Energy Parasites

2020-06-03T21:21:59+00:00

My co-workers fiance is like this. She's a great woman, and he's a moody manchild. She's always confiding in me about how she isn't in a hurry to leave work because he's feeling pissy today and she just won't even get the chance to be in a good mood. Corona postponed their wedding, and Ive been trying to convince her how great being single had been through this entire quarantine, but she's a lost cause. I just want to rescue all the women in my life

mightbethrowawayyy · 2020-06-03T21:28:02+00:00

Some people are just toxic. They act entitled because they think they’re the center of the universe. They see everyone else as tools. They text you because they want validation. They pretend to be nice to you because they want reciprocation. It’s all about them.

I hope you didn’t reply to him. He was either playing mind games or he was bored and wanted some quick and easy attention from you. When he gets what he wanted (“power” or attention), he will ignore you as ol’ usual because he never cared about you in the first place.

wootykins · 2020-06-04T08:41:34+00:00

When people bring you down it’s because they are so insecure or feel powerless about themselves that they need to bring other people down to their low feelings of self to regain their feeling of power. The book Verbally Abusive Relationships defines this as a person’s need to have “Power Over” another person.

Here’s an anecdote: While visiting my house, my ex saw my Ivy League degree displayed above my fireplace. He said, “You must be SO proud [displaying it like this].” My gut was telling me there was this derision in his voice, but it was a put-down subtle enough that he could easily gaslight me into thinking I was making things up. Why couldn’t he just say, “Nice!” or “That’s cool.”

At the time I let it get to me. “Maybe my degree isn’t worth much; I haven’t gotten anywhere in my career (he earned more than me).” I thought to myself. But looking back I think he felt so insecure he didn’t go to a top school so he just had to bring down my accomplishments.

Another instance: I gave him a tour around my house and asked him what his opinion was. “I’ve lived in places as nice as the Ritz Carlton, but this is nice too.” “I totally understand how fulfilling it feels to buy a house. I own three properties in Chicago myself.”

Old pickmeisha me thought, “I suppose my house isn’t that impressive.” But looking back, why did he have to name drop the Ritz Carlton? Why did he have to mention how many properties he had? Why couldn’t he just say, “Yeah, this is a nice place you have.”

I confronted him about this days later, and his response was “Oh, I was just being me.” Another gaslighting attempt by dismissing my concerns.

The motherfucker even had the audacity to rearrange my furniture because he thought it looked better that way.

Anyways, a week later, my gut was telling me that my energy was being sucked dry and I was losing myself the longer I stayed with him. I felt like he just wanted me to be his personal cheerleader/“yes man” that constantly praised him and told him how amazing he was. So I left. Then it all made sense how much of an emotional vampire he was. Whenever he felt low about himself he’d drag me down with him with covert insults to feel better about himself. I pity him and hope he finds fulfillment and worth beyond money and status.

SuccessfulShow5 · 2020-06-04T16:08:57+00:00

Ew my ex was like this . I like to be silly and make jokes, and for some reason me being in a great mood turned him off or I had to tune it down for him . Shutting my jokes down and giving me blank stares. The Grinch . Lol. Never again I need to be with someone who’s an overall happy person . I feel like some men are intimidated by happy women m, like in a sick sense they know you are happy without them too and they don’t like that .

Stuffenfluff · 2020-06-04T05:09:28+00:00

I love this. I completely agree - some of my lowest points were when my own Queen energy was diluted by a LVM’s shitty vibes. Stay vigilant out there, ladies.

dackaroo · 2020-06-05T02:54:12+00:00

They drag you down instead of meeting you on your level because it would hurt their pride if they admitted to themselves that they need to work or exert energy to get to where a woman is in any way--even energetically.

This is where you see otherwise seeming HVM reveal themselves because this area is too subtle for them to pay attention to. They don't realize they're doing it, so how can they possibly hide it?

Title	Energy Parasites
Author	Dontbeepme911
Upvotes	95
Comments	13
Date	June 3, 2020 6:20 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/gvzbr1/energy_parasites/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/energy-parasites.691989 https://theredarchive.com/post/691989

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