Hope it's cool I post here. I'm not involved in the dating scene, I am in a committed relationship, but I stumbled across here one day and I lurk and comment sometimes. I wish I would have found this community in my younger years, it would have saved me so much stress and heartache. Its also a nice break from the rest of the world. I feel like a lot of women's communities trend in one of two directions: complaining about really crappy men but putting up with them, or putting up with really crappy men because they are good submissive high value women. This is the only place I read about women expecting to be treated well. I don't feel like everything here applies to my life personally, so again I hope it's okay I'm here lol.

Anyway. Just a rant about holidays. Every woman-centric holiday (valentine's, mother's day, etc) I always see those posts. "Don't let yourself be disappointed this year!!! Tell your man what you want!!!" And everyone chimes in with "yeah I told him exactly where to take me for dinner and exactly what to buy me and it was awesome!!!" Or my favorite- "I don't need a holiday to know I'm important." Like sure, you should express your wants and needs. When we first moved in together there was a bit of a learning curve. We were veeeery different people in our early 20s (again- wish I'd found y'all sooner lol) and there were a lot of mishaps from both of us. But at this point so many years later, i should not have to tell my partner what I like. I've lived with the man for years. He knows what I like. He knows what I value. He knows what is fun for me. Why should I have to say 'Okay dear I want breakfast in bed and then take me out to dinner and buy me flowers." Wtf??? I don't have to luckily, he knows I like flowers and that I hate going out to eat but literally how are you with someone as an adult, have children, and you need to tell them you want a card????