[deleted by user]

PrestigiousLibrary80 · 2022-01-07T01:27:40+00:00

This doesn't seem like it is healthy, bro.

You're concerned enough about it that you're seeking advice online, so I'd say deep down you know it is a problem.

You're in your 20s, which should be a time of connecting and reaching out and meeting people, it doesn't seem healthy that you are not connecting.

I know lots of people and pro-sex work on reddit but I disagree. The people I know who pay for escorts are maximising the short term in sacrifice for a long term. It seems as though it is inhibiting your ability and desire to connect with women. Escorts provide the benefits of sex without the responsibility -- real connections without the financial imperative will force you to be the type of person people want to connect with.

Thekidbkj · 2022-01-06T20:13:58+00:00

It’s only a problem if you think it’s a problem. I don’t blame anyone for seeing sex workers especially if you struggle with dating. Fuck we all need human contact and not all of us can get it easily. Maybe it’s not the healthiest coping mechanism but who actually has healthy coping mechanisms?

hippy_speed_ball · 2022-01-06T22:05:23+00:00

What are you looking for?

If you're looking for no strings sex, escorts (woman or trans) is a perfectly reasonable way to go about that. As long as you are being a good and respectful client who doesn't hurt or abuse the escorts.

If you're taking advantage of trans women's vulnerability in society pretending to date them seriously, but just using them for sex... Don't do that. It's not cool.

If you're looking for a relationship, something more meaningful, you probably want to put your money and effort elsewhere. You probably want to put a bit of money into a therapist not because I think you're crazy or anything like that, but because that's exactly the person you should be asking this kind of question to.

You say you're not attractive enough to date online and that of course women reject you. To me that tells me that you have a poor sense of self worth. Regardless of how attractive you are to others, you shouldn't be judging yourself so harshly. Again a therapist could help you work on seeing yourself as worthwhile.

JUST_WANTTOBEHAPPY · 2022-01-07T00:17:07+00:00

That depends if you want to view your "addiction" seriously.

I can tell your firsthand there's no glory and satisfaction down this path. I been 6 month sober from my escort addiction and never want to go back.

Write down the pro and cons of finding escort. And think about it seriously. Only you can decide if its worth it.

I was lucky cause I have good healthy support system I can turn to when I'm feeling lonely. I have a good female friend I can confide to when my lust out of control. I have few close male friends that know my struggle with this fucking addiction that I can be 100% vulnerable with.

I think the catalyst for my change was when I met this girl months ago, that is love at first sight. That I start to take my addiction seriously. If we ever got together I don't want her to know, that I'm someone with impulsive uncontrollable decision.

I guess my point is find your reason and find a good support system to beat your addiction. If you want to take this seriously

thetruthishere_ · 2022-01-06T23:10:23+00:00

What online dating sites do you use? Dont use Tinder, its 80% men. Just number alone is not good odds for most men even using it. How is your profile and pictures? Men tend to be bad with OLD pictures... Im betting youre better looking than you think.

Reality, if your life doesn't revolve around seeing escorts, you're not going broke because of it doing nothing else with your life and you're good to the escort... Its not that big of a thing while trying to find someone.

I will say there are women that will reject you because you've seen escorts just like some men will reject me because Ive done escorting.

Most men that see escorts are perfectly nice fellas but the stigma is big in the US for both.

Edit to add, you have a lower chance of catching STDs seeing quality escorts. We are very proactive about our sexual health, test often and never go unprotected.

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Mriconicdev · 2022-01-06T20:50:35+00:00

I don’t see an an issue here with escorts at all if that’s what you want to do that’s your choice BUT you still need to be getting out there and shooting your shot. Rejection sucks it happens to all of us but you gotta keep going you can’t give up because then you will be just escorting it up forever.

luridlurker · 2022-01-06T21:01:34+00:00

As other commenters have pointed out, this is only a problem if you are finding it a problem. There is nothing inherently wrong with seeking out sex workers or exploring your sexual desires with a large number of other people.

Clean, regular testing and always using protection are great. You can also minimize (some) risk by limiting the escorts you see to a select few who you feel also take safety and health seriously. This can have the added benefit that being a regular means you can develop a better client/worker relationship.

The other health aspect to this is managing how you're viewing sex workers and sex work. If hiring escorts feeds into believing women are "other" and not just individual humans with the same diversity, breadth and depth as men, you'll be furthering your isolation and reducing your chances at a fulfilling long term relationship. It can also feed into the false notion that men are only valuable for money and that sex is always transactional. Holding these false beliefs also can harm your chances at a long term relationship.

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	5
Comments	11
Date	January 6, 2022 7:40 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/rxn0nj/deleted-by-user/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/deleted-by-user.1599333 https://theredarchive.com/post/1599333

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