_andaz2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–][deleted]2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]thegoodguy30-1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]EntertainmentNeat5925 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]thegoodguy30-3 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]EntertainmentNeat5923 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]zigZag5902 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–][deleted]1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]zigZag5901 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–][deleted]1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]zigZag5901 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]thegoodguy30-1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina3 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]zigZag5901 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]zigZag5900 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]zigZag5900 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]zigZag5901 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]zigZag5901 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]zigZag5901 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]zigZag5901 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]zigZag5901 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Available-Ad-93381 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]zigZag5901 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–][deleted]1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]thetruthishere_5 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Environmental-Row9794 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]PrestigiousLibrary804 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]mammajess1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]RabbitNRaccoon3 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]FlakyImpact58383 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]samanthamolina2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]AutoModerator1 point [recovered] | Copy Link