Dating multiple men

SaddleUpBucephalus · 2020-03-12T16:49:34+00:00

Read and re-read the Handbook

https://www.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/d2lg9t/girl_game_pt_1_males_monogamy_and_mateguarding/

https://www.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/feixg6/no_excuses_date_multiple_men_until_commitment_is/

aclumsygirl · 2020-03-12T21:59:19+00:00

I have three in rotation right now. Two I met irl and one off OLD. They're all very respectful, good looking, good company. One I like more than the other two, and he's the most attentive of the three, but since I'm not super invested in any of them, I just sit back and see what happens.

"So recently guy I’ve been seeing dumped me for another girl."

So if this happened with one of mine, of course I would cut him off. If he made the decision to stop seeing me so he could pursue an exclusive RL with someone else... obviously there's not much else we have to say to each other. If I drop him for another, same thing.

"How do people form relationships nowadays when I have such a hard time finding a guy as bf not fwb."

Don't settle for less than you want. OLD tends to be slim pickings so practice going out and meeting men IRL. Not that it's easy right now with all the virus quarantines and cancellations 😷😂

traditsh · 2020-03-12T17:41:23+00:00

I'm gonna address this point by point:

How do you cultivate a rotation of men?

Good methods of doing this are participating in social activities where men are present, accepting dates when requested, and spacing dates out.

Attending events where men are present: Do you have a hobby? I joined a running club. It might as well be called, "singles mixer with some running," because that's what it was. Other things to consider are hobby classes, lecture series, book clubs, etc.

Accepting dates when requested: How often do you turn men down because they're not your "type"? I would run the four-man-plan into the ground. If the man isn't giving you the heebie-jeebies, visibly gay, or in a relationship, you go on two dates if he asks for them. It helps you explore your type, you can check off events you wanted to explore (gallery openings, seasonal activities), and if there isn't a mutual spark, maybe he has friends you can meet. If you feel endangered, don't date him. That simple.

Spacing dates out: See a guy once a week, tops. If your rotation is one man, this gives you good distance from developing "one-itis" and lots of time to meet other people.

Do you cut off men who don't make you their priority?

Absolutely. If he reveals he's courting a harem, drop him immediately.

How do people form relationships?

I recommend attending social events related to your interests. Joining clubs and groups. If a man is interested, he'll pursue you. I was on OLD but also ran a trial where I only dated men I met IRL. The same guys that pursued me in real life we also on the apps. Vet scrupulously with all you date.

Men that are interested in you will pursue you. Don't develop feelings further than what the man has expressed and dedicated time and effort into earning. Maintain the rotation for as long as possible. The guy who wants to be with you will pursue exclusivity and developing a relationship. They'll initiate first contact AND the "what are we" conversation. Keep to your standards and focus on yourself.

fakeprewarbook · 2020-03-12T17:35:03+00:00

this is why the three month rule exists

sweatydeath · 2020-03-12T17:16:30+00:00

Which dating apps were you using?

Title	Dating multiple men
Author	redfarmmmmm
Upvotes	24
Comments	7
Date	March 12, 2020 4:44 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/fhjajs/dating_multiple_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/dating-multiple-men.680360 https://theredarchive.com/post/680360

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