Take notice.

futuristicallyangry · 2020-11-09T14:31:03+00:00

Can't stress upon this enough. It's very important to dissect how a man is listening to you and how he refers to the things you've told him later. The men I saw seemed to be great listeners but they turned verbally abusive and made personal attacks during conflicts. Just because a man is a good listener doesn't mean he is showing effort, it has a totally sinister effect. A good example of a good listener would be someone who remembers what things bring you joy so they'd bring something you would like, for example, if someone searches and gets salted caramel chocolate macarons for you based on the one time you told them you had the best salted caramel dessert at a party. A guy who says "well it's always something about your estranged father" or "well didn't you like the spotlight on you that day?" During a conflict or anything super gaslit or twisted, run. He did it once, he will do it again. A guy once called me a "druggie" in a fight based on how I had told him I am taking anti anxiety medication. You can already guess how I dumped him.

fireforestfairy · 2020-11-09T13:43:06+00:00

Yeah there are some psychopaths out there. Unfortunately, many of them are good at faking empathy which is why so many people end up as their victims.

textbasedpanda · 2020-11-09T16:03:05+00:00

But how can you tell the difference before it gets the the point when he attacks your weak points?

atuan · 2020-11-09T23:45:21+00:00

Exactly. I thought he was asking questions because he had curiosity and really wanted to learn about me and my knowledge and interests. He only wanted to stroke my ego and then when things turned bad made sure to say humiliating things whenever I asserted a boundary.

orangechickengeneral · 2020-11-10T00:27:29+00:00

And that is why we don't share our weaknesses or vulnerabilities with men. That's what therapy and friends are for.

Title	Take notice.
Author	Hilary_1
Upvotes	474
Comments	6
Date	November 9, 2020 9:08 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/jque9w/take_notice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/take-notice.338789 https://theredarchive.com/post/338789

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