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[–]HoneyBouquetFDS Apprentice19 points20 points21 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Option 1 - dump his ass.
He will try and gaslight you and think you're the crazy one.
It's not worth the pain or trying to educate him.
[–]loudest_gussetFDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
If you have the opportunity to snoop, then do so. Look through his phone, check his social media. Intuition exists for a reason. The best case scenario is that you do find something and have concrete evidence he sucks and you can feel confidence in your decision to leave him. If you find nothing, you're back at square one because it just means he might have hidden his trail.
The second option is to break up with him and risk dumping him over nothing. While it could hurt, and lead to regret, imagine how much more you'd regret it if you learned he was cheating on you months later. Men are abundant and you can find another one.
Third option, riskiest so beware, is to have an honest conversation about your concerns. If the explanation seems sound and reasonable, and you feel assured, then that's great. However, keep in mind you are risking him just lying about it and getting better at hiding. Personally, I don't recommend this one, but feelings are feelings and sometimes heartbreak is the only thing that gives us the wisdom to trust our intuition in the first place.
The biggest problem with all of this is that once you doubt him at all, inevitably the feeling will come back, and where there is no trust, there is no happiness or love. If a man ever makes you feel insecure about the relationship, it will happen again, so you should leave and find another man that will never let you feel that way.
[–]MuffinSongsFDS Disciple4 points5 points6 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
He gave me his passcode, but I fn forgot it because I thought I’d never need it. I kinda regret that now.
[–]loudest_gussetFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If you wanna get his passcode you will. Try some birthdays, 0000, 1111, 5555, and 1234. Don't do it all consecutively or you will get locked out. You can also pretend your phone is out of battery and be like "babe, whats the passcode? i need to see the weather/gps/whatever"
The benefit of asking him for the passcode is that if you go snooping through it when he's asleep and he changed it, then he's definitely hiding something and that's evidence enough. Bonus if he sleeps with his phone under his pillow.
[–]nutshitFDS STRATEGY COACH10 points11 points12 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Your intuition is probably right. Whatever you do, just remember that when you break up with a guy, you either get rid of someone who was holding you back or he proves himself to you. Either way... win win situation. I’m sorry this happened to you i wish you the best of luck and love! 🦋
[–]MuffinSongsFDS Disciple7 points8 points9 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I’m not gonna leave this up long because I don’t think there are many people with this particular problem right now and I don’t want to show my cards if he finds it.
[–]mycatpukesglitterFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
So sorry he’s doing this to you :/ I wish you the best of luck and happiness in moving on in your life. We all deserve to be happy with people who love us and only us.
[+][deleted] 6 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
[deleted]
[–]ShieldMaidenLagerthaFDS Apprentice3 points4 points5 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
All you gave to ask yourself is: “Is this situation acceptable to me?” Are you ok with strange calls, broken plans, odd texts, and feeling insecure in your relationship. If no, just tell him “This is not working out for me, we’re not a match, and I need to be single.”
I would NOT confront him regarding possible homosexual affairs. Men who present themselves as straight have been known to become violent when confronted with their secret life. Your safety is more important than anything he could say to you in discussing the situation.
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[–]HoneyBouquetFDS Apprentice19 points20 points21 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]loudest_gussetFDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]MuffinSongsFDS Disciple4 points5 points6 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]loudest_gussetFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]nutshitFDS STRATEGY COACH10 points11 points12 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]MuffinSongsFDS Disciple7 points8 points9 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]mycatpukesglitterFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[+][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
[deleted]
[–]ShieldMaidenLagerthaFDS Apprentice3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link