He wont text

DxMePls · 2019-11-04T22:09:50+00:00

This is my best estimate:

We all know that since he's in med school, he's extemely busy with tons of issues to solve and knowledge to memorize

This can cause a lot of stress and perhaps even mental health issues

This means maybe he doesn't have too much leisure time to go out or hang out as he must dedicate a lot of time to studying

So when he's sitting on the toilet or checking his phone when he's not in the hospital or studying, he needs some quick stress reliever by talking to a girl that he clicks with or by swiping through tinder

While he may genuinely be interested in you, I just feel like maybe he has larger priorities right now (i.e passing his courses, not killing any patients on clerkship, not embarassing himself in front of his attending), and is not in the place in his life to start something serious

This is my best guess but I could be 100% wrong since I don't know the nature of your relationship

trouble_ · 2019-11-04T22:10:10+00:00

Does he show any other forms of actual investment? Does he call you on the phone or set up frequent dates? If not... And you've not talked about exclusivity at all... Then put your focus elsewhere. He'll step up his game if he's actually serious. And don't do this spitefully ... Act like life is good and everything is cool. You're a happy go lucky girl and you're on top of the world.

JanTheBrown · 2019-11-04T23:55:27+00:00

I'm an FDS newbie, but also a medical student, so I know first-hand how insane medical school is.

If you haven't been through it, it's hard to believe how busy med students are and furthermore how it affects our emotional and mental health. In second year for example, we are often scheduled 3-4 hours a day for mandatory classes and on top of that have to study 8-12 hours a day. That's like, sitting in a chair 12 hours a day studying, only getting up to use the bathroom, work out or cook quickly/eat. If we don't study on a particular day, we're now behind and won't be able to catch up.

I had to delete my apps at the end of the summer just because I barely have time to text my friends and my mom, let alone some stranger that I met on the internet. YES, I actually have to stop text conversations mid-way and be like "i gotta study" or "i gotta go to class" or even "i gotta scarf down this sandwich before going through another 300 flashcards.

That being said - a lot of us are all fucking lonely and miserable and really just want someone to hold us at night. But it's HARD to make the time to get to know someone.

The fact that he even takes out time to take you on dates is remarkable. He must really like you. If you want to be with him - you have to understand that this is his life right now. He might even hate it or regret it, but it is the way things have to be for the meantime.

Minute_Sign · 2019-11-04T22:10:25+00:00

How important is texting for you in a relationship? If it is fairly important to you then you aren't being 'needy' by telling him to text more. If he doesn't want to take the effort to text more after you explained to him that texting and communication are important to you then maybe you two just aren't compatible. I mean he is a med student which means this lack of communication is just going to get worse with time.

Danbut15 · 2019-11-04T22:03:12+00:00

This is the biggest example as to why you need to ghost and keep it moving. You’ve already have expressed your expectations of how to be treated. He has already failed at that multiple times. And you’ve put yourself in the position of convenience by responding back to him in a timely manner. He just sees you as a filler option not a relationship option. He sends you those lengthy texts as a way to bread crumb you and keep you on the sidelines. Quit getting your hopes over this guy, he’s not worth it. Give him a taste of his own medicine and move on!

TheLastUBender · 2019-11-05T11:17:45+00:00

Maybe not what the majority here will say, but two words: med school. I know people that went through it and the pressure is immense. If he makes time for you regularly and you get along well, this isn't a red flag to me.

Title	He wont text
Author	bunnehluverxxx
Upvotes	22
Comments	11
Date	November 4, 2019 9:42 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/droq1u/he_wont_text/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/he-wont-text.688896 https://theredarchive.com/post/688896

Comments

While he may genuinely be interested in you, I just feel like maybe he has larger priorities right now (i.e passing his courses, not killing any patients on clerkship, not embarassing himself in front of his attending), and is not in the place in his life to start something serious