Some names I've been called when I spoke up: cold bitch, angry bitch, sassy, feisty, heartless, man, pushover, crazy, crazy, crazy, needy, demanding, asshole, unpleasant, demonic. By both men and women. And sometimes when I'm lost or when words start to hurt, I start to think maybe I am mean, maybe I should listen to other people more, I might learn something new. No no no and NO. This is social conditioning I was subjected to since I was a wee lass. If you have the ability to reflect on yourself, you are not an abuser. Abusers never reflect on themselves. Stop disappointing yourself.

Stop accommodating people, being polite and giving chances blah blah blah and step into your power. Fake power is through fear and intimidation, real power is through empowerment. It's a really scary to stand up to abusers and people who think they can treat you like a doormat and push on your buttons. Whatever they're saying is a reflection of them and don't call out on their behavior or complain about it. They are eternally miserable people and because they are so miserable, most people end up leaving them and they wonder why. Choose your battles wisely. Focus on living a fulfilling life. If anything, relationships should come last because if you live a HV life with HV standards and HV boundaries, the people you'll eventually meet will be HV. Law of attraction!

When I first came across FDS, I was like 'oh no, then aren't we being abusive?' 'I don't want to be mean' 'that's too extreme-feminist' 'have to be fair' blah blah blah. F'ck that. Did it ever come across their minds about consent, respecting boundaries and standing for equality? NO. Politeness? I know many countries live with politeness but it seems more of a weakness. You can be straightforward and cordial. I've had people telling me 'Oh you shouldn't have said that' and looking back these people were LV. I theorize that many people hate this sub because we say things the way they are and make many points in their faces, which they don't like and find it uncomfortable. Well, change is never a comfortable thing.

Baseline, FDS ladies, step up to your power!