I am 22 and just got out of a 2yr long relationship <3 months ago. It was my first serious relationship and was generally pretty miserable. I ended it because he was completely emotionally unavailable and I was bending over backwards for 2 years for even the slightest amount of affection or attention. A completely shitty partner for sure but it took me the longest time to even acknowledge that I deserved more, nonetheless have the self esteem to act on it.

I've been casually dating since and I recently ended things with 3 different men.

Guy #1 is a relatively HVM but I wasn't attracted to him, so... got the chop.

Guy #2 is batshit insane, a total, complete loser, and didn't respect my sexual boundaries at all... so he just got the chop.

Guy #3 admitted to me on our second date this weekend that he still hangs out with his ex/ has sex with her, she's his "best friend", he got her a christmas gift, and he would get back together with her if given the opportunity. Despite the fact I am not looking for a relationship right now, I *refuse* to play second string to someone's ex. 3 years ago though I would've been totally fine with it, because he's an otherwise nice, attractive guy who gives me attention. Will be getting the chop as soon as I have a chance.

I credit this sub a lot for the shift in my thinking. I have a long, long way to go but I read this sub on a daily basis and it's helped so much. Just wanted to share :)